JW Kids - More Frightened Than Most?

by Englishman 62 Replies latest jw friends

terafera

For years I tried holding my breath and being as quiet as possible while pinching myself
(to make sure I would be quiet/could endure torture in the "Great Tribulation")... or else
I revisited this scenario again and again wondering if *I* would be dropped off a bridge.
This paragraph brought tears to my eyes because I had almost forgotten that that was the exact same thing I would do! Hundreds of times, from the age of 4 upward, I would try to hold my breath and pray to Jehovah for help, so I wouldnt die in the Tribulation. I was so worried about being a 'survivor'.. I liked Rambo movies and James Bond movies because it seemed they could get out of any situation, and I thought that one day I would be like them, hunted down and running.
I have been wanting to ask anyone their ideas about the possible link of OCD and being raised a jw? When I was little, I displayed several obsessive/compulsive behaviors but it went unnoticed. I would have to click a light on a certain way, say certain phrases in my head... anyway, I read a book once that said when you are in unhealthy or stressful circumstances, it can be irritated and worsen. Of course, I had a very dysfunctional home, so that could have attributed to it too. But I do wonder...
You know, even when the planes fly over my house real loud, I get a shiver. That fear of 'is Armagheddon starting?' is still there... I did suffer from panic attacks for over a year but with some good info and meditation techniques I am free from them, thank God.
Hilda,
People here act like they are SOOOOOOooooo concerned about the kids. Yet what do most worlding teach their children? Premarital sex
is okay. To talk profane is alright. To watch lewd entertainment is right on. Puffing on cigs is not that bad. What a sick world.
And last, most parents do not discipline their children like they should. The world is a bad place and children should know it.
That was the most ignorant post I've ever read in my life. What do most 'worldling teach their children?' Hmm... well since I guess you would consider me a 'worldling', how about asking me??? For your info, I discuss morality with my son, and this is what I've taught him:
1. Sex is for when you're married (hopefully). If you think all good jw kids arent having sex then I'd like to know the name of the planet you live on. Here on Earth, in all 7 of the congregations I went to, the jw kids were getting it on more than the 'worldly' kids. Heck, my worldly friends were virgins and one of my jw friends gave oral sex to a man in his car during a Kingdom Hall building. You're in denial....
2.Talk profane is okay? Hmmmm.. we dont allow 'stupid', 'jerk', or anything else rude or offensive. But my jw mother and brother would tell me to F*** off and what a whore I was every other day. Weird, huh?
3. Lewd entertainment is okay? Not! Our kid watches PBS and Nickelodeon, when the tv is allowed to be on. I guess thats much worse than the R and XXX movies I've seen Ministerial Servants go to....
4. Puffing on cigarettes is okay? We teach our son that they are deadly, cancerous and horrible. I'm sure my jw brothers and sisters that would sneak to the park with me and smoke cigarettes feel much differently... maybe you should ask them.
5.The world is not all bad... I teach my son to watch out for predators...you know, the types that prey on innocent, good-hearted people? I teach him to think for himself, to get out of any situation that feels wrong... to be proud of who he is.. that God loves him regardless of his imperfections.
In final, let me tell you this, I was raised in a jw home where there were beatings, screaming, breaking things, drinking, cussing, crying, emotional games, verbal abuse, neglect, and hatred. It was only after I left that I have a good life and live morally.
Matty

E'man, this thread has brought up too many familiar and unpleasant memories in me.
My primary foreboding thought while I was a child was that petrifying anticipation of God's anger if I ever fell short. God never seemed very loving and caring to me – he was always judgmental and condemnatory.
I spent so much of my childhood in tears it's just embarrassing to admit. It was drummed into me that I was “different” and “special”, but I just wanted to blend in with the rest of the kids. I was the kid that didn’t celebrate any holidays, that didn’t go to Assembly in the morning, that couldn’t go to any after school clubs.
It’s strange that as a child, how you can accept this as just a fait accompli.
The painful experiences I went through as a child are with me to this day. But how can I be angry with my mum and dad for bringing me up in a way that they sincerely thought was the right way?
ashitaka

