Hubby has Cancer.........

Golden Girl

And my heart is breaking!..We just had it confirmed today. He has 9 months to live so they say.

Among all the heartbreak and pain he is crying and begging me to go to the Kingdom Hall with him. He said that is the only way we can be togeher in the "New System".

Has any on here been through something like this? Did you join a Cancer support group? We have a option of Chemo but that may only prolong his life some.

I don't know how to handle this! He gets paniky and I don't know what to do. I want to be with him as much as possible but it is killing me thinking of going to the hall with him and acting like I want to be there!

I dissasociated myself in 1975!..but I love him so much I would do that for him . I want him to be as happy as he can be for his remaining time!

I just had to post this. I have talked to friends and relatives but it is so hard to do without crying! By posting it here I can cry while I type.

Thank you for listening to me. This is so fresh it is still a shock. We can't believe it is happening. He has aways been healthy and never smoked or drank. Now he has Lung cancer that has spread to his liver.It is inoperable.

Several of the witnesses came in to see him. I also found out a witness I knew a long time ago was dying from cancer also. She was in the hospital at the same time.

Then her husband was talking to me (He is also a witness)and he just found out HE had cancer. Too much. I feel like it is too much!

Golden Girl...aka..Snoozy..................

Dutchie

((((Golden Girll))))

My husband also died from an incurable disease last year and at the time I had stopped going to the Kingdom Hall. One of his last requests was that I attend the Memorial with him, his last one ever, and I went. I went for no other reason than to show my love and respect for him.

The decision is a hard one, I know. Do what is in your heart. My prayers are with you. Love, Dutchie

Edited by - Dutchie on 12 September 2002 0:56:34

Beck_Melbourne

Sorry about your news Golden Girl

I personally would go for his sake, and give him the peace he is seeking. This may sound a little bit deceptive...but it may make a difference later when he is gone, you may look back with no regrets.

I'm so sorry you have to go through this.

(((((Golden Girl and Hubby)))))

Beck

ronin1

Dear Golden Girl:

I am so sorry to hear about your husband.

If you can, try to go with him at least on Sundays. He really does need you and anything that will make him feel better will help you to feel better.

My father died of inoperable pancreatic cancer; they gave him 6 months to live and he died within 5 months. Whatever he wanted to do, we tried to help him and make him as comfortable as ever.

Also, please look into Hospice care. It is the greatest care for terminally ill patients and they really do help the family a lot.

Christian Love and Prayers,

Ronin1

Joyzabel

((((((((((Golden Girl)))))))))))

I am so sorry to hear of your news and the major crisis in your family.

Listen to your heart and whatever you do, do it out of love.

Keep us posted and we are here to help support you.

j2bf

Big Tex

Snoozy I am so sorry to hear this. This is terrible news and I feel awful for you. Do you have any support for you? I don't know anything about support groups, although I think it's a good place to start. Take care . . . .

Tanalyst

GG-

You may have to reprogram yourself to sit through those meetings, I''m sure life will be less stressful for your hubby though if you join him. Perhaps there's some NLP tapes from your library you can check out to help you.

As for as 9 months goes Drs.can be way off. A year ago a Dr. visited me from Asia. One of his patients had been told by the DR. at the hospital to go home and die since they couldn't do anything for her cancer.The visiting Dr. told me he kept her alive for another 15 yrs.

I saw a cassette tape awhile ago, about beating cancer through visualization. God be with you & family.

Xandria

((( HUGS Golden Girl ))),

As a survivor of losing several people to cancer, I suggest that you do join a support group. HOSPICE was wonderful to us each time we used their services. They gave a bit of relief and support when we were caring for our loved ones. They wanted to be at home and not at the hospital when they passed. If I only could of done that with my mother that would of been wonderful. But she was in the hospital.

You may want to take this time ( I know you are in shock and unfortunately Cancer doesn't wait for any of us to come to terms with many things). To help him prepare his affairs and spend as much time together. Those memories are going to help you through. HUMOR is WONDERFUL it helps all around. Chemo is a personal choice, many have to make that choice to be sick through all this "time" period that was given for them to live or to die as normal as the cancer allows.

Chemo the chances are slim if it has already massed in the blood, and spread to other organs. This is something you may want to discussed with your husband and doctor. An see if there is a chance for battling this. Always get a second opinion if you are not sure.

Golden Girl don't think you have to be super person either.. I went through that. You are allowed to go through anger and the whole gammit of emotions that are going to be coursing through this time.

Shock, Denial, Anger, Pleading and Bargaining with God, Withdrawal, Sadness, and even acceptance are all going to be a part of this.

So (((HUGS)) just know we are here even if it is just to listen.

Xandria

Edited by - xandria on 12 September 2002 1:55:19

LyinEyes

GoldenGirl, so very sorry to hear this tragic news . I send my love and hugs to you and your hubby. I can imagine the choices you have to make right now. Go with your heart ,,,,,,,,,,, I bet you will know what to do, even if it is a spur of the moment choice. If it were me,,,, I would probably go along with him if it made his last days happier and more at peace, but that is just me, only you can know what is right for you and him. This is too heartbreaking and I wish I could make it go away for you two. I wish I had the power. All I can do is send you my love , my thoughts and please keep us posted on how things are going. You need all the support you can get,,,,,,,,, you can turn to us anytime you need to talk. We are like family here and want to support you. Sending all my love and hugs...... Dede

sunshineToo

{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{GG and your hubby}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}

I am so sorry about your situation. If that is his last wish, I would go to the KingdomHall for him. But that's just my idea. Do whatever you want to do. I'll be praying for you and your husband.

Hubby has Cancer.........

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