I'm the Dad of a Silent Lamb...

by CoonDawg 36 Replies latest jw friends

  • Banshee


    As your sister and a sexual abuse surivor myself (at the hands of more than one JW), you know I am outraged at how the elders have completely mishandled the situation. Even worse, your daughter's own mother is not acting in the best interests of her child. This is sickening!

    I am proud of you for showing your daughter that she does matter and that what happens to her is important to you and that you are ready to go to whatever lengths necessary to protect her and pursue justice for her.

    As I said to you before, Bruce and I are in your corner and if there is anything at all that we can do to help, you KNOW we will. Love you, bro.


  • avishai

    Man, yeah, I know of the boe letter, but when you read the arrogance of their press statements, & that joke of a shrink they have on their site saying " We did'nt know this was bad, 20 yrs. ago. that it would cause lasting damage. In this release, read where JR clown says "It's not our job to report pedophiles" http://www.jehovahs-witness.com/forum/thread.aspx?id=38320&site=3. This attitude, talking outa the side of their mouthe shows that they plan on business as usual for the jw, brazenly doing whatever the hell they want, damn the consequences. Lying b@$tards.

    Go get 'em. No prisoners. No fear. No distractions, take them out by suing them for everything they have. This is the only thing that will cause policy change, as that is the only thing they understand, a publishing co. that made almost 1 bil. tax free, that does'nt go to fund charities or anything, like other churches, also they loan the kh's their own money to them at interest. Where does all this money go, I wonder? Hopefully, to those who've been abused.

  • pr_capone

    I hope the elders and whomever caused your child harm suffer. I hope you nail their asses to the wall. If the troof is unwilling to help and the law is unable to help, I'm sure that more than a few of us would be ready and willing to put a big hurt on them for you and your child.

    Please let you kid know that they are baing though about and we all hope that they will be doing better soon.

  • Aztec

    Get custody of her NOW! This sickens me and I hope you know I'm here if you ever need to talk! Take care hon!


  • Mary

    Coon, I am so sorry to hear what you're going through with these brain-dead elders. It's amazing how they've known about this for over 2 months and still haven't done a f#cking thing about it, but if they catch you celebrating Christmas, you're disfellowshipped at the next frigging meeting...............I'm glad to see you're considering a lawsuit because this'll be the only thing that'll force change.........I'm trying to decide whether I like Bendrr or Francois' idea for what you should do to the creep who did this to your daughter.

    Keep us posted.

  • freedom96

    I cannot imagine what is going through your mind right now. I would be livid, as I pretty much am just reading your story. I would be going nuts.

    Anyways, best wishes, go get them. Every one of them, and please keep us posted as the events occur.

  • Jesika

    Coon, I am so sorry this is happening. I will email you so you can talk with me privately. I am also a lamb.

    I will email you soon.


  • outnfree

    ((((CoonDawg and daughter))))))

    I am so sorry for this pain in your life. I wish you the best in prosecuting not only the perpetrator but also the individual elders who disregarded Missouri law for approximately 2 months (and will they even report NOW, after your phone call? Doubtful.). I wish your daughter healing and strength. And I thank you for posting the applicable Missouri statutes, because the state I live in (Michigan) does NOT have mandatory reporting for ministers and that's something I'd like to change. It helps to be able to have examples of present laws on the books elsewhere for legislators here to see.

    Go get 'em!


  • Big Tex
    Big Tex


    Oh my God.

    I am a survivor of incest and sexual abuse. Most of my abuse took place in Missouri. Have you ever heard of a little town called Cassville? It's near Branson. That's where we lived. There was even a street named after my grandfather. Your story, for a lot of reasons, hits me hard.

    First, your daughter. She can, and with YOUR help, she will overcome this trauma. Obviously you know she will need professional counseling. But even more important than that, I can tell you that a child will grow up and have as "normal" a life as anyone, irregardless of how hideous the abuse she suffered, so long as she knows and hears from you and your ex-wife the following: 1) she is loved. Say it over and over for the rest of her life. No matter what she does, how old she is or where you both are in your life, tell her this. I cannot emphasis this enough; she needs tender and compassionate love from both her parents. 2) what happened was not her fault. Say it over and over, because it will take many times for her to believe it. 3) Give her space to talk, if she feels like talking. She may talk about what happened, she may not. But she needs the freedom and space to get that stuff out. She's just had a load of shit dumped on her. She's going to need your help, and your ex-wife's, to put that shit back where it belongs. But it can be done. I know. I've been where your daughter is right now and I was able to get out without my parents' help. If she has your help, and your ex-wife's, she will recover and be as healthy and happy in adult life as anyone.

    Secondly, yourself and your ex-wife. Take this in and believe it: what happened to your daugher was not your fault. Guilt, anger and sadness are normal reactions. You may or may not be feeling them right now; if not, they will come. Realize what happened was hideous and evil, but you are good parents and you are doing your best. You can, and will, recover and prosper from this situation. Use your anger productively. You will find it healing. Revenge is not healthy, but channeling your anger is. You mentioned pursuing legal action. That is good. Pursue it as far as you feel you need to. Go after the individuals as well as the organization. You can own these men's houses if you wish. You can make them remember you until they are well past retirement age. You are not powerless, indeed you are in a very powerful position. I know how I would react in your situation. You seem like a good man to me and I think you feel about this as I would.

    In my wife's old congregation, before she finally stopped going, we found out there was a convicted sex offender. He was registered with the state of Texas and yet the elders never told anyone. In fact, they allowed and encouraged him to attend several congregation get togethers including a roller skating party that was for children only. My children were at that roller skating party. Thank God nothing happened. But it could have. I never thought Jehovah's Witnesses were evil, until I realized the depths of their policy toward pedophilia. The damage they can do, and have allowed others to do, is unimaginable.

    My email is open. Please feel free to contact me if you want. It will get better, I promise.

    Take care and good luck,


    Edited by - Big Tex on 1 January 2003 16:19:31

  • cruzanheart

    ((((((CoonDawg & daughter))))))

    I just came back from seeing "The Wild Thornberrys Movie" with our daughter, son, and daughter's friend. I think I was the only parent who cried for the first five minutes of the movie because I was thinking of you and your daughter. I am SO SORRY about what has happened and what is happening, and I know that is inadequate. Sue the bastards. And give your ex hell for not telling you sooner.



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