The packages will arrive today... What do you think will happen?

Faithful Witness

I have decided that ignoring my niece and nephew during the holidays, is the most unloving thing I could possibly do. They stopped celebrating Christmas and birthdays, after my sister began studying with JW's about 6-7 years ago. We did nOT celebrate either, until 3 years ago, when my son was 2 and my daughter was 4, and we'd figured out that the JW's are wrong about this decision.

I have sent a few letters and cards to my sister this year, in an attempt to reach out To her. I had no reply, but she did acknowledge receiving them, when I asked her. I asked if she opened them and read them, and she said yes. About a month ago, I cashed in some gas station reward points for a restaurant gift card and sent it to her, inside a funny card about a priest getting pulled over. (Joke included at bottom of this message). Inside the card, I wrote a note about taking them out for dinner, and that someday maybe we can do it in person.

I am assuming she got the card. My kids sent a small puzzle book and handwritten notes to my mother around the same time. We heard no reply from that mailing either. I thought it odd and rude, but am just hoping they did get them. I wasn't trying to get a thank you or recognition, but I have come to realize that my family no longer believes in common courtesy. I never learn... so I am repeating myself This week.

Scheduled to arrive tomorrow, I have sent two small gifts from amazon to my niece and nephew. I emailed my sister and told her they were coming, and that the one for my nephew did not offer gift wrap. For my 12 year old niece, I sent a wall calendar: "What cats teach us." It includes cute kitten photos, along with "inspirational" messages that I could not preview. I assume it will be along the lines of, "take lots of naps" or something like that. Maybe one of the phrases will inspire an independent thought one day. For my 10'year old nephew, I sent a little building set with pulleys and levers. I heard he was learning some engineering stuff, so it looked just right for him.

I also sent a treat package in non-holiday colored packaging. One to my sisters house, and one to my folks. Too generous, i know.

Any guesses what they will do? Will they just take and eat, say nothing about it? Throw it in the garbage? Will they give the gifts to the kids? Lie to them or hide them or throw them away? I may never know. Just wondering what you all think...

I am fed up with the way they treat these kids. I seriously wish I could help them. Will this act of kindness make me even worse in their eyes? I'm not trying to buy them, but dont know how else to show them we do care about you, innocent children who did not choose to be forced into the JW trap!

Joke on card I sent:

A police officer is standing next to a car, being driven by a priest. "Father, have you been drinking?"

Priest: "Just water, officer."

Officer: "Why do I smell wine?"

Priest: "Good Lord! He's done it again! It's a miracle!"

(I crossed out the happy birthday) My sister and brother in law used to party sometimes. Alcohol and marijuana, until they were counseled to quit the pot, before they would be allowed to go in field service.

Julia Orwell

Yeah they'll tell the kids satan's trying to buy them with gifts or something, but I'm surprised your sister hasn't asked you to not send gifts. If you want to avoid offending them and show that you respect their beliefs, (even though they have no respect for anyone else's) just send them stuff a few weeks earlier. But JW parents coat their kids in cotton wool to protect them from 'the world' so who knows to what extremes they'll go. Shame you can't visit the kids and take them to an amusement park for a day. That would mean so much to them.

LisaRose

I think they will keep them, but never send you a thank you. It would easy for them to justify keeping presents that have no holiday connotations, other than the timing. But their cult mind control will prevent them from actually contacting you.

What else can you expect? They are in a cult.

Oh Gawd

The fact that you don't know how they'll react is ine of weirdest parts of this religion. It seems every JW as their own code of rules.

My in-laws never celebrated xmas or birthdays, but they would just happen to give gifts around that time. Same with their grand kids(mine). It's never a xmas present but they'll get some sort of gifts...probably the week after xmas.

Funny story...My son (11) once poclaimed if he didn't get his way, on whatever it was he was insisting upon that day, he was going to go live with grandma and grandpa. I go, if you go live with them you won't get xmas. He says, with a smile, sooo? I don't care, they'll still buy me presents...we'll just call it Bryce's present day..LOL!

steve2

Oh why would you send cards at all, let alone ones that make fun of priests and have birthday greetings crossed out? If its possible for me to have difficulty deciphering your intent, it will be more difficult for your family to decipher your intent. It's as if you are trying to amass evidence about how mean your JW family are to you and your children. I can understand you trying to reach out to them - but your methods seem strange and hardly shaped by a need to be effective.

Pubsinger

Send birthday and Christmas cards and put in a cheque. Then you'll know when they break their rules and accept the gift.

Listener

This is another weird thing with the jw's. Their not thanking you for the gifts may well indicate that they have been accepted and used/eaten. Their conscience does not allow them to thank you because then they would be seen as publicly accepting these gifts whereas if they keep quiet no-one knows what they've done with the presents. It's the type of twisted thinking that JWs find themselves involved with.

A really committed JW would be more likely to return the gifts with a thank you note and reminding you that they cannot accept the gift but they still appreciate your thoughtfullness.

The Searcher

It's easier to just accept that you have different viewpoints on the subject. If she accepts yours, thank her and let her alone to live by her choices.

You can always show your family affection by sending a gift outwith the mandatory gift-giving season.

nugget

Sadly for JWs everything is about them, they may keep the gifts and let the children have them when they arrive rather than at Christmas but it will not occur to them to send a thank you. This is something I was pulled up on very soon after my exit and I now am fastidious about thanking people.

For JWs so much thought is given to working out what is allowed and what isn't, what is a compromise, how it affects their standing in the congregation, how other people will interpret their actions that there is no time left to consider the feelings of the giver.

If you wish to give gifts and can afford to do so then continue. Your contact will let the children know that there is someone outside for them and that is priceless.

KateWild

We always accepted gifts from non JW family, and thanked them for their kindness. My kids have never really missed out on birthdays, Christmas is a different story. My dad can be facetious and Xmas is not a big deal, but he used to make a big deal when we were JWs. He knew it was a cult, so highlighted the inflexibility.

Now we are out, he couldn't care less what we do on 25th Dec. LOL!!!! He has made his point. He was right, go figure

Kate xx

The packages will arrive today... What do you think will happen?

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