belly up to the bar, guys and gals

by unanswered 34 Replies latest jw friends

  • unanswered

    with all the confrontation/negativity on the board these last few weeks, maybe we all need to sit back and have a drink, or a cup of tea or coffee, if alcohol's not for you.

    seriously, i'm not trying to pretend that i haven't gotten caught up in the negativity at times, or trivialize important issues/feelings, but things haven't been as fun, lately. i've noticed a change even in the short time i've been posting. i didn't start this topic to point fingers or to act like my opinion is somehow special, but wouldn't it be nice for all of us to see an increase in civility?

    i don't have a magic solution, i just thought talking about it might help. maybe not, but it's worth a try. i think that the more we get angry with each other, the further this board moves from the type of place that most of us(?) would like it to be. i know anger and negativity can't always be avoided, but i thought it would be interesting to see how everyone feels about all this. if i'm alone in my opinion, i will bow out. not trying to step on toes-nate

  • wasasister

    Unanswered: thanks for the invite. I either drink green tea or red wine.

    I agree. My basic nature is peaceful and I try not to get caught up in petty personality disputes. I'm old and wise enough to know how to pick my battles. As the popular book says, I don't sweat the small stuff, and most of it is small stuff.

    A week or two ago, I was in the chat room and I found Mommy and I were on very differents sides of a particular issue (doesn't matter the issue). She stated her arguments and I stated mine. Although both of us had compelling things to say, I doubt either of us changed our mind. I happen to feel passionatly about the subject, so it was not insignificant to me. I feel I have a better understanding of Mommy and her intelligence. We went past the issue and have spoken since then many times. (I think we're becoming friends, although I can't speak for her.) It struck me how nice it would be if we were able to disagree, state our opinions, listen to opposing views, and remain friends. No insults, no name-calling, no invoking unrelated topics.

    How many cups of green tea do you think that would take? Nah, make mine a Merlot.


  • riz

    Hi nate

    Thanks for posting this. I think it's good to address these issues. You are brave! I admire you for sticking your neck out.
    These last couple of weeks have been interesting. We are all dealing with our own situations and this board has helped me a lot in coming to terms with my own feelings.
    I am grateful to have a place to express myself. As we all know, we were never allowed to do this in the hall. But I have noticed lately that the 'mood' of the forum has been on the tense side. It would be a shame if this forum went into a downward spiral like h2o. I somehow doubt that would happen, but it certainly would be a tragedy.
    I really enjoy the people here. I think everyone makes valuable contributions, and the humor that shines through often makes me burst out laughing. I know there has been a huge influx of posters in the last month or so, myself included. I'm looking forward to the dust settling a bit.
    Nate, as long as you're offering, I'll have a vodka and grapefruit juice please.


  • hippikon

    I'll have a Depth Charge thanks. I think I'll get cyber drunk at the cyber bar. Hey what the hell make it two.

    "Im a happy drunk"

    "But it does move"

  • mommy

    ((((HUGS))))) Wassa
    I agree. LOL I have had several of those conversations with people in chat. The people I have had differences of opinion with are the ones I most look forward to speaking to. I just love it when someone can speak their peace without all the senseless name calling. I detracts from the discussion.
    BTW next time I have the night off...I might spend it in chat with you, and a glass of wine. Any suggestions?

  • wasasister

    Thanks Mommy. I know we'll get accused of stroking each other, but I really am proud of the way we handled our diverse opinions the other night. It would be very sexist of me to suggest it is because women settle differences better than I won't.

    As to the wine, come on over and we'll sample a few. I think you'd like a cab/merlot blend. If not, the Vodka/Grapefruit thing sounded refreshing!

  • unanswered

    i see i'm going to have to restock my bar.

    isacoolsister-the healthy dialogue you mentioned is exactly what i'm hoping to see more of.:)

    riz-you already know how awesome i think you are.

    hipikon-you're a man after my own heart.

  • TR


    that's why I suggested a "flame forum" a while back. Heated arguments could be taken out of the main area and dealt with in an isolated area. Just a thought.


  • unanswered

    TR-i missed your suggestion before, it definitely sounds good. that way there would be a place for those knock down drag out arguments when people wanted to get into them. i'm not trying to be unrealistic here folks, i understand that there is a time and a place for everything.-nate

  • outnfree

    It's true, it's true -- I got fed up with Wayne and what I thought was righteously indignant at both the lightweight issue of CO's and their dietary requirements and the heavierweight issue of those elders in Missouri who are busy being the Society's pawns (oops! there I go again! SIGH!) who are refusing to tell what they know of an alleged confession of a child rapist.

    I pledge to be less sarcastic if some of our Aussie friends can supply me with a glass or two of Blues Point Chardonnay Semillion.


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