Before you read the following. I would like to explain that I in no way hold the Jehovah's Witness beliefs, so please read the complete thought to fully understand my point. I spent so much of my life wondering what would happen if Armageddon came tomorrow, would I make it. I looked at all these people that were elders, Pioneers, and strong Witnesses and figured I did not measure up. I always thought, if I could only spend more time in service, write better talks, perhaps work at Bethel and even donate more money to the society. I would be equal to these people and would make it into the New World we always talked about. When I left the religion, and started to learn about the universe and about how little works really mattered I came to a realization and visualization of what a Armageddon would really be like. I take you into a dream ... The sky grew dark and the smell of death filled the air. Screams of pain could be heard in the distance as the judgment of life approached them. The fire was burning everywhere, and people were running in a complete panic, as they wondered what was happening. I stood there thinking that this must be it, I blew it. Armageddon was here and I was about to die, the Witnesses must have been right and here comes the end I never thought would be possible. The radio station was playing something about weird events world wide, and people dying everywhere and then it went silent and I realized the announcer too at been taken by the wrath of God. I set at the edge of my yard and cried a few tears thinking, why would God be this way? Why would God have had a religion with so much hate represent him? I put my head in my hands and set there wondering when my end would come, and how much pain would it involve. The smell of smoke and burning flesh was everywhere, and it was making me ill. I decided I would at least walk to the Kingdom Hall and see what was happening there. I expected to see people singing and all gloating with a "we told you so attitude." I started to walk down the street and stood across the street from the Kingdom Hall. It seemed quiet enough, with people standing around looking as scared as me. I figure they were worried that some of them would drop dead soon, and I figured they were now questioning every moment they ever had in this life. Suddenly I stood quiet, as I felt them approach. It was as if I felt the energy of something not of this world behind me, and even though they did not breath, there was a breath to their presence. I turned and I saw what looked like shadows, or silhouettes and I thought "well at least at the end I got to see the face of my killers." I hit the ground, not to beg, but to die saying sorry. Suddenly a voice spoke and said, "what are you doing?" It came from the figures. I looked up and said, "I figured you were here to take me out of this world to be destroyed." The figures did not speak for what seemed like a hour, but then they said, "what have you done to deserve to die?" Which caught me off guard, I always wondered my whole like "what have I done to deserve to live" and never once thought about the other question. I stood there silent and caught off guard. I then thought of something, "I have done nothing, I loved everyone including myself and I always wanted to do what was best ... I spent my life helping others from my heart and I never harmed anyone that did not deserve it." .... I paused a minute and spoke again "I loved life, I loved every minute and everyone who spent it with me ... I have no regrets." I felt strong at that moment and figured, if this was the end ... I felt good about me. The figures took a long moment to speak again, "well you found the answer to life then, you need to know why you deserve to live and not think about how much you need to die." Then he paused again, and I noticed more energy creatures were with them. They all spoke loud to me at this point, "could you do us a favor though?" I thought, "well sure" these creatures were letting me live when I thought life was over and the judgment I feared was upon me. I spoke up with a unusual strength for the moment I was in, "what ever you want!" They spoke again, even louder, "could you move, we are trying to take aim." So I stepped down the street and suddenly the Kingdom Hall went up in flames and all the people were all destroyed. The elders who I thought were so holy at one moment in my past, the Pioneers who seemed so righteous in all their works, and all those families that said I was never doing good enough. They were now all gone, nothing but ash and flames where the Kingdom Hall once stood. As I walked home, I did not notice that many other churches were laying in ash as well. I just noticed that I had a smile on my face, for I no longer feared a Armageddon or angels, or even a God. I did not deserve to die!!!! I deserved to live!!! So I went home and felt happy, that I had a tomorrow. I had the right to see myself there, and I had the right to want to be there and I did not have to feel guilt for those feelings. All those who would have told me I was wrong, were now ashes on the street corner ... blowing in the flames and wind of destruction. So I ask all of you, "do you deserve to die, or do you deserve to live?" Which question did you ask yourself today? My thought Dragon
Edited by - kenpodragon on 26 September 2002 15:47:48