Hilda,
hahahahahaha
I married a strong woman, and I want her to stay that way, that's why I she and I both don't let the JWs hurt us anymore.....as if what you say is worth something....listen to yourself....completly sure that we're bird-food, and that you're doing some great service other than alienating yourself from your own humanity. Don't make this a woman's rights issue....every woman on this board knows you're full of shit. You're in lonely country here.
go jump off of a bridge, because your truth has no ring of truth...sounds like J.R. Brown reciting a prepared PR statement.
again I beseech you, go bowl your head.
sorry e-man.
ashi
Englishman

Oh the world is just fine. September 11, Israel and Palestine, drug dealing, immoral sex, profane and blasphemous speech, lewd entertainment aimed at kids, crime, Bill Clinton. Oh yeah. The world is just fine, English.
Ah Hilda, you have totally blown it now. You know what you are? You are a typical Daily Mail reader!
Yes, Daily Mail readers and Watchtower readers both have the same problem. You believe that societies problems somehow make you in the right! You believe that every act of violence, every wrongdoing, is some sort of grand proof that what you believe is the truth!
Mistakenly, you think that that the world is degenerating. It's not. All that's occuring is more newpaper reporting and ever larger amounts of media-hype a la Watchtower that focuses on individual incidents in an attempt to prove it's point.
Don't waste your time on Moral Panics, http://www.aber.ac.uk/media/Students/mtw9403.html, life is too short. Love your family and your friends, warts and all, even their (to you) apostasy,
Englishman.
HildaBingen

:1. Sex is for when you're married (hopefully). If you think all good jw kids arent having sex then I'd like to know the name of the planet you live on. Here on Earth, in all 7 of the congregations I went to, the jw kids were getting it on more than the 'worldly' kids. Heck, my worldly friends were virgins and one of my jw friends gave oral sex to a man in his car during a Kingdom Hall building. You're in denial....:
Of course some jw children have sex. But we do not TEACH our children that premarital sex is okay. That is not a fundamental jw tenet. Even Christians in the bible committed sex sins. You would not know that though.
:2.Talk profane is okay? Hmmmm.. we dont allow 'stupid', 'jerk', or anything else rude or offensive. But my jw mother and brother would tell me to F*** off and what a whore I was every other day. Weird, huh?:
Again, jws do not TEACH their children that such language is ok. There may be exceptions, yes. But I am talking about what jws teach and how jws GENERALLY act.
:3. Lewd entertainment is okay? Not! Our kid watches PBS and Nickelodeon, when the tv is allowed to be on. I guess thats much worse than the R and XXX movies I've seen Ministerial Servants go to....:
Where do Jw publications teach kids that R or XXX movies are fine? Why some elders in my circuit even think that you gotta be careful seeing pg-13 movies.
:4. Puffing on cigarettes is okay? We teach our son that they are deadly, cancerous and horrible. I'm sure my jw brothers and sisters that would sneak to the park with me and smoke cigarettes feel much differently... maybe you should ask them.:
Did your parents TEACH them that it was okay to smoke? I sure know that the WT did not teach them this stuff.
:5.The world is not all bad... I teach my son to watch out for predators...you know, the types that prey on innocent, good-hearted people? I teach him to think for himself, to get out of any situation that feels wrong... to be proud of who he is.. that God loves him regardless of his imperfections.:
The world is not all bad. It is only about 90-95% bad. Teach your son that. Do you teach him that the whole world lieth in the grip of the wicked one like 1 John 5:19 says?
:In final, let me tell you this, I was raised in a jw home where there were beatings, screaming, breaking things, drinking, cussing, crying, emotional games, verbal abuse, neglect, and hatred. It was only after I left that I have a good life and live morally.:
I am sorry you had these experiences. But I do not think you yet know the meaning of the word moral.
ashitaka

