Geez...hey lets ask the men how many of them still want to suck their MOTHER'S breasts....I think most men know the difference between their mom's and other women's breasts...if not well I think the problem lies deeper than a bit of extended breastfeeding in their youth...
Would You Like Milk with That Cookie?
by teenyuck 80 Replies latest jw friends
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BeautifulGarbage
very true, and who knows, maybe someday everyone will breastfeed until they go away to college. ridiculers are not always right, and i certainly understand your point. there are many degrees, and i suppose its all personal opinion. some people get ridiculed for having sex with animals, and it could be perfectly acceptable to someone else. yk gets constantly ridiculed for his armageddon predictions, as do the jws in general, but in the end they could be right too.
Whoa! Do you honestly believe that people having sex with animals COMPARES with a Mom breastfeeding her eight year old? I mean, that POOR animal! Come on, Dubla, "YOU KNOW" (sorry, couldn't resist) those comparisons are not even in the same league as the topic of this thread.
I asked the question and I will ask it again: What harm is being done to this child?
You see, this topic touches for me a broader subject of social conditioning and conformity. Ridicule, especially that is done publicly is a very powerful stick to bring down on the head of someone who is not conducting themselves within the dictated social norms. Now, that isn't always a bad thing. We all pretty much agree that murder of innocents is bad and should be ridiculed. Also, we agree that child molesters are a determent to society and such behavior should be punished severely. But, what about those behaviors that haven't been proven to be "bad" but still make the majority of us uncomfortable. There really aren't any compelling reasons WHY, they just do.
I offer for your consideration the following:
In Japan it is normal for whole families to bathe together. That's right, whole families seeing each other naked. Dads, Moms, brothers, sisters, naked...LOOKING AT EACH OTHERS BODIES. Yet, they don't seem to think it is a problem. But, here in the US, such behavior would be/is considered to be of a sexual nature and inappropriate in a family setting. Most likely the police and child protective services would be called. Why is that? Seems to me that Japanese kids and adults don't have the obsession with sex like we do here in the good ole US.
Because we have been conditioned to think that way.
Social conditioning:"Social conditioning is the process of instilling a culture's system of thought, beliefs, and body of doctrine in such a manner that it is, mostly, uncritically accepted."
I have an 11 year old daughter and I am confronted with this issue of social conditioning practically every darn day. Every week there seems to a new socially acceptable behavior that my daughter must meet, change, or discard. And these behaviors are at least in the same realm as the topic at hand.
Example: Shaving legs.Now, I admit I am a protective Mother. And to my daughters ire, one that does not bend easily to the unwritten social decrees of preadolescent girls. Still, I actually DO remember being that age and can sympathize her attempting to navigate the ever shifting sand world known as Middle School.
So, when she came to me wanting to shave off that "disgusting" hair off her calves, me, trying to get her to think perhaps a bit more deeply about why she desired so desperately to make her legs hair free, tried to reason with her as to why the hair on her legs wasn't so bad. That it wasn't "disgusting" it was just, HAIR. I went into the whole spiel about it being no different from the hair on her head, how women in other countries don't shave their legs, since she bathes regularly it certainly is not DIRTY. But, my lectures were an exercise in futility; she bought none of it. Why, you ask? Because of the ridicule she experienced from other girls at school. Let me tell ya, there is no ridicule more powerful than that of eleven year old girls. Indeed, I put up quite a struggle, but in the end, I allowed the kid to shave her legs. I tried.
Now, even mention to a group of men, and worse, WOMEN about females not shaving legs, or heaven forbid, ARMPITS, and I guarantee the "ewww" meter will be right off the graft. If you ask me, it should be the MEN shaving their armpits if it is cleanliness that is the primary concern. Again, we have been socially conditioned at to what constitutes femininity. But, that's another topic.
And so we have the eight year old breast feeding boy. And I ask again. Why is it so harmful? PLEASE SOMEONE TELL ME! If this was the only reason this child was removed from an otherwise nurturing home I hope she sues the pants off them!
Ah yes, the cutsie college comment. Hey! either he'll be the laughing stock of his college buddies, OR, maybe even the envy, eh? If there is ever a mystery of disappearing college jocks, we will all know the first place to look
Just so everyone knows. Yes, I shave my legs. No, I don't bathe naked with my family. And, NO, I don't and didn't breast feed my kids until they were eight years old.
I never said I was ABOVE the social conditionings. I merely question them.
Andee
Edited by - BeautifulGarbage on 31 October 2002 19:15:33
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WildHorses
BG,
I went through the whole shaving bit with Nikki just a couple of weeks ago. I won!!! I told her that she doesn't have that much hair as it is, and that the more she shaves, the more it will grow, and the thicker it will be.
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nilfun
I wonder what was the point in removing the child from his home?
He is still breastfeeding after being returned. Maybe someone just
wanted to make an example out of this mom...?
Even though I decided not to breastfeed my children til they were eight years old,
I have been the recipient of nasty looks and rude comments while I breastfed my babies.
A surprising amount of people think breasfeeding is disgusting, especially if it
is done in public. Too bad. I don't eat in public restrooms, and I won't allow anyone
to pressure me to feed my babies there either.
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shera
If a child is old enough to chew and drink out of a cup.Time to say bye bye to the boob.If you want your child to still have breast milk,pump it out.
