by wafflesandpancakes 52 Replies latest social relationships
This really is completely insane. How anyone can live with this kind of self imposed neurosis in their lives just blows my mind.
This religion utterly tries to dominate each second of your present life.. they hold every minute of your eternal future to ransom.. and still not satisfied they hold your past hostage too.
Is this the 'freedom in Christ' they speak of in action? Or simply mental and emotional slavery to the obssesive perversions of old men?
WandP,
Happily your wife came to you first. secondly now that she has take OTWO's advice, I agree with him. What you did during your engangement is private and your wife needs to know this.
Besides, most elders will just get a laugh out of a married womans guilty conscience on this matter. Ask any former elder the strangest and funniest confessions they have had there was a thread.
Welcome to the forum, stick around for a bit. Love Kate xx
Your wife, if she 'confesses' to the elders, will be putting you both under a whole heap of UNNECESSARY scrutiny. You're married now. It was a long time ago. What went on before is irrelevant to your lives with each other NOW and will achieve nothing but embarrassment (as others have said), putting a strain on your marriage. One of my relatives and his wife confessed to their elders about their pre-marital fooling around and they found the experience very traumatic and had to cope with the shame of being reproved - don't do it! They're divorced now but that's a whole other story.
It's none of anybody's business but your own. As others have said, if your wife feels guilty, she should confess to God, say sorry and ask Him for His forgiveness. Matter closed. Move on.
On 1 Jan 2014, wafflesandpancakes wrote:
trying to convince my wife not to confess...
"trying to convince my wife not to confess... during our engagement, we fooled around and touch each other down there. It's not a "tap" but definitely is not "stimulation". I tried to convince my wife, who, after 5 years of marriage, strangely felt guilty all the sudden, that its not do called porneia. Well i am fading and shes still in, so thats probably why i'm not guilt ridden."
But, on 15 Aug 2013, wafflesandpancakes wrote:
Premarital sex--how prevalent?
"in my old congregation, everyone seems clean. mostly chaste courtship, kingdom hall wedding, blah blah.
well there are lots of cases of fondling but they were soon forgotton. when my husband and i confessed to sex before marriage, the elders were disgusted. a year later tho, another couple fessed up."
Which is it, wafflesandpancakes?
Hello valkyrie. This is my sister's account. she told me about the site and when i signed up i apparently have to wait for a while until they approved my account, so i am using hers. Sorry for the confusion.
Ah! So the difficulty with restraint and self-discipline runs in the family, does it?
haha
1. The WT's policy of confession, judicial procedures and disfellowshipping has no basis in scripture.
2. Even if it did have basis in scripture, use the same double-standard. hypocritical rule the WT uses to get its Elders ( aka, "glorious ones") off the hook when they're guilty of committing disfellowshipping sins in the past but didn't confess:
"Shepherd The Flock" book, p.38:
19. If it comes to light or an appointed brother confesses that he has committed a disfellowshipping offense years in the past, the body of elders may determine he can continue to serve if the following is true: The immorality or other wrongdoing occurred more than a few ago, and he is genuinely repentant, recognizing that he should have come forward immediately when he sinned. (Perhaps he has even confessed to his sin} seeking help with his guilty conscience.) He has been serving faithfully for many years, has evidence of God's blessing, and has the respect of the congregation.
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You see, the WT has two standards: one for its men in power, and the other for the rank-and-file. The Elder has a "get out of jail free" card; you, as a mere "publisher" will suffer the full wrath of WT policies should you confess.
What's done is done. Move on. Don't be a slave to WT nonsense.
You might enjoy watching "Life With Father" 1947. It's about current with Watchtower teaching on headship. See what happens when the wife, through hyperactive conscience, confesses to her padre.
ADCMS, wow. What hypocrisy. Thanks for sharing.
gorgia
