NEW EXJW ON THE BLOCK

by buffy 27 Replies latest jw friends

  • buffy
    buffy

    Hi all. You can read my bio to find out a little about me. Basically, I need support. Even after two years, I still think
    about going back to being a JW. I was happy being disfellowshipped at first, even though I had lost my family
    because of it (which I cried about every night), I eventually realized that I never was a witness because I wanted to be,
    I was one because my mother wanted me to be. Which we all know is not a good reason to be a JW. I know that I
    really do love my life, my husband, and my son. But, I worry now more than ever, because of my son. What if
    because I rejected Jehovah and die, he does too. He's just a baby. How do I move on from this line of thinking?
    I could never go back. I couldn't quit smoking and associating w/ my friends. I love bartending, and going out dancing
    every now and then. I couldn't change my lifestyle for rules that are ridiculous. I guess I still believe in what I was
    taught. I don't think I could ever even go to a church. I get a guilty feeling when I decorate for Christmas. My husband
    has no idea what I'm thinking or feeling, I need people who've been there. HELP!!

  • safe4kids
    safe4kids

    Hi Buffy and welcome to the forum

    So much of what you are feeling is what many of us have gone through or are still going through. I've been out for about 4 years. I have 2 kids and I used to have nightmares about what would happen to them because of me. Eventually, I worked through all of my fear and am no longer plagued by nightmares an worries. The WTS is just another corrupt, human organization run by men who crave power over others. Stick around, read through the experiences others have gone through, read the arguments against what the society teaches, and I feel confident that in time, you will also see it for what it is and it will no longer have power over you.

    It might also be a good idea to try to share with your husband what you are going through so that you have his support, as well as ours.

    Best wishes to you,

    Dana

  • LizardSnot
    LizardSnot

    Welcome!

  • singsongboi
    singsongboi

    hey!! i love dancing too!!!

  • Kismet
    Kismet

    Buffy:

    Welcome to our little piece of cyberspace. Intersting bio and I look forward to getting to hear more of your JW experiences as well as how you have grown since leaving the Org.

    This is a great place where you will find a variety of opinions, bliefs and survival techniques in dealing with leaving the JW's.

    We even have our own zealous 'pioneers' trying to convert people to another religion. (Just a word of warning in that regard.) LOL

    There are a lot of great people with varied stories. I suggest checking out the Personal experience section of this forum. Some of the stories will no doubt echo many of your own thoughts.

    As far as your kids goes, the threats of a man made organization are powerless against your children. They only have power if we give them such. As you read and research things for yourself you will find most of the teachings/threats of the Org to be hollow.

    Best wishes on your journey away from the WatchTower. If we can be of any help, just ask the board or find someone you connect with and ask them. Most here are always willing to lend a hand.

    Kismet
    [email protected]

  • Nikita
    Nikita

    Hi Buffy! Just wanted to welcome you!

    Nikita

    "I think you ought to like what you do. Because there's a reasonably
    good chance no one else is going to."
    Rich Mullins

  • cellomould
    cellomould

    Hi Buffy,

    I really feel for you. While you didn't mention whether you prayed to God, I would recommend doing that once in a while. This may help even if you find that you do not believe in God.

    It has helped me on occasion.

    It was relatively easy for me to logically dismantle my beliefs and accept that life on earth has evolved. Finding emotional balance and solace is of course a bit more difficult.

    Well, if you need help challenging your belief system or if you just need someone to listen, there are people who care.

    cellomould

    "There is no principle worth the name if it is not wholly good.Gandhi

  • waiting
    waiting

    Hey Buffy,

    Welcome to our Huuuuuuge Coffee Shop. We used to be a quiet little place - but as been mentioned.....now we're the Big Dawgs. Lol, slappin' yappin' mutes

    How do I move on from this line of thinking?
    Down at the bottom of this page are several sites with clicks. Freeminds, Research on the Tower, SilentLambs.....just a few of the many fine sites to LEARN. By learning, you can build a foundation for your beliefs - or no beliefs - built on knowledge.

    By gaining knowledge, then you can get rid of the mindless fear that the Watchtower instilled into us all. Believe me, I lived for years with the fear that if I didn't stay in the Society, my kids would be killed by Jehovah God at Armageddon.

    It's one of their nastier lies to keep people in their cult.

    Stick around - a wild and wooly place!

    waiting

  • Kenneson
    Kenneson

    According to James 3:1, our former teachers (the Watchtower Society)
    should have more reason to fear than we do. "Not many of you should become teachers, my brothers, knowing that we shall receive heavier
    judgment."

  • SoulJah
    SoulJah

    If you haven't already; be sure to make it a point to read Ray Franz book : "Crisis of Conscience"
    by the way, Welcome

    One day we'll all be together,until then I'm ready for whatever
    ---Tupac Shakur

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