Your opening thoughts are excellent. It is much that way in most cases of one mate waking up. I felt that I was sneaking around on my wife while I was researching TTATT.
But I don't agree with your 4 choices.
You said:
Once someone learns TTATT, your spouse has only 4 choices.
1. Be married to an actor going through JW motions half Ass knowing it is BS
2. Stay married to an unbeliever and face the embarrasment of being a spiritual widow.
3. Leave the unbeliever and hope they move on with their lives so they can be free to remarry.
4. (Best case) Spouse wakes up later on once they see that their loved one has not changed, or improved without the cult influence.
But that is not true at all. My spouse has no way to choose me going through the motions because I won't do it. Some don't give their wife the choice of staying married to them in such a situation, especially when kids are involved. I have read here of some who say they offer to help their spouse leave the lies or else they will leave their spouse. Many of us are hoping for number 4, but it doesn't always happen.