Angry at first
Thanks everyone. This is truly a process trying to sort everything I out. But I am taking things one day at a time. My mom was on my mind heavy when I wrote this post and hubby was asleep, so Im glad I feel comfortable enough to come here and share when I need to. The support is great and I really do appreciate all of the insight and kind words.
BEAUTIFUL MIND- I understand your anger. My parents are around 90 years old now and have been in the JW cult for almost 65 years since 1951. Once they die- MY anger stems from the fact that they were lied to ALL these years that they would " live forever in a Paradise earth never dying " if they stayed "" faithful " to the WT Society.
And that will be a point I will bring up to my older JW brother and JW siblings at any funeral of my parents. That mom and dad were lied to. That they weren't SUPPOSED to die - according to their beliefs. WT lied to them. I'm angered for the WT Society wasting all of my mom & dad's years and that them following WT Society advice - has divided my JW family from those of us in the family who have escaped the cult. Anger ? You bet, I understand- I have lots of it and resentment too towards this criminal organization
I have to chime in with Flipper. You can reach a state of peace about not seeing a loved one after their death ever again, but you have to process how they wasted their life in that religion instead of spending more time enjoying the life they had.....how they allowed Watchtower to separate them from family.
Like Flipper, I try to remember that they were lied to, I was lied to, and make sure my resentment is toward the organization. But also, I try to move on and let go of what I can.
OTWO- I agree with you- it's healthy to feel anger, but we can't let that anger or resentment rob us of the enjoyable things we can pursue in life at present. There has to be a balance indeed. I too try to accomplish that balance in my life as well. Good point you make . Take care, Peace out, Mr. Flipper
You are aware that (since you're not a JW anymore) you're perfectly free to believe in an afterlife if you want, right?.
Flipper and OTWO - I couldn't have said it better! Angry at the org. But maintain my happiness for myself and my family. Gotta enjoy life right?
Vidiot - I'm very newly awake, just a few months, so I haven't explored that and many other avenues about what happens after death. But it does feel good to know Im free to look into it when Im ready!
@Beautiful mind- when I read your post at breakfast I felt as if I'd been punched in the abdo. The realisation of not believing came home to roost. Everyday I'm discovering that as I emerge from the rabbit hole, it's a scary world out there. Tho not as stressful as operating within the borginization. I'm having to reprogramme my thinking abilities. Try and undo 30+ years of drinking the kool aide.
My dad died 18 months ago and within a week they had me in a kingdom hall,and prayed on my emotions and mental torture i was going through, by drumming it into me that one day soon id see my daddy again,i am horrified and just like you devastated that i know now i was fed a pack of bs.
It really hurts,i was also daddys girl and i miss him everyday,i feel your pain,i hope one day they all wake up to the fact that they ruin so many peoples lives,i got lucky i didnt get dunked im an unbaptised publisher trying to get out.
Wish you all the best.x