Well, folks, "mouthy" isn't telling you the whole story.
When I came out of JWs 8 years ago, I attended a few churches but was bothered by some of their teachings that I didn't agree with. Soon other ex-JWs found out about me and suggested that I attend some sessions with them that were held not far away. So, I did. And that's where I met "mouthy." She was like a mother hen with all us chicks -- rooster chicks and hen chicks -- discussing the Bible and praying together in such a happy way that it brought tears to my eyes. "Mouthy," often at her own expense and planning, arranged for all of us to have frequent meetings together where we could socialize, munch on little goodies and meatier dishes, and get our questions answered among ourselves. She and I and many of the others are still great friends. It's good she also supplied coffee, since we often stayed late into the night.
She knows I wasn't completely comfortable at first because there were some in the group who believed in the Trinity and others who didn't. In the back of my mind I thought some of them just had to be hypocrites to be calmly discussing the Bible together in the same room. In most discussions I had observed for many years, it was always like a mean-spirited wrestling match when trinitarians and non-trinitarians got together. We had a few lively sessions on the topic, but generally the atmosphere was ideal for people who were hurting and wanting to mend from the wounds the WT Society had given us.
If you're looking for a good church, I would say that the best you can possibly find anywhere is a group of ex-JWs who really love the Bible and who are willing to discuss it peacefully, being acceptable of the fact that we're all different, we're all growing at different speeds, and Christian love and kindness are much more important than accuracy of doctrine in any genuine fellowship.
I attend different churches in town, but I haven't settled on membership in any of them. I'm not against membership, however. I know some other persons who were long-time JWs but who have settled with their families into a community church (or Baptist, Wesleyan, Christian Reformed, etc.), and these people get great enjoyment from singing in the choir, helping the church with its printing needs, helping with the food kitchen, working with the Gideons or the Salvation Army, visiting the sick, etc. Some even share in giving sermons from time to time. Church is a great place to make new and lasting friendships for yourself and your family. It's also a great place for finding ways to show your genuine love for your neighbours in the community as well as for God.
Because of certain beliefs I hold in private, I stay away from churches where there is bound to be a conflict between them and my conscience. But I often find that some church people are eager to know what I believe and why. Church pastors have invited me to share my beliefs and to lead question and answer sessions, even when my teaching was very different from the church's statement of beliefs. Whenever I return to such churches, I'm almost always greeted by someone who draws me into a quiet corner where he or she can ask me some Bible questions that cry for an answer.
Another great place to hear extraordinary sermons is at a seminary or college where free lectures are given on religious topics. I've attended some really great ones on Christian history, creation and evolution, why many scientists believe in God, as well as some about Bible characters.
I also take a turn with pastors from several communities in holding church services at hospitals and nursing homes. We do this on Sunday afternoons around 2:30. And if you want to make hospitalized and elderly people really happy and grateful, just visit them and ask if they would like you to read something to them from the Bible. Whenever I do that, I go home knowing that my blessing that day was indescribable. They also appreciate other inspiring literature and items from the local newspaper. No need to tire them out. Just a brief visit is usually all it takes.
I also think it's good to contribute financially to churches that run hospitals and nursing homes and other community services for the benefit of the general public. That is something we never had opportunity to do as JWs, and we really missed out on a blessing because of it.
Thanks, "mouthy," for being among those who steered me in the right way when I was floundering a bit and not knowing what to do about my spiritual needs. I want you all to know that I do none of the above perfectly. I really doubt God expects that of you and me. But it deserves at least a try whenever we can. I do believe with all my heart that the happiest persons in the world are ex-JWs I know who love God and one another and also their neighbours in the community at large.
Frank
