IS THIS A HEALING PLACE?

by hamptonite21 15 Replies latest jw friends

  • hamptonite21
    hamptonite21

    Many come to this board with wounds from the past in the Jdub dom. Sometimes this place just pours salt in these wounds, attacking peoples character and support groups that people seek refuge. (ie silent lambs) Im sure in disgust many have vacated the board. Why is this? I believe in freedom of speech, but at times I also believe in the movement of a positive spirit. What are your thoughts?

  • RandomTask
    RandomTask

    This place is whatever you make of it and whatever you take from it. Nothing more, nothing less.

  • ozziepost
    ozziepost

    It's part of the journey, Hamptonite, but it's not the destination.

  • LB
    LB

    It has been for me. When I first came I received lots of good advice. I was also attacked by a couple of idiots who have since gone away. The board has plenty of freedom of speech. The same freedoms you enjoy when you walk into my living room. Should you act foolish I would ask you to tone it down. If that doesn't work I'd ask you to leave. That is how it works here.

    Edited by - LB on 18 December 2002 18:24:40

  • hamptonite21
    hamptonite21

    I think the attitude of many on the board has changed since I started posting here, At first it was warmer, now its very attacking. At times I am afraid to share my thoughts with others, for fear that they my be ripped apart. Do others feel the same? What can we do? I introduced a friend to the board, they observed, I thought it might help them to get advice and comfort, since they are trying to do the fade. Their response was, " all they do is argue" cant blame them.

    Edited by - hamptonite21 on 18 December 2002 18:28:18

  • larc
    larc

    Hamptonite, you say "many" here cause trouble. I think the majority are supportive, and only a few are negative. I think there is a tendency to remember the few over the many. Also, the disagreements tend to lead to longer threads and thereby get noticed more. I don't think you need to be concerned about expressing your issues. Most who do are treated very kindly. Have been treated badly thus far?

  • Guest 77
    Guest 77

    For your safety and security, I suggest you carry a BIG stick and wield it when you see fit! Enjoy your walk.

    Guest 77

  • Gopher
    Gopher

    You can pick the threads to participate in. If you find a thread to be too disturbing or negative just skip it. If people try to personally downgrade you, don't take it personally. They don't really know you. And just remember no matter how bad you feel if someone gets negative with you here, there are still (more importantly) people here to support you and anyone through the ex-JW journey (for as long as you choose to be here).

    When I said "you" -- I wasn't singling you out. I meant "you" in the general sense of whoever comes here.

  • jimbob
    jimbob

    I found this site from doing a search on the internet. At first I was hesitant to look, because after all, anything on the internet about JDubs is bad. But after awhile, I really enjoyed coming here because it helped me answer many of my questions as I was leaving the borg, and I appreciated the fact that there were so many more people like me with questions...(okay, A LOT MORE!) But I tried to hide the fact that I came here from my wife, because I was afraid she'd think I was turning apostate (Oh, wouldn't that be terrible..Ha) But I'm now glad to say that even she looks at this board every so often, but she doesn't post on it. But we've both gotten a kick out of many of the things that people have posted. I for one am extremely thankful for this board and especially appreciative of Simon for running it!

  • Seven
    Seven

    I'm sure in disgust many have vacated the board. Why is this?
    Hello hamptonite21, I was hoping you were going to ask why others have stayed? The ranting, the attacks, the support, friendships, information and the break ups just to make ups are all a part of who we are.

    There are as many reasons for leaving as there are posters who have left. The most positive of all are those who have found their place in the world and have "crossed over." They are no longer exjws even though they are long gone from their respective KH's. They just "are." Anyhow, in my mind these few have found true happiness in spite of the scar tissue that they will always carry. Posters like AhHa, Mark and Stephen come to mind when I think of the cross overs. I love them and miss them and would love to hear from them but would never wish them back. My goal is to be where they're at someday.

    Yes, this is a healing place for all of us who choose to remain here at this particular point in our lives. Tell your friend there are times when we love as well as hate each other with a passion(usually only temporary with the latter ). :) We mirror a real family and the real world in this respect. It's nothing unusual or to be alarmed about.

    I was once afraid like you to share my thoughts. Now a few years later I could care less. People can say what they want. And they will. :) I'm a better person for having hung here and run the gauntlet. You will be too. Stick around. You may even make some friends for life and you'll know when it's your time to cross over.

    cheers,

    seven

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