Year 2035 Headlines

by Scorpion 19 Replies latest social humour

  • Scorpion


    Ozone created by electric cars now killing millions in the seventh
    largest country in the world, California.

    White minorities still trying to have English recognized as the
    California's third language.

    Spotted Owl plague threatens northwestern United States crops & livestock.

    Baby conceived naturally ... Scientists stumped.

    Authentic year 2000 "chad" sells at Sotheby's for $4.6 million.

    Last remaining Fundamentalist Muslim dies in the American Territory of
    the Middle East (formerly known as Iran, Afghanistan, Syria, and Lebanon)

    Iraq still closed off; physicists estimate it will take at least ten more
    years before radioactivity decreases to safe levels.

    Castro finally dies at age 112; Cuban cigars can now be imported legally,
    but President Chelsea Clinton has banned all smoking.

    George Z. Bush says he will run for President in 2036.

    35 year study: diet and exercise is the key to weight loss.

    Texas executes last remaining citizen.

    Upcoming NFL draft likely to focus on use of mutants.

    Average height of NBA players now nine feet, seven inches.

    Microsoft announces it has perfected its newest version of Windows so it
    crashes BEFORE installation is completed.

    New federal law requires that all nail clippers, screw-drivers and
    baseball bats be registered by January 2036.

  • mevirginia

    Thats funny but there is no mention of what the JWs will be doing

  • Scorpion


    You are right, there is no mention of what the JWs will be doing. I guess that leaves this post open for some good ideas as to what JWs will be doing in the year 2035.

    Here's a start: Watchtower Bible & Tract Society use printing presses to publish 'MAD Magazine'.


  • mevirginia

    ummm...what would Rutherford look like on the cover of Mad Magazine?

  • Reborn2002

    The first thought that came to my mind is the Watchtower Bible & Tract Society is not mentioned because they no longer exist 30 years from now.

    With the general populace growing ever more cynical, and having better access to information via the Internet, and the general disdain for organized religion that seems to be growing.... it is NOT impossible to fathom.

    Not to mention, with one HUGE scandal breaking and a lawsuit that liquidates thier financial assests..

    HASTA LA BYE BYE Jehoogers Witless Freaks.

  • mevirginia

    Reborn are you trying to destroy a perfectly good goofball thread by being reasonable?

  • Scorpion

    mevirginia ummm...what would Rutherford look like on the cover of Mad Magazine?

    You need RealPlayer for this. Give it a minute to load.

  • mevirginia

    LOL You could have at least given a warning.

  • ozziepost

    In 2035, will be operated from Patterson, and Simon jnr will be forced to re-name his father's site "The Apostate"


  • StinkyPantz

    Uh, Scorpion that was gross. . hehe

Share this