Should I Tell a Witness that I Am an Apostate?

by Band on the Run 19 Replies latest jw experiences

  • Band on the Run
    Band on the Run

    She does not appear to be well-educated. It was already apparent to the group. They know I once was one and hated the group. She mumbles so I had to translate key phrases that others could not distinguish. They were "Jehovah," "holy spirit," and something else I can't remember. I heard these words clearly, unlike the rest of her mumbling. She appears to be a nice person. I have no trouble taking on Bethelites or local Witnesses. There is a smugness in them that invites sarcasm and knowledge.

    Maybe she calls herself a Witness but is not active. If I go on in my usual customary way, I will feel bad. I don't believe she chose the Witnesses Something tells me she does not even know the doctrines. Lord knows things will pop out of my mouth. I just pray for some restraint and prudence. A nonsmug Witness-my aunt was one--they are rare. She is no intellectual. Maybe some kindness from me will have her rethink the Witness stance on apostates.

    Truth be known, their smugness sets my smugness in motion. Her presence is going to leave me with a long gratitude list for escaping the Witnesses. My problem is that I view the Witnesses as the group with which I went to war. The key battleground was education and the freedom of thought. Feminism was another battle. My brother, sister, and mother did not fight the way I did. I was going to go before a judge to finish high school. The parents of my schoolmates were so proud of them. There was respect even for the student demonstrations against Viet Nam. I was a dummy. Well, I had Pete Seeger for a troubador and they had Kingdom Melodies. As a female, I had no place in the KH. Women's bodies were disgusting. The ground was very black and white in my early twenties.

    I don't know why I post so much here. Living well is the best revenge. The Witnesses defined truth for me for too much of my life. It was child abuse to grow up in Newark, NJ and child abuse being raised as a Witness.

  • Violia
    Violia

    I have noticed that if you are an X anything and post on an X board, most assume you have an Axe to grind. However, it could be a sure fire way to get rid of her by telling her you are an apostate. She may run like the wind.

    I once got into this on another board and up popped several others who either had an positive experience with jws or a relative . It can go either way depending on so many factors. Easier to say nothing but not always possible.

  • fulltimestudent
    fulltimestudent

    Our background in this KKK (Krazy, Kristian, Kult) makes us inclined to be obsessed with 'preaching**.'

    But is there a need to do or say anything?

    I love the Daoist (and Chinese Buddhist concept of wu-wei, acting by not acting its often called,

    ( http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Wu_wei ) but maybe a better description is 'natural action'.

    An action that just flows from the situation.

    If you'd never had your thinking distorted by KKK thinking, what would you do in this situation?

    This woman joined your discussion group (not exactly something that the Jws would encourage ) seemingly indicating a desire to know something.

    Why not let her grow naturally in the direction of her own choosing

    ------------------------

    ** I suggest that the JWs are not the only ones with this problem, observing the world I think its a problem for all christian based societies.

  • skeeter1
    skeeter1

    if she is an innocent, weak-kneed and uneducated JW, then leave her alone and allow her dignity within the group. She is not evenly matched in argument to you. You risk looking like a bully with your group, when you have an opportunity to look mature. That being said, you can get to know her better and plant seeds of doubt. I have no doubt that you have the savvy to carry it off!

  • Giordano
    Giordano

    Fulltimestudent said it well.

    I have a beloved cousin who sounds like this person. We talk every couple of months and she can be funny and caring. She's a gentle soul and I adore her so I make sure the conversation is pleasant. If she stray's into WT talk I gentley remind her that I left those things behind me and then ask her a question about her assisted living facility...... she got into a fist fight last year with an abusive person who bullies other elderly persons. Or the heavy Metal night club she visits once a month where the band calls her grandma and she dances with her walker.........I am not kidding you........you just never know about us old folks.

    If she told me she had real doubts and concerns about her beliefs I would try as best I could to offer her some insights and certainly compassion.

  • Band on the Run
    Band on the Run

    Well, here is hoping that I behave.

  • Phizzy
    Phizzy

    For those of us who left the religion before all the Doctrinal changes of 2012/3 it is technically impossible for us to be Apostates. We never held the latest beliefs, so cannot "step aside from, or abandon" them.

    Not that JW's would hesitate to label us Apostate at any hint we do not believe their nonsense, whether we ever had or not.

    I would, if in the same circumstance as you, use the opportunity to ask questions, and then plant seeds, it can be real fun.

    Pretty soon the JW usually gets a feeling you "know too much" as one said to me in such a discussion, the general public, despite 130 years of JW preaching, knows little about them.

    Have fun and let us know how it goes

  • pronomono
    pronomono

    Phizzy, like AlphaMan said it's impossible to be a JW apostate.

    The reason? We received advancing light and moved forward with Jehovah's progressive organization. It was the GB that was not adaptive enough to keep up with advancing light. They have clung to old light and past truths. (Proverbs 4:18)

  • Pronger1
    Pronger1

    I'd leave it alone. Any attempt to sow doubt in her is doing exactly what the WTS accuses "apostates" of doing. Better to be respectful of her beliefs and proven the WT wrong about those who no longer believe.

  • kurtbethel
    kurtbethel

    She's not entitled to know things about your past that you're not willing to share.

    If you like her and are willing to invest the time, salt your conversations with her with questions that she can't answer from the playbook, that she has to investigate for herself to get an answer. You want to be sincere and get some real anwers from her.

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