Moving on

by Introspection 34 Replies latest jw friends

  • Introspection

    I saw a recent post of someone leaving the board so they can move on. It's been years for me and I actually have never come to a board like this until recently. I'm just curious, how is everybody doing in that regard? I would imagine new ones need lots of support.

  • Gopher

    Hi Introspection,

    I don't know you yet, but I'd like to turn the question back to you---"How are you doing in the (moving on) regard?" It seems like you're OK and in a position to lend a hand to those who have "jumped ship" and are now "treading water" (sorry for the metaphor overload).

    In the WTS we were shown that there is a constant spiritual warfare between forces of good & evil. And those in the camp of "good" need constant encouragment to stand firm & wage their personal war to stay strong.

    So I'd say that those who have been out a while need not move on, but can stay here if they wish and provide voices that provide encouragement for those 'new ones who need lots of support' in their personal fight for freedom.

    Personally, this board has been a tremendous encouragment to me in the weeks I lurked and then finally joined in.


  • Introspection

    Yes Gopher, fortunately my transition was relatively gradual and at this point I have "moved on", which to me isn't about forgetting but letting it stay in the past. I don't think you need to leave a forum like this, in fact I do believe in processing the experience so it doesn't keep haunting you. I guess it's just a matter of not identifying with what is no longer our identity. I see each one as a brother and sister still, as a human being, not so much an exJW.

  • stephenw20

    Moving on is interesting, there is a great deal of "witnesses woundology" here...bonding onthe negative.....I am just as guilty of it as anyone .....but at some point whether its here or somewhere else, if we want wholeness...... we have to heal....the woundology must stop

    Its generally not a pretty journey, it may take a spiritual path or not, but rest assured , little if any genuine healing will happen without calling your spirit back from where it has been. Forgive the incident ,person,sitiuation and move forward. Its interseting in the lords prayer LOVE is not mentioned, forgiveness is.

    Its like paying a debt day after day and not realizing it We have the means to FORGIVE the debt and end it. Everyday that goes by without forgiving the past just adds another day of interest to it. Sooner or later our cell tissue that records all these things, says enough of this carrying the past and illness develops. We DONT control all of it by anymeans , but the memory aspect , is all us.

    I have found "Energy Anatomy", "Spiritual Madness, Spiritual Practice" and "Why people Dont heal " quite enlightening in this area.
    'Release victim
    consciousness and
    embrace forgiveness.'

    Caroline Myss


  • Gopher


    You are right in the sense that we need not wallow in our misery for years on end, defining ourselves for the rest of our earthly existence as ex-JW's and seeking sympathy, etc.

    But once we have gone far enough on our newly chosen "spiritual path", we have begun the healing process. HOWEVER,

    Notice the increase in the number of registered users at this site in just the past month or two! It's staggering. True, some are coming over from H20, but each day there seem to be multiple examples of newbies coming on board, looking for understanding, insight, whatever.

    So, for those of us who choose to stick around and lend a helping hand, we must "acknowledge the negative" experience that a new person on board brings -- perhaps with enough 'bonding' in that regard so that the newbie understands that we understand their concern! And then we help them begin their healing process.


  • stephenw20

    i fully agree with the helping hand after all its part of the command to love your neighbor......just that you should do the rest of the command as yourself.

    when you can hear all the stories of woe of the past and it no longer raises your bloodpressure...your there... its a commitment you make to your self to deal with things in a loving compassionate manor rather than holding on to negativity. This can of course be shared with the new ones that need the necessary venting period....

    just a thought

  • Sunchild
    I'm just curious, how is everybody doing in that regard?

    I think I'm doing okay. I left last February, and I seem to 've gotten over my Witness-isms (and general Xtian-isms) pretty well: fear of death, fear of life, fear of Jehovah and other cosmic boogeymen, the need to cram my beliefs, unasked for, down other people's throats, fear of simply being myself, etc. For the most part, my JW life is just a weird and distant memory. I've finally gotten to the point where it almost feels as though those 6-7 years never happened.

    I still like to hang around boards like this, though, even if I don't post much anymore. I like the company and different, interesting views, and if my former best friend is ever allowed to speak to me again, I'd like to get the news. I also like being helpful to newer escapees when I can.


    "Most men complacently accept 'knowledge' as 'truth'. They are sheep, ruled by fear."
    -- Sydney Losstarot, "Vagrant Story."

  • mustang


    I like your expression 'metaphor overload'. I did this recently and acknowledged my guilt as 'cliche-d to the max'. I may use your variant for further violations done to the Kings English.


  • Casper

    Feeling Guilty, Guilty, Guilty......!!!!! Does it ever go away..

    I find myself becoming a "Hermit" of sorts. Not wanting to go to
    town, the store or anything...for fear of running into them.. I am
    just in-active and beginning to make some serious decisions about
    what I want to do about being a JW.

    I worry about things, what "IF" I am making the wrong move, who
    do I pray to now...where to go from here... Will God do me in,
    Just everything........ But, I just can't live in a box any
    more...under a microscope..


  • Kristen

    I'm comfortable with the pace that I'm moving at. I still have many family connections in the organization, but feel more freedom in my heart than I've ever felt before. Of course, I haven't been interrogated yet, and suspect that could push me a lot further quicker.


    my bio

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