NFL bans Player for using a 'switch' on his son (page 3)

keyser soze

Many parents who did what designs described are now in nursing homes wondering why they aren't being visited by their children.

Yeah. But then again, they weren't expecting to have to be cared for in their old age. Oops.

Even my JW parents avoided using corporal punishment on us back in the day. My mother was very outspoken about the rough manner in which some brothers and sisters physically (mis)treated their children.

talesin

Steve2 said,

The core message is: Secular law has long made a crime out of one adult hitting another adult, yet in many countries says it is okay for parents to beat children. So you can hit a child and get away with it - but you cannot hit an adult. Surely those who are most vulnerable - children at the mercy of parents - need protection.

That has always been my reasoning. I've actually asked someone if the next time they disagree with me, can I give them a good smack.

Times have changed - it is a whole different world than it was ever a decade or two ago. To cite the fact that many Witness children were physically hit by their parents at kingdom halls seems a little unfair, given that even schools were allowed to use corporal punishment.

There is a key difference, though. I don't know about NZ, but here in Canada, parents were encouraged from the platform to beat their children. My schoolmates did not get beaten in church, nor did the minister/pastor urge their parents to beat them as part of his sermon.

tal

Simon

It's shameful how kids used to be dragged out of the main hall and hit. Thursday night was the worst in our KH - it was late at night and kids were being kept up way past when they should have been put to bed. Of course they are going to be grouchy or play up.

They'd be dragged out practically dangling from one arm which was bad enough and you'd hear the pleading and wail from being smacked, usually several times - did parents overcompensate because they thought others would judge them if they didn't punish them enough?

Of course a whole hall full of people would sit and listen and do nothing while this played out fairly predictably every week.

Did people think they were educating or teaching those kids anything other than what an awful place the KH was?!

little_Socrates

Of course sometimes children need to be disiplined, there are even circumstances when spanking is understandable....

However if you read anything about the Peterson case it was CLEARLY abuse. The details of the case are quite gruesome. Please if you feel any sympothy towards Peterson read the details of the case.

flipper

I've always felt that parents who are abusive to their children need to have their parent cards taken away. Either that or be " fixed " so they can't have children. Lots of idiot parents running around on this planet

steve2

If a parent insists they need to physically hit their child for disciplinary purposes, all they highlight is how they have shaped their parenting in such a way as the child now expects it. To need to hit a child is simply the response of a parent or guardian who is (willfully) ignorant of more effective parenting behaviours and who harbors a view that might is right.

little_Socrates

There are times when any reasonable person would think spanking is okay. Particularly if the consequences of what the child is doing could be signficanly worse than the spanking. Like for an example if your child runs into the street without looking for traffic, or if your child is about to touch a hot stove. Being spanked is clearly better than getting hit by a car or being burned.

However many parents spank because they are angry at their child. They spank to make themselfs feel better. You should NEVER spank out of anger. If you do that is abuse.

Also IMO physiological abuse is far worse than physical. Children get hurt all time through play or what ever, but they recover very quickly. However when they are physically abused, it is the physiological componet that makes it so bad. Also we need to have just as much outrage when children are verbally abused. Those scars last a life time.

Simon

There are times when any reasonable person would think spanking is okay. Particularly if the consequences of what the child is doing could be signficanly worse than the spanking. Like for an example if your child runs into the street without looking for traffic, or if your child is about to touch a hot stove. Being spanked is clearly better than getting hit by a car or being burned.

I disagree - I think children respond far more if you explain the consequences of what could have happened. I'm not saying it's *not* OK to react, of course it is, heck it warrants a shout or a scream ... but smacking? Imagine the opportunity to tell them how much you care about them and how much you'd miss them if anything happened to them and that if you did shout / scream that it was because they scared you so much - I think that is far more convincing and beneficial in the long run.

Kids can be stubborn and determined - if you try and go head to head with them over lots of things you will lose. But make something emotional or give them the ability to "be good" and they will change drastically. You just have to watch episodes of "the nanny" to see kids and parents screaming and spanking and out of control and then she comes along with some reasoning, things like "a naughty step" and boom - better behaved kids.

I don't think you can ever come up with a scenario where smacking is the best option.

Giordano

being smacked, usually several times - did parents overcompensate because they thought others would judge them if they didn't punish them enough?

Good point! Throwing a DF child out of their home at age 18 especially, if the father is an elder has to be over compensation when the logical and loving thing would be to help guide them to learn a trade or get help for a drug problem etc.

What about the blood issue? Standing there watching your child die because everyone in the congregation says it's the right thing to do.

The JW to survive in their community has to be a follower.

NFL bans Player for using a 'switch' on his son

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