Just a Rant .......

by LOLS 21 Replies latest jw friends

  • john.prestor

    smiddy3, honestly, I can't argue with that, hahaha.

    LOLS, if you've got more ranting to do, rant away. It's really healthy.

  • WingCommander

    How about you give your inconsiderate POS husband...........a DIVORCE!!!!

  • snugglebunny

    I recall that the WT didn't give the OK for celebrating wedding anniversaries until the early 60's. Before then it was classed along with celebrating birthdays and Christmas. Anathema.

    My own parents were delighted and made upbuilding comments such as "Isn't Jehovah kind to us" and "How thoughtful of the FDS to have looked into this".

  • dubstepped

    This is "just a rant" and he's just a jerk. I hope you directed this same rant his way. He needs to know how he makes you feel, also the kids.

    The sad reality is that the cult will always come first if he's in it. I know what it's like to be that kid as a child and an adult. I'd try to take my dad fishing but we could never go in the morning because he had to go in service every Saturday without fail and then he'd have an elders meeting or something after. We pretty much always fished in the heat of the day but that's all that was left. You always get whatever leftovers there are after the cult comes first.

  • john.prestor

    dubstepped, I'm sorry to hear that. My father never made much time for me either (although I was raised in a fundamentalist Baptist church) so I get what it's like...

    He also got so beyond in child support once that my mother wrote him a letter telling him my brother and were about to go to college and she needed the money. He wrote her back and said something like, We had a missionary at our church and I wanted to give them some money but because I'm paying so much in child support, I just forgot about it.

  • tiki

    Dubs aren't the only ones who forget anniversaries or put some other activity or pursuit first and the celebration gets pre-empted.....a weekend eat out when the occasion falls in the workweek is pretty common actually...be glad for that. Some wives don't get a blessed thing on their anniversary....

  • Incognigo Montoya
    Incognigo Montoya

    I wouldn't necessarily attribute his forgetting to being a JW. He may have "forgotten" because he's a JW, and you're an UBM, and he may just have really just forgotten. Also, as tiki pointed out, many people put off a personal weekly holiday celebration (anniversary, birthday), and prefer to celebrate the occasion on a weekend, where they can relax and enjoy it without the stress and demands of a regular work day interfering. This does not keep a husband, however, from wishing his wife a "happy anniversary", giving her flowers, or doing/giving some other little affectionate token on their actual anniversary.

    You didn't specify anywhere that I saw, is he a busy guy? Does he have a demanding job? Is he sometimes forgetful? Any unusual stress factors come up in his life recently? These all could be reasons he forgot.

    I am not a marriage counselor, nor would I ever presume to know your complete situation, but from what you've posted I will say this. It's obvious from your recent posts that you are struggling with him. Imo, this post seems like you are looking for a reason to find fault and attribute it to his being a JW. Perhaps you should take some time and consider whether or not you still love him and want to remain his wife. If so, maybe some counseling is in order. Understand, I am not saying this is your fault whatsoever. From your previous post in reference to him and your marriage, he is the one who's made a drastic change by going back to being a JW. That's really not fair to you. Your hurt and blame are completely understandable. But it's not healthy to allow those feelings and thoughts to fester until it becomes gangrenous and causes irreparable damage.

    I sincerely hope you find a way to work things out.

  • Vidiot

    This, sad to say, doesn't really surprise me too much.

    In my experience, most devout, loyal JWs don't actually treat their "unbelieving mates" as all that important.

  • steve2

    Luckily, JW organization "allows" the individual the freedom to choose whether or not to observe wedding anniversaries. Yet, to be consistent, these anniversaries are simply "birthdays" of the wedding ceremony. Most of the arguments the organization uses against" celebrating birthdays apply equally to wedding anniversaries (first century Christians did not celebrate wedding anniversaries, the Bible does not tell you to celebrate wedding anniversaries, it is a man-made and worldly celebration, it makes the couple the centre of attention when that should go to Jehovah alone, you don't need a special day to remember a marriage - you can do that any day, etc).

  • Nevuela

    Tell him that if he thinks God really loves you two, and if He thinks marriage is SO sacred, He would prefer that you celebrate your once-a-year anniversary over a bi- or tri-weekly meeting. All the pointless crap he'd learn from the meeting is in the WT anyway, so he wouldn't miss a thing as long as he has a copy to read at home.

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