What to say to the elders

by freedom96 32 Replies latest jw friends

  • freedom96
    freedom96

    So the elders come a knockin. They ask "the question": So, do you consider yourself a Jehovah's Witness?

    What is the correct answer so they don't DA or DF you?

    I normally would not care, in fact I would DA myself, but with a young child involved, and about 2 friends, I do not want any label on me except for "spiritually weak."

  • Joyzabel
    Joyzabel

    Mulan gave some good advice about this before. She said ask them, how do you view me? Put it back in their court for the answer to avoid the Da'ing or Df'ing.

    Good luck, its their rules and their "label".

  • kelsey007
    kelsey007

    Then if I were you I would attend the meetings as a spiritually weak person. How is this little child going to feel about you when he/she learns that you did not take an honest stand for what you believe in? It's ok to lie to be with someone you love?

    Not for me. I say take your stand- speak your heart. Let all know that you stand for honesty and if they choose to shun you for honesty- the child will know you did the proper thing and learn from your life. The child will also have a better perspective about jw's from an honest view.

  • emancipated
    emancipated

    when the child is old enough, then tell them the truth about the truth. If you have extended family in the truth it is hard to leave

  • freedom96
    freedom96

    kelsey-

    Thanks for your comments. I suppose the challenge that I am having, is that if I am df'd, then my ex will do everything in her power to make sure that my child and I don't see each other. Sure, there are consequences for her in court, but that won't stop her. Plus, even though she really can't keep my child from seeing me, (she has done, and will continue to do,) she will continue to instill the WTS crap into him, saying how he really shouldn't be seeing me. This will cause even more trouble after he turns 18, when he legally doesnt have to come over, and the WTS might have its grip on him, and make life miserable if he sees me.

    This whole thing sucks. I work hard to let him understand the way it should be. He lives far away, so only visits during school vacations. Otherwise, my ex and the local congregation have all the time they need to try to control him.

  • freedom96
    freedom96

    PS

    There is no way in hell I am going back to the meetings under any circumstances.

  • kelsey007
    kelsey007

    With my children- their mom is a jw- my ex- she played the b.s. My kids saw my stand. Neither of them as adults are jw's.

  • freedom96
    freedom96

    Well Kelsey, that does give me hope!

  • kelsey007
    kelsey007

    freedom I have learned in life that doing things the right way may be the hardest and slowest way- and a bit more painful- but the outcome in the long run seems so much better.......

  • Rogue_Protecter
    Rogue_Protecter

    Freedom,

    IMHO thats is a descion ya should take time to consider for yourself..What works for others may not work for you..I see your point I was raised JW and if my parents had divorced and one left the truth I would have probably not have spent time with them..I have seen that happen to several people from the congregation I am from...Then the kids see the Org for what it is when there adults...and make up with the other parent...But it was hard on the kids and the Dfed one..and living far away as u said they will be brainwashed against you ..I would do whatever it takes to keep my children in touch even if it meant letting the elders believe I was just spiritually weak... But that is IMHO..Good luck in whatever you decide to do

Share this

Google+
Pinterest
Reddit