by EdenOne 26 Replies latest jw friends
It's curious that, once the 'doctrinal glue' dries off, many of us realize that we don't have much in common with the other JW's and the friendship tends to fade off. This can only be realized when both are "out". Naturally there are exceptions, but this comes to show that indoctrination is such a powerful equalizer and nihilifier of one's individuality.
Eden
I have a few I'd like to track down...
I know a really vocal exJW apostate from my old congregation, I've thought about giving her a call but her anti JW tweets are a little much so I've put it off so far...
The last congregation I was associated with is far away from where I live now. However, thanks to Facebook, I am in touch with one former "sister" in particular who I'm very fond of. A young man, who was only a child when I left, has also friended me on Facebook. Locally, I have LV101 and flyingfreefaerie. I have had a couple of phone conversations with a former elder I met on this board who lives not too far away.
I find comfort in having these people to talk to from time to time. I think it's similar to men (and women perhaps) who have been in combat together in a war. There's a cameraderie that outsiders can't relate to.
I have also been to several apostafests, but never met anyone at any of them that I had known as JW's. Still hoping.
My personal experiences with trying to reconnect have not been good. On one hand there are those that, while no longer attending, some even being DF'd, they still feel that it really is the truth, they just can't live up. And, on the other hand, there are those that really go on to extremes, one that I know of becoming a white supremacist. Some of those people never really liked me all that much anyway, and I get the feeling that they feel that if I believe that JW's are not true, then maybe JW's really are true!!!
Something that I found interesting is how many who leave the org suddenly take up smoking, even if they never smoked a day in their life before becoming a JW!!
after high school about 75% of the congregation youth left. i reconnected with most of them through fb, and we are now very close. they were floored that i left, but super happy. it is so nice to have friends who understand the process of leaving the cult.
Although there are a couple friends that I would love to see freed from the Borg, I have no interest in meeting general ex-JWs I've known (if there are any), for the reasons mentioned above. I don't know why they left; were they kicked out, did they go crazy, will they turn me on for apostasy, etc. I'd rather meet normal people who haven't been damaged by the religion like me.
Nope. I really do not care, it is past. There maybe two or three individuals who I would not mind to be in contanct, but for the rest, it does not matter. I have met several ex-JWs I knew, and some of them are still emotionally messed up. I do not hang with my ex coworkers, schoolmates, and ex-lovers. It is all in the past.
I have often wanted to do so.
I would have liked to have attended the Tahoe-fest.
But with recent events like the Beth Shan "outting", how could someone who desires to "fade" take the risk?
Doc
EDEN ONE- Yes I HAVE re-connected with one good friend who left the Witnesses in 1990 I found out about 5 years ago. In the 1980's my then JW wife and he and his JW wife- the four of us used to regular pioneeer together with assembly parts - the whole 9 yards. He remarried a non-Witness in the early 1990's after his JW wife cheated on him, and after my JW marriage ended in 1998 I remarried in 2006 a non-Witness also. We have had some great conversations on the phone several times and I'd like to see him again soon. Go visit, but it's about a 6 or 7 hour drive. Just have to take the time.
Also - I have talked on the phone with a man in his 30's who I knew as a young boy who exited the JW's about 5 years ago. My elder dad studied with HIS dad in the 1970's and HIS dad became an elder too. This young man was DFed for apostasy and his wife left him. He's doing fine now and we have occasionally kept in touch and it was in my hometown I was born in. In fact I owe him a phone call- which I'll do today ! Thanks for reminding me ! Great thread by the way
DESIROUS of CHANGE- If you attend the Apostafest I always make sure to keep people's identties private if they so desire. I ask people if they want their picture on the private section apostathread - and if they don't - the picture does NOT get posted and I black out or red out with protective labels any way of identifying the identity of someone who doesn't want to be identified. We'd love to see you at Tahoe some year ! You should come ! You'd have a blast ! Peace out, Mr. Flipper
