Nikita's Story! It was a time long ago...the drama

by Nikita 26 Replies latest jw experiences

  • JenGill97
    JenGill97

    Great story... and great name! (It's my daughters name... see pic to the left!)

    Jen :)

  • BugParadise
    BugParadise

    Thanks for reposting your story Nikita! It must be a big comfort having family that is so supportive! Hugs!

  • Cassiline
    Cassiline

    (((((((( Leslie )))))))

    Thanks for sharing I missed it the first go round. Thanks Mr. Biggs for helping your sister find her way here.

    Hopefully with the both of you out perhaps you can help others in your family out as well. If not knowing you have the support of each other and friends must be wonderful.

    hugs to you both,

    Cassi

  • Beck_Melbourne
    Beck_Melbourne

    Nikita/Leslie

    Thanks for reposting your story again, it was really interesting...I love reading more about people after I have come to know them a bit better.

    I look forward to reading more of your posts and hearing more about your family.

    Beck whispering "I think your brother is hot" LOL

  • Cassiline
    Cassiline

    I heard that Beck.... all the way over here in America!!!

  • Nikita
    Nikita

    Thanks to all who responded!

    out-

    But that fear of Armageddon

    Boy, do I recall what that felt like! I had those doubts for a while after I drifted away. I am forever counting my blessings that I didn't make the mistake of marrying into the "Truth." It just saddens my heart to see what some of you have had to go (or are currently going) through.

    Karen-

    I know that I was emotionally damaged, probably long before I ever became a JW (when I was fourteen). Becoming part of the borg just kept me in the subserviant, low self esteem lifestyle that I knew so well. I wanted to belong, to feel a part of things, but I felt so separate, so different. I didn't know what "normal" was

    I have felt that way too. I don't know what it was that triggered the feelings of low self-esteem, but you described how I felt, sometimes still feel so well.

    Jen-

    Which name is your daughters-Nikita or Leslie? I love my name, Leslie, but had to go "undercover" when I first came to help keep Mr. Biggs identity quiet. I've always liked the name Nikita especially after I got hooked on the tv show "la femme nikita."

    Bug-

    Yes, it has been great getting reacqainted with Mr. Biggs! I never dreamed the day would come when we would have an open brother/sister relationship again! And Quincy is my baby bro' he's a sweetheart! We still have one more brother in, and he is heavily indoctrinated. Maybe one day we'll see him posting here-I can dream, anyway!

    Cassiline-

    Thanks for the hugs! Yes, as I mentioned above it is great to have our relationship back. The emotions I had from when he first reached out to me-I can't explain! I had a hard time sleeping for days! It made my Dad cry tears of joy. (He was never in, but saw how the dynamics of us all being in ripped our family apart.)

    Beck-

    I always enjoy reading other peoples stroies as well.

    And yes, Mr. Biggs is hot and so are Quincy and Badwillie!

    Thanks again!

    Hugs to all of you!

    Leslie/Nikita

  • BeautifulGarbage
    BeautifulGarbage

    Leslie,

    Thanks for reposting your story. I know only too well that burning desire to be "normal". Funny thing about my discovery about "normal". I'm not. I never will be. It seems to be a combination of my upbringing, temperment, and my way of viewing things. Throw in a warped sense of humor, and what do ya got?

    Well, I'm not sure there is a name for it, but it is what I turned out to be.

    No longer do I try to fit any mold. I'm just ME. And everyone else can take it or leave it.

    Glad that you and Mr. Biggs have each other.

    Andee

  • Nikita
    Nikita

    Hi Andee! Thanks for your post.

    Funny thing about my discovery about "normal". I'm not. I never will be. It seems to be a combination of my upbringing, temperment, and my way of viewing things. Throw in a warped sense of humor, and what do ya got?

    Found this quote:

    "Character cannot be developed in ease and quiet. Only through experience of trial and suffering can the soul be strengthened, ambition inspired, and success achieved." Helen Keller

    and this:

    "The ultimate measure of a man is not where he stands in moments of comfort, but where he stands at times of challenge and controversy." Martin Luther King, Jr.

    In the end we all have to look ourselves in the mirror and accept the fact we are a character of our own making. I'm still workin' on that!

    I admire you Andee for your healthy attitude!

    Nikita

  • siegswife
    siegswife

    I didn't get to read your story before so I'm glad you reposted it.

    I too can relate to wanting to feel normal. I never felt like I fit in anywhere for a long time before I became a witness and awhile after I left. I didn't really start to feel normal until I realized that 'normal people' are as screwed up or screwier than I am. LOL

    After that realization, I stopped worrying about fitting in with a bunch of misfits and *presto* began fitting right in.

  • Nikita
    Nikita

    Thanks siegswife!

    I realized that 'normal people' are as screwed up or screwier than I am. LOL

    So true!

    Nikita

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