I have done little to help anyone out. I know that if those I love that are still JWs really realize how I feel about the WTS, they would run like a bat out of hell to get away from me, lest whatever thing I have, if it is contageous reach out and touch them. I was talking to night to one of my closest friend, rare since I came out with my news about taking a hiatus and she was imploring me to come back. I tried to say to her, I don't know if this is really the truth any more (nicest most tactful thing I could say even though I feel so much stronger about it). She got upset that I have doubts and I said she has never doubted the society even when she was dfd years ago. I told her maybe that is it, maybe we were brainwashed and never thought to question it, since we were raised with it. I told her that was why it was important to me to take a step back and really seriously look at things. She ended up getting cut off on the phone and didn't call me back. I was fine with it, as I could see we were getting no where. She followed it up with an email later, sorry my battery died on my phone and added, it was probably a good thing, as she was about ready to start crying.. that is all I need.. tears.. to guilt me back. I'm keeping my mouth shut about my feelings. When you are a JW, sometimes you have to be ready for doubts.. those in my life are not.