How did your family react when you made it known that you did not want to be a JW anymore?

by Yondaime 53 Replies latest jw experiences

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  flipper

  YONDAIME- Good thread. Thanks for starting it. I was 44 years old about 11 years ago when I stopped attending , and really the only JW's in my family who supported my decision to stop attending were my inactive 18 year old son who had already stopped attending himself and my older then 75 year old JW mom. My JW dad supported me only because my mom did. My mom was aware of injustices committed by the elders towards me and she saw and understood why I stopped attending. My older JW siblings didn't entorely shun me- but almost- they only rarely spoke to me to appease my JW mom. Otherwise they would have shunned me altogether. My two JW daughters now aged in 2014 at 27 and 26 years of age have continuously shunned me for 11 years since they were 16 and 15 - which really hurts as I was a very involved , giving father with my daughters. My 29 year old son and I are still close.

  Fortunately - my older siblings adult children aged 39, 36, and 34 have all left the JW cult and I am closer to my nieces and mephews than even their own parents- my JW siblings. Which I believe causes resentment in my 3 older JW siblings towards me. But my view : So what ? They can choke on their hate. It's one reason theor own children aren't close to them because of their own JW fanatic ways. I am encouraged by the next generation behind me in my family exiting the JW cult- but I don't hold out any hope if at all that my older siblings or parents will ever exit the Witnesses. That's alright. It's the younger generation I am mainly concerned about. They ARE the future. And that future is looking promising compared to JW organzation ntrusions of the past into our family. Now if my two daughters would exit someday- I'd be an even happier person than I am
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  teela(2)

  I had always being questioning and picking up on things. So it was not surprise but I think the they were surprised at the level of resistance and anger against the witnesses. So as I became an adult they never tried to bring up any witness crap. I in return did not verbally attack there belief system.
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  Gone and forgotten

  Hi, I'm new here...it feels good to know I'm not alone. 

  I came "into the truth" in my mind 20's. I was a regular aux Pioneer for years, but was never really accepted by the congregation.  As a single "worldly" sister, the mothers made sure they kept their sons away from me. At the time there were 3 congregations sharing the hall, and just about everyone was related somehow. At the time I was one of a handful of people who hadn't grown up as a JW...and the only female.  But I made the best of it, knowing I was there for Jehovah, and not the people...looking forward to the new system. Then I met my ex...long story short, after 5 years of marriage, he started watching pornography behind my back.  Then he quit working.  Started drinking...heavily, gambling, and going to prostitutes...and he hadn't touched me in a very long time. 

  In what I thought was an effort to improve our lives (but he was running away from a judicial committee that I was unaware had been formed) we moved across the country. We moved several times, and I requested help from the elders in 5 different congregations...and was told by all of them, since he was my "head" they couldn't even talk to me without his permission and presence.  The last congregation had a wonderful elder that really tried to help him and get him the professional help he needed, but he didn't want help. A judicial committee was finally formed and he was Dr'd when he called this same elder in the middle of the night...of course he was drunk and was confused about where he was...

  But there was never any help for me. The elders would come and see him several times a week in their effort to help him, but they never even tried to help me.  Mostly through the years the elders would tell me it was my place to support whatever decisions my alcoholic husband was making. That I needed to be more submissive...blah, blah, blah....as a result I stayed 15 years longer than I should have. I'm out now, and intend to stay that way.

  My family is happy that I have come to my senses about both him and the Organization.  They a supportive in helping me regain my life. The only one that is a JW is his aunt, and even though I am not Dr'd, she is shunning me...no great loss...

  
  

  
  
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  MissFit

  Welcome Gone and Forgotten..

  Please start an introductory thread so everyone can "meet" you and welcome you.

  You are not alone. Isn't  comforting to know that there are many others who can relate to what you went through, 

  I'm sorry you did not get the support you needed from the elders.  I am glad you were able to move on.

  Miss.Fit