Hilda lieth in the grip of Jack Daniel's loving arms.....
Matty

I know of an extrordinary amount of "brothers and sisters" who read the Daily Mail. I think you have hit the nail on the head there E'man. No wonder they all think that the Guardian is an Apostate newspaper!
Been there

Hilda the difference with the "worldly" kids being afraid is that they can see what they should be afraid of. JW kids are terrified of things they can't see. It is deep with in, you can't hide from it. The mean God who is going to kill everyone. Having to make sure you are perfect enough not only for your own concience but everone elses in the cong.
It is a very very heavy burden for a kid. Thousands of hours sitting for 2 hrs. being perfect. Sit straight. Stop figgeting. I remember countless times being drug up the isle by my arm begging noooo. I was off to the bathroom to get a spanking, for figgeting. Little kids can't sit that long listening to things they don't understand. I couldn't even read then.
I was petrified of Armeggedon. Storms scared me. The dark scared me.
Loud noises scared me. I had panic attacks at 8 yrs. old. I go in and out of them to this day and I've been out of the Borg. for 28 yrs. I have had years of counciling and medicine to cope. I am defective. The things I needed to learn as a kid to cope were not taugh. Quite the opposite. I have no self esteem to this day. I am unworthy. I am unlovable. I am not perfect. I am intolerate. I am judgemental. I only have conditional love. I don't know how to feel loved. I am angry for who I might have been. I'm tired of the battles in my head.
Kids know cig. & drugs hurt you. Sex gets you pregnant. They have a healthy fear. You can't fight, defend or protect your self from the unseen.
Just for the record all the "BAD" things I did when I was growing up I learned from my good little JW friends that I had to play with because I could'nt associate with worldly kids. They aren't better, just sneakier. I had no birthdays, no christmas's, nothing to say I was special in any way. I hated every minute of the time I was a JW kid. I vowed to never put a kid of mine through that.
My grandmother raised me. When she died a few years back I was free to try and find the God I knew in my heart Loved me and ANYONE who loved him no matter what faith they had. I am happy to say that after many years of God not giving up on me, when I had given up on HIM, me and God have a good thing going. I talk to HIM all the time now. I have been going to a church that suits me. They hand out food, & drinks and anything else someone in need, might need. I am finding my GOD to be loving an generous he wants us to be happy and loving and helpful.
All I can say is most of the JW's I have ever known are unhappy. GOD is crying for them, me too. But I am still bitter about it all and may always be. "Just Get Over It" not likely!!!!!!!!!!!!
I am grateful for this board, for many years I have just wanted to talk about this to someone who understood. Now I have hundreds of people who understand my fear. Thank you all for listening.
Sorry I vented so long, I got on a roll.
HildaBingen

Mr Englishman:
:Ah Hilda, you have totally blown it now. You know what you are? You are a typical Daily Mail reader!:
What is the Daily Mail?
:Yes, Daily Mail readers and Watchtower readers both have the same problem. You believe that societies problems somehow make you in the right! You believe that every act of violence, every wrongdoing, is some sort of grand proof that what you believe is the truth!:
Believe me I wish the world was not as bad as it is. But this world stinks. Don't just ask me. Ask philosophers who have been atheists or agnostics because of world conditions.
:Mistakenly, you think that that the world is degenerating. It's not. All that's occuring is more newpaper reporting and ever larger amounts of media-hype a la Watchtower that focuses on individual incidents in an attempt to prove it's point.:
And you know this for a fact? Get your hand out of the sand, sir. If 9/11 did not wake you up, if all these suicide bombings don't wake you up, if rises and potential rises in cancer do not wake you up, what will?
:Don't waste your time on Moral Panics, http://www.aber.ac.uk/media/Students/mtw9403.html, life is too short. Love your family and your friends, warts and all, even their (to you) apostasy,:
I love my family and friends. But you know where I draw the line. Those hating Jehovah--I cannot love.
l'kiddush hashem.
HildaBingen

:Hilda lieth in the grip of Jack Daniel's loving arms.....:
Jack Daniel's? Yuck! Give me some MD 20/20!

JW Kids - More Frightened Than Most?

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