My Daughter Begins to Reason on Her Own About the Witnesses

losingit

Success!

Today my oldest daughter attended her first birthday party ever for one of her best friends at school. We actually crashed because we didn't get an official invite or even an email, but it ended up working out and the mom was happy to have us there. Yay!

The ride home after the party was the most interesting part. She timidly asked me, "Mami, why do you say that the Witnesses don't have everything right?"

I responded, "Well, it's because they hide a lot of things from people and don't tell the whole truth, and some of the things they teach is wrong."

"I was thinking... I don't understand why holidays or birthdays are bad. I mean, people are just celebrating how many years someone is alive. And nothing is wrong with that! I went to my Lizzie's party today and all we did was have fun. Nothing bad happened! It was nice."

Then she reasoned further...

"And Christmas. I mean, most people don't even celebrate the religious part of it. It's just fun! Decorating a tree, the food, hanging out with your family. It's all just fun and nice!"

(Notice she didn't mention the presents even considering she celebrated her first Christmas this year with a TON of presents )

And she reasoned further...

"And Valentine's Day! It's just saying 'I love you!'"

However, what impressed me the most was this comment because it reveals EXACTLY what happens once one stops attending the meetings...

"You know, before I didn't get a chance to think about anything and I felt guilty about eating a doughnut for somebody's birthday. I had to think to myself, 'I'm only eating a doughnut, there's nothing wrong with that.' And now I have the chance to reason and I see that a lot of the things that they say just don't make any sense. I'm getting to see now what it's like to be a normal kid.

Mami, do you think they were lying to us? That everything they taught us were lies?"

I started tearing up. I told her that once she is older we can get into some of the reasons why I decided to not go back to the meetings and do some research together.

My daughter is open to the opportunity to be a normal kid (whereas before she resisted so much), and she is finally enjoying it all. She has let go of the Watchtower world. I am so happy.

LisaRose

Wow, she is one smart kid. It's so great she got out of the religion before they messed up her head.

It's really just that simple isn't it? It's just cake, wishes, friendship, celebrations, fun. All good things, no good reason to give them up.

OnTheWayOut

This is the greatest type of update. Your daughter has it right that people are just having fun or saying "I love you" when they celebrate. You can mention how even the Bible mentions Job's childrens' "special day." You can mention how the Bible never condemned birthday celebrations, it just mentioned something bad that happened at a couple of them, but it mentioned bad things that happened at other times, too.

Thanks for sharing such a positive thought from your daughter.

Gypsy Sam

Great update! Nice to hear she is thinking on her own!

zophar

OnTheWayOut: You are sure right on with Job's children. In fact some of the paraphrased translations are VERY specific as to what these Special Days are:

Job 1:4 His sons, who were all wealthy landowners, too, all used to gather together on each others’ birthdays and special occasions. The brothers would take turns hosting the others in their homes, and they would invite their three sisters to eat and drink with them. The Voice Translation

Job 1:4 Every year when Job’s sons had birthdays, they invited their brothers and sisters to their homes for a celebration. On these occasions they would eat and drink with great merriment. The Living Bible

Crazyguy

How old is your daughter?

Aunt Fancy

That is very good news and so uplifting to hear of a young one who is using her critical thinking abilities. You are definitely doing something right in helping your daughter to get out. Keep us posted on her progress.

whathappened

Wonderful news! You have your daughter in a good place where she feels she can talk to you without being punished or judged.

smiddy

That is very good news , a JW child using her thinking abilities . Thinking and using your powers of reason frees one from the cult every time.

I wish you both well on her journey back into the real world .

smiddy

losingit

Thanks everybody! It's been a long road since last February when I was df'd, since April when I learned TTATT and July when I attended my last meeting.

My oldest is 9, turning 10. She struggled during that time to figure out what was going on and who she really was. Would she remain a Witness despite the fact that both her father and Istopped going? With each celebration there was alwsys that guilt in the background, with a declaration that she's a Witness and she has to make Jehovah happy. She was raised in the cult for her early years. I didn't really know the mess I was getting involved in as I wasn't raised as a jw.

But I do know that I insisted on afterschool activities amd summer camps despite the fact tht they were frowned upon. I just didnt see anytjing wrong with it. She wpuld have that ,at the very least.

And sincewe've been out I've upped the ante. She was on a basketball team

My Daughter Begins to Reason on Her Own About the Witnesses

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