by Frenchy 44 Replies latest jw friends

  • Seven

    Thanks guys, but you'll not get rid of me that easy. I'll be back tonight. I took some vacation time to wallpaper and work around the house.lol I've never been riding so this should be interesting. See you all tonight.

  • Roamingfeline


    With everything you know.. what stopped you from walking out?

    My sympathies on the position you found yourself in with that elderly sister. Poor woman. That is truly a sad sad story.

  • marion_nett

    Frenchy - You are a very kind, reasonable person. I have to admit the "what-ifs" have crossed my mind regarding my son (i.e., what if he should die in an accident - who would do the funeral). He has many friends who would attend, and, yes, it would look very bad. I am thinking someone might do a generic funeral talk - you know, about the resurrection and paradise, etc. (Not very personal or satisfying, but better than refusing altogether!) I would think that would be a conscience thing ... no?

    Anyway, good for you for being there for her!

  • RedhorseWoman


    ALL of the funeral talks are generic. I was very upset at the funeral talk for my mother. She had been a faithful Witness for over 40 years. Her last 18 months were spent in a nursing home (during which time none of the elders from several congregations ever visited her...but that's another story).

    I told the elder who was to give the funeral talk about some small things that had happened during Mom's hospitalization that showed her personality...her love of life even in adversity...her sense of humor. The brother used NONE of this information. Although he and his wife had presumably been fairly close to Mom before her stroke, his talk barely acknowledged Mom's existence. It was a generic resurrection/paradise talk all the way.

    I don't think I have ever felt so empty. My Mom was cremated, as was my Dad, and we buried their ashes together in my Dad's rose garden. Our family held a small, private memorial service for each of them with just the immediate family. I'm glad we did that. Our private service was much more personal and did much more to give us closure. We each spoke about my parents' lives and what they meant to us.

    The funeral talk at the Hall was simply another talk....there was no comfort in it.

  • waiting


    I truly am surprised that any witnesses came to the funeral of a disfellowshipped person - no matter the pain almost killed the old woman.
    After all, principles are at stake - damn the heart.

    On another website, there is an article about a JW family whose very young daughter needed a blood transfusion. Court order was given - the child lived - for about 4 more years. The father, and perhaps mother were disfellowshipped. When their daughter finally died, no one from the Kingdom Hall came. What could they say to the grieving parents? They were dead in their eyes.

    I know the cases are not the same, but similar. We can be so cruel to the grieving heart.

    Dear Red Horse, I've seen you talk about your mother before, and you're right about generic funeral talks. But we're a generic religion, right? Go ride your horses and forget for a while.

    Edited by - waiting on 14 June 2000 22:10:41

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