For me the worst thing is not having a helper anymore

by John Aquila 27 Replies latest jw experiences

  • Lee Elder
    Lee Elder

    It seems clear, at least to me, that if there is a God - he is certainly a "non-interventionist". The reasons are unknown - perhaps unknowable. For that reason, I chose to think of myself as a Deist, because I am inclined to “believe” God exists, even though there is no concrete proof of this.

    I am also inclined to believe that he has given us enormous power and the ability to solve our problems and take care of one another - if we chose to. I am also inclined to believe that prayer has some practical value even though I rarely pray myself anymore. There is great value in living your life with an attitude of gratitude. No matter what your station in life, you are wise to appreciate the amazing opportunity it is to be alive and ponder these kinds of issues. Life is nothing less than “miraculous” regardless of how it came to be – the same thing can be said for the Cosmos.

    On the question of Jesus. I have little doubt he was a historical person. He clearly left a lasting impression on those who knew him, and is able to inspire all of us with his life and sayings. It is very unfortunate that so much evil has been done in his name by his followers.

    Even if much of his life and story are fictional or metaphorical, I believe there is great value there if properly understood and used. I have no problem thinking of myself as a “follower” of Jesus and trying to live my life in way of Jesus.

    Are Jesus or Jehovah “real” in the sense we believed as Jehovah's Witnesses? Almost certainly not. No one there to save us from ourselves or “time and unforeseen occurrence”. That is a disconcerting thought as you have said. On the other hand, what real value is there in believing fanciful notions with no basis in fact? I suppose part of the upside to the realization is that there is also no Armageddon or Great Tribulation to worry about. No mass destruction of billions of people to keep you up at night. There is also opportunity to live your life in such a way as to really count and make a difference for yourself, family and others - if so choose to do so.

  • Phaedra
    I miss the comfort, too. Really, really, miss it.
  • CalebInFloroda

    This might sound funny, but I have no idea what you folks are talking about.

    Who on earth were you worshipping? I've never had an emotional high or felt comforted by "knowing God was there."

    I never believed, ever, that G-d owed it to me to answer my prayers.

    In fact, my relationship with G-d, especially now, is often very silent, dark, bumpy, and occasionally a struggle.

    Sometimes there's what turns out to be the equivalent of an argument, with more question marks than acknowledging nods from both parties.

    It's not that I don't feel some sort of something there, but I would never say that whatever it is that it puts my mind at ease. It's highly complex, as intellectually honest as it is transcendent of any logic. It is a sweetness that produces nausea, an understanding that leaves me guessing, and a cold, lonely darkness that inspires with hope.

    It's like being in love with somebody. They are just as irritating and grinding on you as they are important to your heart.

    Now I am not saying you need to worship my Deity or take up my religion or even believe in G-d. No, not at all.

    But even when I was among Jehovah's Witnesses I never understood "God" like others seemed to. I still don't understand G-d on any level, and yet I have full grasp at the same time.

    He chases me down yet I am always after him. Worshipping him is full of happiness and sorrow making complete sense and none at all. It is all that makes up life, it's confusion, it's satisfaction, it's emptiness, it's fulfillment.

    Prayer is not even words sometimes. There is very little asking of G-d. There is a lot asked from G-d. I find myself here when he is not, and he finds he just missed me and will have to try again.

    Being with G-d is good and bad, ugly and beautiful, just like life is, all of it. But if I ever said I didn't need G-d, I would not miss comfort or someone I felt was there obliged to help or grant my wishes like a genie. I don't know this in my experiences.

    And I am not trying to be condescending. I really cannot relate. If that was all there was to G-d, I'd reject G-d too.

  • Muddy Waters
    Muddy Waters

    ... We were like Dumbo believing in the Magic Feather.....

    I miss that comfort too.... Believing that I "knew".... that we had the answers... That we had the goddamn f***ing truth.

    And now to feel so all alone... It hits me hard ... Yet I also feel that we are all in this together, though each person faces his own unknown destiny.

    And I too, am now next in line, that "buffer" is all gone, my mommy having passed away the past few months... An experience I have yet to talk about on here. She was never a JW, thank god. I got into that stupidity all by myself....

    The world feels smaller .... and I understand the phrase more and more that "each man is an island."

  • jwfacts
    For me it was a blessing to be freed from such superstitious belief. God's apparent randomness at addressing prayers always confused me. Once I realised the outcomes of my life where the product of hard work and circumstance I could become more focussed on success.
  • stan livedeath
    stan livedeath
    when i was married to my first wife--a born in---she insisted i prayed out loud with her every night before we went to sleep. this went on for the first 3 years of the marriage--till i said enough is enough. i wasnt struck down dead--either by her or her invisible friend. that was 44 years ago.
  • The Rebel
    The Rebel

    I loved him, until I discoverd he was a God with no bark and no authority. Now I don't pray to Jehover. I hate that mental illness that made me pray to a Jehover who was " Thou shalt not do this, thou shalt not do that ! A God who wants to wipe the masses of his creation from the earth. I haven't forgotten the names of his fans. Russell. Rutherford, Fredrick Franz, the list goes on to the Jacksons of today. I loath those people, and I loath their God.

    However I still like to condition my mind, in what some may call prayer. I wouldn't say I am praying to a God, maybe just trying to connect with the positive energy of the universe. Anyway it works for me. It conditions my mind to be stronger and face problems more positively.

    The Rebel.

  • floriferous

    I would like to see Angus Stewart quiz Jehovah god about his role in the child abuse scandal.

    I would want to ask God "Didn't your son say 'Truly I tell you, if you have faith as small as a mustard seed, you can say to this mountain, 'Move from here to there,' and it will move. Nothing will be impossible for you.'

    Didn't he also say "What is the price of two sparrows--one copper coin? But not a single sparrow can fall to the ground without your Father knowing it. Indeed, the very hairs of your head are all numbered. Don't be afraid; you are worth more than many sparrows"

    In view of what your 'son' said how can you claim you did not know the abuse was happening?

    Why then God didn't you answer the desperate cries for help from the small children as their abusers ripped their little vaginas?

    Did you decide their faith was not 'as large as a mustard seed'& therefore decided to let the abuser satisfy their dreadful cravings?

    What would you think of a man or woman that was present when an act of child abuse took place but did nothing to prevent it?

    Would you not view them as culpable?

    That's what I would ask Jehovah God.

Share this