Letters to my daughter: PART 2

by witchywoman 14 Replies latest jw experiences

  • witchywoman
    This is the response from my daughter to the letter that I sent to her which you can view in "Letters to my daughter -- Part 1". I choose not to use her conversation, but I will paraphrase it. Subject: Your point of view She did thank me for sharing that with her.

    She also expressed a wish for me to keep the agreement we made to each other.

    Also seemed to her that I was insistent on pushing her away.

    Mary _________________________________________________________________________________ This is my reply to her:

    Subject: Re: Your point of view You now know how I feel. I don`t see how that is pushing you away. Do you mean away from me? Perhaps someday I will be able to speak candidly with you.Too bad for me. I WILL do my best to keep our agreement. I will continue to remain positive in my life and try my best to have peace in my heart. Love you always, you are my sweet darling daughter. Mom Please no emotional blackmail, it will no longer work. _______________________________________________________________________________ This will be harder to paraphrase, I hope to convey her stance with the WTBTS. There was a thank you for my note. She assumed full responsibility for our communication going downhill. Her expression is one of loving me very much. She has made the affirmative to do her utmost to give no emotional blackmail as I would be trying as best as possible to keep our agreement.

    She is happy to hear that I am doing my all to have peace in my heart. She did affirm that I was trying to push her away from me. And does not desire any more candid talk. She said that I had explained myself very clearly and does know where I stand on the matter. She made the statement that we have many more things in common to share.

    When she was "blackmailing" she could only say that it was unitentional and did not desire for it "to work." She has stated that she wants what makes me happy, whatever I CHOOSE for my life. Her expression, she knows that I want the same for her.

    Mary _______________________________________________________________________________ I suppose that I should have called this "Letters from my daughter". My main reason for sharing these letters is for people that are shunning, and for people who are reading, to see and feel the pain that is inflicted with this practice. My daughter and I are begining to bridge the huge gap that was caused by this religion. It has taken over ten very long (for me) years for us to get to this place. I am not sure why she is willing to have a mom/daughter relationship with me. She may one day let me know what has changed her mind. For now I am not going to question it, and she knows that I was always here. To anyone that is being shunned and locked out of your loved ones life, don`t give up. Throw yourself in there and give them a call. Send a present. What ever the hell you want to do to let them know that you love them. Don`t be surprised or upset if you get a coldness, or no response. Never forget that they love you too. The problem is that they are being influenced by a destructive cult. One that does not have feelings about tearing people away from the ones that they love and need the most, and will continue to love and need throughout their lives. witchywoman
  • Vivamus


    I am glad to read that your daughter is getting back in touch with you. The Borg does have a lot to blame when it comes to broken relations and the hurt that caused it, don't they? As to the question of why your daughter wants her relation back with you? well, we daughters want our mommys. Even when things aren't great with parents, we still want them and need them. So hang in there Witchy, you are a loving person and have great motherly skills .

    I hope all turns out well.


  • Sentinel


    Thanks for the email to let me know you posted the second part. I haven't been on here too much in the past week, but am feeling better today. I really appreciate your post here. I think it will be helpful to others who are going through similar experience. The way you broke it down was easy to follow.

    You are so right when you say that all we can really do is LOVE with all our heart. We can't give up hope that somehow their eyes will be opened to enlightenment. I hope that your daughter will begin to question for herself. That is the key. She knows how you feel, and you know how she feels. Now you probably should just agree to disagree--all things in love.


  • witchywoman

    Today at about 3:00 Central time I had a conversation with my daughter. She has changed her stand and again wants to keep distance between herself and me. She no longer wants to chit chat through e-mails, and does not want to be close. I am deeply hurt. I know it will pass, but for now the pain is deep.

    I must take a moment to thank the Watchtower Bible and Tract Society for my daughters stand, and the gap that was closing has once again become a canyon. Be careful WTS the pain you are sowing will return to you 100 fold. I only pray that I will be alive to see it.


  • BeautifulGarbage


    I'm sorry to read of your daughter's latest stance. The WTS's deplorable practice of shunning has hurt my family, deeply, also.

    With the August KM, the nonjw side of the family, at this point, is not sure what to expect from our JW relatives. Ever so slowly the two sides were beginning to come together after 20 years of shunning. For certain "we" were clear that it would never a "normal" family, but at least there would be some contact. However, a spellbound JW is beholdened to the old men in Brooklyn. The shifting sands of doctrine just do not allow for any kind of relationship based on love, mutual caring, and trust.

    Right now, we have accepted that we all stand on quick sand with our JW family. At any point, the ground of which it is built upon can become unstable. So, we do not invest ourselves too deeply emotionally. It makes exchanges superficial, but we accept that. We also are prepared to be cut off again.

    If this were my daughter, I would just keep telling her I love her dearly and always want only the best for her.


  • witchywoman

    ((Beautiful)) Thank you. It is exhausting being hurt this way. I know with the current KM I should have seen this coming. I know that it did not come out of the blue. Still hurts like shit though. We weren`t as close as we once were, but we were on our way.

    Thanks for trying to cheer me up.

    WTS, all of the loving provisions from you are blessings beyond compare.

    There is where [your] weeping and gnashing of [your] teeth will be, when you see Abraham and Isaac and Jacob and all the prophets in the kingdom of God, but you youselves thrown outside.--Luke 13:28.

    This scripture is a parable in answer to a question asked to Luke about who was wothy to enter into the kingdom of heavens. This scripture has no correlation to throwing people out of the christian congregation, or for that matter, breaking close family ties.


  • Nikita



  • witchywoman

    Thank you (((Nikita))). I can use a hug.

    In recollection of many talks in the KH references were made to the sequoia trees and all there grandure and strength. Imagine a small ant being able to bring one of marvelous trees down. In these talks mention was made that it would not happen right away but might take many years. Lots of little ants eventualy can damage the root structure of that tree and bring it down.

    WTS, are you feelin it? If not now, oh, you will.


  • lisaBObeesa


    Thinking of you,


  • witchywoman

    Thanks (((((Lis))))) that means a lot to me right now. You just don`t know. I just need some time.

    and quit sharing with [them] in their unfruitful works that belong to the darkness , but rather, even be reproving [them], for the things that take place in secret by them it is shameful even to relate, --- Eph.5:11,12 NWT


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