Should JW's and Gays Be Allowed To Adopt?

by Englishman 23 Replies latest jw friends

  • Englishman
    Englishman

    This morning my nearest and dearest were discussing issues relating to adoption. A close relative of the family has been turned down as an adoptive parent because he and his wife are too wealthy!

    The adoption people say that it is important that children have some negative input into their lives, apparently not having money worries can be bad for you.

    We carried on talking and her ladyship asked me whether JW`s ever adopted children. I had to admit that I didn’t know the answer. Does anyone here have any knowledge about this?

    Following on with this thought, I wondered how people felt generally about adoption. Should gays be able to adopt? Or should only couples unable to have children because of sterility problems be able to adopt? Would the authorities in your country even consider letting JW's or gays adopt children? Conversely, does the WTBTS veto adoption?

    Englishman.

  • Gopher
    Gopher

    E'man,

    I don't believe the WTS vetoes adoption by its members.

    When younger, I had a friend whose JW parents adopted her & her older (non-related) "sister". This happened about 30 years ago.

    Gopher.

  • SanFranciscoJim
    SanFranciscoJim

    The key to adoption is whether the prospective parent(s) can supply the youngster with a loving, supportive environment.
    Although I knew many fine JW's who would have made delightful parents, I personally believe that involvement in a religion which keeps a stranglehold on its membership would exclude these parents from adoption, because external factors must be taken into account concerning the child's welfare, not the least of which is the parent's religious involvement.
    This goes as well for gays. Gay persons living in homophobic areas such as the "Bible belt" or the deep south should not, IMHO, be allowed to bring a child into an abusive exterior environment, even if the home itself is loving and supportive. On the other hand, I see nothing wrong with gay adoption by those living in major metropolitan areas so long as they can prove their ability to provide, not just financially, but emotionally as well.

  • larc
    larc

    In Ohio there has been a problem with white couples being able to adopt black children. Social Services which is comprised primarily of black employees make the agruement that the child would not experience their own culture. Unfortunately, these children would experience a very poor environment, in and out of ill run foster homes, because there are not enough qualified black families willing to adopt them. The issue varies from county to county, so that some qualified white families have had to look out side their immediate area to be able to adopt.

    In my opinion, there are just many black racists as there are white racists.

  • happytobefree
    happytobefree

    Larc,

    I usually enjoy your post, but I have to take exception to this comment......

    In my opinion, there are just many black racists as there are white racists.

    and on your statement about white couple adopting black children.

    I have worked in the construction field for my whole working career and know first hand what a rascist, sexist attitude encompass. And believe me there are not just as many black (hispanic, asian, indian, etc)racists as white american (don't know about other countries first hand). I'm not one to call wolf on the race card (yes I'm a black female), because I personally want to be judge on my merits and take any racist, sexist challenge head on, that's how I have been able to prosper in my chosen field. I have many friends (not acquaintances) that are white and have many times been apologetic to me for the behavior of white racist (which is not necessary because they are not responsible for an ignorant sob). I myself was raised in a all white environment in Ohio, 5 black, 2 asian and 1 hispanic in my high school population of 1500.

    And on the topic of white adopting black children. I understand the agrument to a point. I do think the white should be able to adopt black children, if they are educated on the defense mechanism required for black children (especially black men). And my white brother in-law who is raising a black male and female, understands this racism and know he has to teach his son about somethings that he is clueless about, and has said he is thankful that his children have strong black male models to help assist where he is lacking. But if whites are spewing such garbage as your above post, then HELL no, because those children would be living with a person who is not equipped to help them in the struggle they WILL face in this America.

    Happy to be Free (Me)

    And I know this is none of my business, but do you have any personal friends that are black.