Eight is too old to be on a breast.I think its a bit odd and sick.My son is seven and the thought of seeing his mouth on my breast ..is gross.
Someone metioned here,sorry I forget who it is,that if you are in a country where your child is starving,mabey you could look over that,but it would still be odd.
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dubla
xena-
I think most men know the difference between their mom's and other women's breasts
i think so too. i think most 8 yr olds do too.
bg-
Whoa! Do you honestly believe that people having sex with animals COMPARES with a Mom breastfeeding her eight year old?
no i dont.....no more than i think a child joining band compares with this subject.
aa
Edited by - dubla on 1 November 2002 9:19:7
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Shakita
I breastfeed 3 of my 4 kids.
I absolutely loved breastfeeding my babies! The closeness that develops between mother and child when they breastfeed is so precious! But, I did bottle feed my first baby, and that child was no less loved or bonded with!
Breastfeeding an 8 year old should be considered child abuse, IMO of course. This child will be forever remembering holding mommy's breast while sucking away at her nipple! This is absolutely and totally disgusting! Remember, I breastfeed my kids. The child will hold on to the breast while breastfeeding for long periods of time. This is just plain wrong!!!! This mother is abusing the privilege of feeding her children way long after the kid can feed himself!!!!
I personally remember a JW mom who still breastfed her child after she was 3 years old. Listen, if that kid has trouble fitting on your lap to feed, you need to STOP!! This child would reach into her mothers blouse trying to grab a hold onto her breast and pull it out to feed!!!!!!! It just utterly amazed me everytime I saw this!
Mrs. Shakita
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Angharad
I think that eight is waaaayyy to old to still be being breastfed, but at the same time I do think that it was wrong to take the kid into care - its the memory of being removed from his family over something that he grown up with that will cause the trauma and damage
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teenyuck
The story says:
But his babysitter thought differently and called a child-abuse hotline after Kyle then 5 years old and in the first grade allegedly said he wanted to stop breast-feeding but "Mommy wouldn't let me."
Now, a little over two years later, Kyle is back with his mom,and still nursing occasionally, although he is 8 years old. And his mother is speaking out about the controversy.
Stuckey says her son, now 8, still chooses to nurse occasionally. She says he does so every 10 to 14 days, just for a few moments each time.
Although she is not certain she is producing milk, her son says she still does occasionally, Stuckey said. And she says she sees nothing inappropriate about breast-feeding unless the child is "maybe into their teens."
The American Academy of Pediatrics says all but 18 percent of mothers in the U.S. have weaned their child by age 1. The World Health Organization says that children breast-feeding at 2, and even 3 years old, can be seen around the world. Neither of the health organizations give a cutoff date as to when a child should be weaned.
Diane Sanford, president of Women's Healthcare Partnership, said that in other cultures it is not uncommon for children to nurse until they are 3 to 6 years of age.
At the time, he nursed for about 10 minutes at night, and a little more on the weekends, she said.
The fact that an 8 year old is still nursing is wrong. With a mother who thinks that nursing is OK until "maybe into their teens", this kid is going to be in psycho therapy. Give him a thumb, a pacifier, a blanket....something. She should not be exposing her adult breasts to a child. If you think it is OK, do it to your children and see how well they like it.
From:
http://breastfeed.com/resources/articles/weanafter2.htm
Nursing Meets Different Needs for the Older ChildChildren that breastfeed to at least their second birthday continue to do so primarily for the comfort of breastfeeding rather then the nourishment. The physical need for breastmilk is not as great as it was during the first days, months or year. However, it can often become vital to a child's security or comfort to breastfeed, so toddlers and preschoolers may be reluctant to give it up.
Weaning an older child from the breast can be an adventure. However, with a little creativity, planning, comfort and reassurance, it can go smoothly for both the child and the mother. "Taking the time to listen as well as learn from what your child is telling you will offer wonderful clues to how weaning should be accomplished," says Prachniak. "A child this age can be very verbal about what they want or don't want. But, they are also old enough to listen and understand if it is explained in their language: love."
From all the articles I have looked at regarding breast-feeding, I came to the conclusion that having a child 8 years old, walk up, cuddle, take your breast and start sucking it IS WRONG!!!!!!!
No matter what the argument that "social pressure" turns breasts into sexual objects, the facts speak for themselves. They are sexual objects. And I for one am happy that they are. Women (and some men) like having their breasts sucked, played with, tickled, etc. For pleasure. For eventual sex. Ask how many women would give up all feeling in their breasts forever....as related to sex. The honest ones would say never.
Yes, they are a food source...and a very good one. However, that does not change the fact that breasts are sexual in just about every culture around the world. When a kid that age is getting mixed messages about what a breast is, he is going to need thearapy down the road to figure out why.
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dubla
teen-
With a mother who thinks that nursing is OK until "maybe into their teens", this kid is going to be in psycho therapy.
good reminder.....i think that fact has been lost in the shuffle. for those here that are (to some degree) defending this mothers actions, look at that statement. she thinks its fine to breastfeed until "MAYBE" the teenage years people! maybe, maybe not? you say theres no harm, its all social conditioning.....will you be saying the same when this kid is 15 and nursing? theres something wrong with this picture, and it goes WAY beyond social conditioning. how will his girlfriend feel about his nighttime "comfort" feeding.....still perfectly normal? come on, lets get real here.
aa
Edited by - dubla on 1 November 2002 14:3:15