Did you ever write your disassociation letter? (page 3)

confusedandalone

Also Op from previous posts it seems you have no close family in ... which is great.

How old are you if you don't mind me asking

make yourself

Exactly, I don't want to make a point to them. If I make a point it's to state I want nothing to do with the religion anymore. I'm in my twenties.

oppostate

Why play by their rules?

Well, you can beat them at their own game.

Write a letter that threatens to sue if there's any negative mention of you at a public meeting.

Say that you are withdrawing membership from such-and-such congregation but in no way does that entail disassociation.

Say you will consider any attempt to contact you after receipt of the letter as a form of harassment.

Tell them you'll sue the BOE but not the WT, unless the WT provides legal counsel to the BOE and thereby including themselves in any judicial action you may take.

Live your life happily without encroachment from the elder-hounders.

My fade was going fine until they started pestering me. They were saying 'we love you' and 'we want you back' so I knew they wouldn't give up and every CO visit I'd be getting discussed about or I'd be looking over my shoulder worried I'd get caught doing something I shouldn't be by them, living like that in my opinion was living by their rules. So I wrote a very simple letter saying I don't want to be known as one of them, and dont contact me.

The relief cannot be described, and it's a plus I no longer have to engage in conversation with them anymore.

confusedandalone

Make yourself I was a born in. I decided I was done at 35 or so. I spent my twenties turning down great opportunities for work etc... yes 35 years of my life wasted. You are in your twenties with nothing holding you to the org. No family and you can make more friends. I lost all my family and friends on leaving... but I had respect for myself and my decisions.

I am almost at the point that I no longer feel I have any real connection to the org. I have no need to wonder if they will ring my bell. Like happy at last no one will harass me or family. I don't have to keep up with the latest news and mags. I don't have a need to rent out space in a newspaper and tell everyone else why I am mad. Also remember that some of the people who tell you that writing a letter is playing by their rules are the same people who a few years ago said they wanted to write one as well.

They still have not written letter. Are they scared... or confused? Who knows. I was once scared and confused. However in a personal decision I put on my big boy pants, wrote a letter and now I am completely free of them without harrassment.

confusedandalone

Great post happy@last. You are 1000 percent correct... There is no greater peace.

make yourself

I'm at the point now in my life where I want to make my actions count. I've been doubting at least a year after I got baptized. I made this account then, I firmly believe this is a destructive cult, emotionally and mentally. I just don't want to doubt and then get back in the flow of meetings and field service and it turn itself back into a droning routine. I want to make my moves now.

confusedandalone

Make your moves and don't look back. Set and reach your goals so when you are 40 you have a clear path and can focus on the important things in life.

We ther you write a letter or fade is your choice. I think you are smart enough to determine the benefits of each option. If you want to left completely alone by the cancerous organization then you know your path. If you need to linger for some reason then you have another option.

Ultimately moving on and leaving this completely in your past should be the goal. Much luck and success to you.

done4good

Blondie-No

I don't play their game

No pearls before swine

Sorry, but this "playing their game" platitute is something that needs to stop. It is repeated far too often here, and many times by respected posters on this board. It could not be any farther from the truth. I DA'd 7 years ago and it had nothing to do with playing anyone's game. I had completed a successful fade by the time I did it. It had nothing to do with "closure" either. Rather, it was a pragmatic decision to ensure my freedom. No looking over my shoulder if I want to put up a Chirstmas tree or be seen at the voting polls for me!

If you think about it, if you have to hide who you really are around JWs, (and this is NOT judging those who are fading, I know there are many good and important reasons to do so), what could be "playing their game" any more than that?

d4g

Finally-Free

I DA'd in 2003. Ejecting the cult from my life was no different than ejecting someone from my home. It was not 'playing by their rules'. It was asserting and enforcing my own.

W

Did you ever write your disassociation letter?

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