Last week my niece died in a car crash. She was only 18 years old. I haven't seen her since she was 10. I missed her all that time. Now I miss her even more. I wish I could have said goodbye, but I was forbidden to talk to her. I didn't have enough time to go to her funeral. It was halfway across the country and I had less than 24 hours notice. I was allowed to send flowers.
I went to work today, thinking that work would help keep me busy and keep my mind off of the tragedy. It didn't. Halfway through the day I talked to my boss and took bereavement leave. So now I am home, thinking a lot, crying a lot, and trying to keep busy around the house. I try to find joy in the simple things and appreciate being alive, because you never know how short it will be.
When I went to my first funeral, I was about 10. My grandmother had died. My grandfather bawled. My brother and I started crying too, but my great grandmother and my mother told us to hush up because it would give a bad witness. We were told that it showed a lack of faith to cry at funerals and that we should be strong to show unbelievers our faith in the resurrection.
Why is that? Did any of you encounter this pressure not to grieve? In Ecclesiastes chapter 3 it talks about there being a time to weep and mourn. If wise King Solomon says it's okay to cry and grieve, why is it frowned upon or seen as a lack of faith to sincerely express those emotions at a JW funeral?
Just one of the many things that has been on my mind today as I reflect.