Back in the year 2012 I was in the throes of my "crisis of conscience", but still "waiting on Jehovah"...for ...something....anything, that would restore my withering faith in the Governing Body. Then an elder pointed out to me the insert in the KM about the JW website, which I had yet to visit. I guess he thought it would encourage me. Well.....that's when everything really started unravelling!!! There was a video of highlights from the 2012 AGM. The "new light" about the FDS was briefly discussed. I cried when I saw it. I thought "This is what I've been waiting for!! The GB are humbling themselves by admitting they do not yet have authority over "all the Master's belongings!!" It seemed they were relinqusihing power. I thought that because they had admitted having not been rewarded yet with Kingdom power, then they could no longer judge as rejected, all the members of Christendom, (previously understood to be at the same time, in 1918/9). I wrote to the GB to express my appreciation and how I was glad that we did not "blanket condemn" all those in Christendom anymore (well...obviously, in my eyes!). I held my breath while waiting for a response. It came. They "rejoiced" with me over the new understanding, but then went on to slam Christendom, though they stated that they "make no attempt to judge or condemn the members of the churches of Christendom". Then some months later the July 15th 2013 WT appeared. It clearly stated that from 1914, Jesus "rejected all false Christians in the congregation and those in the churches of Christendom" (page 12, par 8). According to the article, these were the weeds that started to be collected, from 1914, and were 'bundled up", destined for the "furnace". Clearly this means that individuals are being judged. Logically, if such ones died before Armageddon, they could not expect to be resurrected (just as with the pre-1995 understanding regarding the 'goats") . I wrote back to the GB for clarification. They (the writing dept I suppose) said that though "we" do not judge people, "Jehovah and Jesus do", and clearly, "some people will not be resurrected". Then they went on to say that "many who are considered unrighteous will be resurrected because there is a chance that they will decide to serve Jehovah if they are taught the truth in an environment free from the negative influences we experience in Satan's system.." How can this include those in the churches if they have figuratively been "bundled for the fire"? It just makes no sense. Are they "rejected' or aren't they? Of course, that entire July 2013 WT was a desperate attempt by them to find some kind of scriptural back-up for their claim of STILL being "chosen" by Jesus in 1919. It was very pathetic: Insisting that the wheat and weeds parable finds fulfillment since 1914, rather than when Jesus returns in the future (when they have moved the fulfillments of Jesus' other parables to the future), and using the "pattern" of Jesus literally feeding the many through the hands of the few, when his disciples distributed the "food" miraculously provided.. (ie. FDS now a few, seven men) So lame!!!
Getting back to 2012. When I attended the 2012 DC I expected the "new light" about the FDS to be at least mentioned. I was shocked and disappointed that such a MAJOR doctrinal change wasn't addressed in the programme! (I had to wait a few months for the July 2013 WT.) At this point I wasn't ready to give up hope for the GB entirely, but I knew that DC would be a turning point, one way or the other, depending on what I heard. I didn't even make it through the first day before my decision was made. I walked out taking my daughter with me. When the July 15th WT eventually arrived, it was confirmed that I had made the right decision! I was disfellowshipped for apostasy in June 2013 after making a stand for my conscience. It was the bravest thing I have ever done!!
