The packages will arrive today... What do you think will happen?

by Faithful Witness 18 Replies latest watchtower beliefs

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  Faithful Witness

  I'm relieved and surprised there are not more scoldings coming at me right now. Before the JW's, my sister was the biggest gift giver in our family. I don't know if anyone else here is a convert who once had a big family Christmas tradition, but the giving is the fun part. She used to show up with piles of gifts, even though it was clear her husband resented it. He made grumbly comments about Christmas and excess, but she was very generous, and we all made homemade gifts and treats for each other. It wasn't about the presents, but we sure had fun finding and giving and laughing and eating together.

  I am not trying to amass evidence against her. I have forgiven them for the way they treat me. But it is not the kids' fault. They are old enough to remember the parties, and they know they are being excluded. We had a modified version of a gift-giving holiday, that we called the "homemade trade." That went on for a few years, until "I turned my back on Jehovah," and my sister started shunning me. My house is centrally located between family that lives hours apart, so now there is no party, after they refused to come and my dad tried to change the location to his house and exclude 1/4 of the family. That story is contained in one of my earliest posts here. Our family just got indelibly ripped in half last year. The rawness of it has subsided enough for me to finally have compassion for the real victims here... The children (And my brother in law).

  I was thinking that maybe since I didn't actually TOUCH the food or the gifts, they will probably accept it in secret. I didn't find the "one-click curse from satan" button on amazon. I think that Costs extra. My sister might someday have a lightbulb moment, and remember the fun we used to have. I will sit here and wonder about it, but they've broken my heart enough times now. I get the hint.

  I am not the one that is confusing them.

  Thank you all for your mixed JW perspectives. Explaining Christmas to JW's is like explaining JW's to the world. Haha ;-)

  I would LOVE to give the gifts in person,or even have the chance to talk to my JW niece. I would take them to an amusement park or anywhere they wanted to go. Unfortunately, that can't happen. I am already being shunned and slandered, so I'm not sure I could make it worse by sending a small gift.

  Perhaps they will have enough awareness or a flicker of a reality check when they see the kids are happy to get some attention. It's a calendar and a set of blocks. I'm out $100 on the whole deal, with parents and sister. A small price to make them think about how assanine they are being.
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  Faithful Witness

  And yes, I love to cook. Stirring the pot is important!

  This will give them something to think about.
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  blondie

  When I was a kid our non-jw relatives and friends, sent or gave us presents. The WTS position was that we could accept xmas/birthday gifts but not give them. So jws should be able to accept. It all depends on your jw status, Faithful Witness. If you are labeled apostate, are df'd or have da'd, it would be like accepting gifts from the demons, that the gifts are demonized and should be trashed. (Just reporting, not supporting)
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  Narcissistic Supply

  JW's are narcissists and narcissistic suppliers. That's it.

  The only thing you can control with a narcissist is the narcissistic supply that you give them.

  Simple.
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  ldrnomo

  I think you will be OK sending these gifts. And they should be OK accepting them.

  Just tell them that they're just Christmas Fractions
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  ruderedhead

  Sounds lke they have accepted them before, so they will probably accept them again, but, again, without acknowledgment. You are doing the right thing for the kids, you obviously have a lot of love and compassion. Try not to be hurt, just think of the kids. You respected their beliefs having them wrapped in non-holiday paper. The kids will be thrilled and will be able to secretly share what gifts they recieved at school. You are showing true Christian qualities here. You are Awesome! Merry Christmas!
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  steve2

  A rule of thumb with the receiving of Christmas or birthday gifts this:

  If no other witness knows you received them, discreetly make use of them as you personally see fit.

  Chocolates, nibbles and alcohol are more easily disposed of (slurp, hiccup). Religious artifacts less easily.

  I once received rosary beads from a lovely Catholic man (I had expected cash, but hey, it is ungracious to specify what gift you want - unless you are American). I rushed the beads off to the local charity store but when I got back home, there the beads were on my bedroom table! THey had come back with a vengeance intending to demonically possess me.

  Panicking and breaking out in a cold sweat, I nonetheless realized I deserved all that I had coming...until I remembered he gave me two sets of rosary beads: One to recite before sinning, the other after. I had dispensed of the "after sinning" beads.

  I heaved a sigh of relief, marked my Watchtower for the next meeting and said a brief prayer to Mary Jehovah - but did keep a wary eye on those beads until I next embraced that lovely Catholic men when I awkwardly slipped them into his back pocket. He didn't say a word. My prayer had been answered.
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  Billy the Ex-Bethelite

  Most every JW is terrible about thank you cards, I think. We're so unacquainted with giving and receiving... and manners. From things I've seen, you can give a needy pioneer your personal check for $1000 and they'll turn their back on you, telling everyone how "Jeehovah provides!" That was so tiresome to hear. Jerkhovah has been unemployed for thousands of years and been mooching off the hard earned money of his human slaves.

  By historical JW standards, the policy would be that if you weren't accepting the gift, you were to return it with a note giving a "witness". However, after I saw the video with Sparlock, a new toy and gift from a friend at school, going straight into the garbage, it's clear that a new standard is being set. No, "Now let's make a nice Thank You card for your friend." And no, "Jehovah hates toys, so we should give him back to your friend and 'witness' to him about how we as JWs are better than everyone else because we never have fun." Instead, "Jehovah hates make-believe toys! Destroy the wizard!" and it was straight into the trash. Can you imagine the reaction of the gift-giver's parents when they find out this new toy that was gifted was throw in the garbage by religious wack-jobs?

  FaithfulWitness, I don't know what your family is doing with the gifts, but if they're wasting them, they're among the worst 'witnesses' I've heard of.
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  Faithful Witness

  blondie: that is a question I have been asking them for many months. What is my status? I was never a JW, but a bible student for a long time. We seriously considered and examined it carefully. When asked directly, they tell me there is no problem with me. Their behavior is the exact opposite, treating me as if I do not exist, unless they can see me seeing them seeing me.

  I do not do well at mind games. I do not know what is expected or acceptable.

  I will say this: A year ago, my dad sent out an email to all his adult children. (5 out of 6 are not JW's,never have been). In this message, he stated that his main focus in life now is to be a "good Jehovah's Witness." I found this statement alarming. It was followed with, "I hope you have noticed some improvements." I did reply to him privately, and challenged him to ask himself whether he was serving jehovah, or serving an organization.

  I have not seen any improvements in my father, unless numbness and lack of passion for life would be considered an improvement. He has grown in thoughtlessness, and has bled this bizarre behavior all over my mother, who used to be my best friend. They have become rude, arrogant and robotic.

  He had asked me not to share his messages with anyone else, to avoid hurt feelings. (In it, he told me how he would always be closer to my JW sister, even if I did become a JW.) I told him that I would do that, but that I hoped he would share mine. "I wouldn't be surprised if they discourage you from communicating with me anymore, after 42 years of a fine family relationship." I have not heard from him since. He will speak to me, if we happen to be t the same place at the same time.

  It is only my sister, who has come right out and told me that she won't bring her kids into my house. She has to protect them from idolatry.

  Ok, moving on to my own life, and my own family, that actually cares if I exist. I hope the kids enjoy their gifts, and that maybe one of those cookies in that gift box, will crunch in a way that wakes up a brain cell in my sister's skull. Probably not.

  Confusion makes sense to JW's.