Below an excerpt of an interview to Dr. Myss.
RP: Can you talk about the concept of "woundology?"
CM: I was in an Indian restaurant in Scotland and was talking with two men friends when another friend I'd been waiting for came over. I introduced her to the two men, and while she was there, another man came over and asked her if she was free June 8th to attend a lecture. All he wanted to know was, "Are you free June 8th?" which requires essentially, a "yes" or a "no" answer. Instead, she went into this elaborate treatise about June 8th. "Did you say June 8th? No, no. Any other day, but not June 8th. That's an incest survivor's day and I have to be there because we never let each other down." She went on and on.
A half hour later, I asked her, "Why did you need to let those two men whom you have never met before know that you had; 1) experienced incest, 2) were still in therapy about it, 3) were angry about it, 4) were angry at men, and 5) needed to determine the course of the conversation—all within a twenty second introduction?" She replied, "Well, I am a victim of incest." And I said, "I know that. Why did you have to let them know that?"
Now here's where we go back to the tribal mind. I was asking her a conscious question which would come from my cologne water column. But she is operating by the tribal mentality of how to heal this wound. The tribe says, "You need a group." The tribe says, "You have a right to be angry." And that's when people get together in support group tribes.
It would never occur to her to say, "You're absolutely right. I've been processing this for 18 years and I think that's long enough." Or, "I'm going to forget them, take a look at what its taught me, move on and have a whole new life." Instead, she did the tribal thing which is, "You are challenging the way we think, and the way we've decided this wound should be healed." And I was excluded from the tribe. That was the first time I saw the fact that I was not sure that people wanted to heal.
In our culture, our first language of intimacy has become the language of wounds. In the old days, prior to this therapeutic age which is around forty-years-old, intimacy was the sharing of my first column [first, second and third chakra data]—where your family was from, family secrets, a mad aunt in the closet—that was considered intimate. Divorce and financial information was also considered very intimate. You never talked about yourself, only about what was going on.
RP: No one showed their feelings either.
CM: You didn't show your feelings because you didn't have individual feelings as such; your heart was a tribal instrument. And your journey was to mourn if the tribe was in grief, or to celebrate if the tribe had a good piece of news. It was the tribe that determined the content of your heart and its pulsation.
You can find the whole interview at: http://www.iamvalley.com/story display/story display.html?id=358