if someone came to my door claiming to be jesus. . .
i would explain to him that times have changed and that i need some proof in order to believe,
being that he is the understanding individual that he is im sure he would understand and be willing to oblige. . .
i would tell him to hold on a second and i would return with 4 items so that he could prove himself. . .
4. Reem of Printer Paper
i would explain to him that though we still drink wine, i would need evidence of something more current, for i already am familiar with his water to wine magic trick.
i would ask him to convert my items into :
3. Amphetamines/Barbituates/ Ecstasy
having passed the test i would let him in for if nothing else he is quite the party animal. . .