by VioletAnai 21 Replies latest jw friends
That I am TJ. You guys don't realize what an effect you have on me. I take absolutely everything on board that is said here and mull it over and mull it over and mull it over.....
Processed, pulped, moulded and repackaged with Vi's perspective (which I know doesn't always make sense!)
I was an unhappy borg for 30 years. (Istill feel like a dumbo).
To break out of the walls and clutches of the watchtower is no small deal.
I still sometimes have trouble to follow up the advice of the below Awake!
And then sometimes the eery thought crawls into my mind:"What if they do have the Truth?
Am I not then taking my kids away from Paradise? I wouldn't want to do that.
At that moment I start thinking. In the beginning I was so convinced. I pioniered, became MS, bookstudy conductor.
When they asked me to become an elder, I chose not to be one. This was in the mid seventies.
I was a righteous man, came up for the underdog, the brothers and sisters who were having a hard time.
Many, if not most were having hard times, including me.
Slowly I was getting more and more resistance, the more I wanted to do things for the R & F.
I have seen the brothers and sisters suffer and I still see them suffer.
The more I wanted to do for the brothers and sisters, the more I came up for them the more resistance I felt from the elders and the WT Society.
This I could not understand, nor comprehend and conflicted severely in my mind, causing outbursts, etc, which in the end cost me my marriage and family.
The question then finally starts arising if an Organisation which is from God, with righteousness and justice and especially love in mind could cause such misery, and always blaming me, while I'm doing my utmost best to do it their way.
In 1999 I finally said to the elders, that there has to be something wrong with their teachings. 30 years I tried it your way and now it's enough. And then rises the question of the below Watchtower.
Since those days I feel that I have grown. I can now see where things went wrong and what the WT really is.
Whatever they are, I don't know, but one thing I do know.
They are definitely not God's Organisation.
Someone who has love, has compassion for us.
I did not find it in their leadership. I did from the R & F, and I still think there are many of them whom are very good people.
I advise them to take a good look at their religion
My son (13) is now finally starting to ask about this board and I hope to welcome him here after a while.
This is absolutely worth a compliment to this board.
So get with it. Freedom is Great. Don't lock yourself up within those gloomy walls of depression within the traumatized
Watchtower Society
The sun is shining and the grass is green. You have your Freedom and the future holds infinite possibilities, all for your taking.
Free at last.