  • larc
    larc

    Dear Happy,

    I hope you didn't think I meant the absolute numbers were the same. I was referring to the percents in each group. I thought that would be understood. You said that you went to a predominatly white school and your white friends apologized about the racism in their midst. You also asked me if I had any black friends. For the past 15 years, I worked out of town and had a second home there. I routinely went to the neighborhood bar that had a great deal more cultural diversity than your high school believe me. I remember that a white friend of mine was told by a black social services person, that he would have a better chance of getting welfare benefits if he were black. If that isn't racism, I don't know what is. Yes many of my freinds there were black. One nick named "Big John" sent his three daughters to a private school because of the poor quality of the schools in the hood. Another, named Morris told me about a case of police brutality he experienced which almost cost him his life. Another one was a very articulate former IBM salesman who started his own business. Another one was a nice guy, but was cheating on his wife with a married woman that came to the bar. Deedee was a quiet black woman who worked with the elderly. We danced to rock and roll songs several times at the bar. No one of either race ever questioned us about it. I aslo have heard the stories of the white boys in the hood and what it was like growing up in a black school.

    Those are a few of the blacks I know. Also, I have three children. My youngest daughter married a black man. My son married a black women, and sister's only daughter married a black man. Based on what I have told you, I think I can tell prejudice in either race when I see it.

  • happytobefree
    happytobefree

    Larc,

    I'm sorry if my post came across as harsh and put you on the defense. After reading your response and rereading my post, I must apologize for putting you on the spot. But the racism issue is something that I work to educate and fight against daily because of my chosen occupation and also because I live with four wonderful black men who also feel the burden of rasism daily.

    But I will have still have to disagree with you on the percentage per the individual groups. Because blacks or any of the other groups cannot and do not make up the norms or policies for racism. And I personally can count the number of times on one hand where I have seen blacks directly do anything that would hinder another's progress.

    But thanks for the clarification.

    Happy to be Free (Me)

  • larc
    larc

    Happy,

    I think the Black Muslims is an examle of racism. When I walked through a city park and a group of blacks asked me what I am doing in their park, that's another example. When a ten year old black kid gives me the finger, when I'm driving down a city street, that's another one. When a black gang makes it a requirement to kill a white person to get in, that's another. This happened to my neighbor's nephew. He was shot in the head while his car was stoped at a red light. On the last post, I told you good stuff in my experiences. Here is some of the racist stuff. One other one, when I was told by a black executive of a city program, that they were promoting a black from within, even though I had a better background for the job, that's racism. When they laid off the white males and kept the females and blacks on a job I had, that's reverse discrimination. My manager got a large bonus for following the corporate directives in this matter.

    As I said before, it cuts both ways.

  • Kismet
    Kismet

    Happy:

    Based on your response to Larc I cannot help but wonder if you are in fact too close to the situation to make an unbiased observation about the general problem of rascism?

    Over the past few years I have been noticing more and more acts of intolerance and racial discrimination on the part of some in the Asian and Black communities. Did the caucasions bring this upon themselves? Perhaps if it was limited to such acts against just the white community.

    I have been observing asians being rascist against anyone non-Asian, and have been hearing more and more comments from blacks regarding anyone not black.

    Racism is not exclusively a white male's problem. It is an illness and social pariah that can infect anyone, regardless of race or color of skin. I think percentage wise it is impossible to say which group is more prejudice.

    The world community has taken some great steps forward in equality but I am afraid things in North America are rapidly progressing in the wrong direction.

    My 2 cents.

    Kismet

  • Kismet
    Kismet

    On the topic of adoption, I have mixed feelings.

    My nephew who I adore and would do anything for is adopted. My sister and her husband are active JW's and in fact I assisted in the whole adoption process.

    Now however I fear for his indoctrination into the JW's. Would I ever say they should never have been allowed to adopt? No. My sister and her husband are good parents. They love care for and take care of that little guy as if he was their own.

    I certainly think their home is better than anything this child would have experienced in foster care.

    I feel teh same way about same sex couples. If they can provide the caring stable home environment a child needs, this is far better alternative than never being part of a family.

    Kismet

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