What was your "Aha!" moment?

by Hortenzie 52 Replies latest watchtower beliefs

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  Dark Lord of the Evil Slave Class

  It was when both my children came to us, at different times, and were in tears because they were frustrated that they had no real friends, neither "wordly" (because I was trying to be a "good" JW) or at the Hall (because they just weren't reaching out to *us* despite us reaching out to *them*. Because we weren't very active in field service and not "regular" at meetings). They felt very alone.

  It broke my heart. I determined that I wouldn't let them go on like that.

  A few years later, they have friends, everything has normalized, and the wife and I have faded with no regrets. When you get a little distance and perspective, it really is amazing how much BS you realize you put up with. And how hypocritical the entire Society is.
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  DATA-DOG

  When I learned that 1914 as the enthronement of Christ was not even official WT dogma until the 30's. I think it was in the Harp of God. It was a crazy time. I would go to JWfacts and then "borrow" old WT literature to see if i was being lied to by JWfacts. Once it was clear that the information was factual, I got hold of COC and ISOCF. Then when I visited "apostate" websites I very little reason to ever doubt a WT quote. I even grew to love the Snarky Apologist!!

  DD
• 

  chickpea

  aha! hit like a ton of bricks when my youngest child revealed his concerns about his gender expression ...

  i came to the realization that i could cling to the convoluted paroxysms of mangled interpretations of a nomadic desert culture's mythology as "gospel" .... or i could support my son through one of the most courageous human endeavors imaginable... totally dropped the penny for me...

  i left believing but was lucky enough to end up here and have the scales drop from my brain!
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  joyfulfader

  I have just recently realized that as a born in, I never have believed. I have never believed anything for myself and only did things to please others. I cannot recall ever developing a relationship with "God". I have leaned toward agnosticism for much longer than I ever imagined. I believe so much of it was the hypocrisy that ran rampant in the congregation with which I was in association with. I had no idea that my own personal cognitive dissonance not only involved religion but it involved a god that I always perceived as being partial, mean and violent. I could never understand the Jesus/God thing since Jesus loved and cared for all no matter where they came from or what mistakes they made. He forgave.

  My aha moment was at a HUGE anniversary party for a former CO and his wife. I had just gone through hell with JC meetings regarding my abusive husband and had kicked him out for so many valid reasons. I was sitting in a room of hundreds of people in formal gowns and tuxes. There was a huge cake and a table of presents. I sat at a table as the elder began to pray before the meal and he thanked Jehovah for the gift of marriage. I remember my head popping up uncontrollably and sat incredulous at the rest of the prayer honoring this couple. Granted, I have always loved the both of them for many, many years but all of a sudden I saw the insane hypocrisy of anniversaries vs. birthdays. I work closely with pediatric hospice and every birthday that is celebrated is a gift and another milestone the doctors say most of them will never meet...I could not bring myself to reconcile the idea that another year of marriage is ok to celebrate with such bravado and pomp and circumstance and the celebration of a life soon to be cut short is a sin...unfathomable.
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  sarahsmile

  Rip Van Winkle strang you said,

  "I realized that (for years) I had hoped my mom would die before Armaggedon-- so that she could live in the new system.

  Insane. Insane."

  I remember sitting in the living room with my mother,widowed,visiting with three elders. They said, "It was better that your father and husband had died on this side of Armageddon because he would never survive Armageddon."

  My 6'3 brother heard what they said and ran in there, and told these pathetic elders," they better get the hell out of here and never come back. You got two second and they better run because they were going to get the shit beat out of them!" How dare you for making such a horrible comment to someone who just lost her husband a couple days ago."

  I should have paid more attention to my aha moment because life only got worse in the Borg.

  Insane is right! Those elders are about 80 now still living, still elders!
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  free2beme

  A few minutes after the O face..... O O O O ... Aha!
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  LisaRose

  I had a series of Aha moments over about a year.

  The UN explanation I read about sometime in the nineties made me go hmmmm. A few other things, the constant guilt trips that you were never doing enough.

  I was thinking about my life and how isolated and loneyl was. I was inactive, but attended meetings, had a few acquaintances at the hall, but no real friends. My children had grown, my husband was disfellowshipped. It dawned on me that I would have been much happier if I had not been a Jehovah's Witness.

  I hit a crisis point in my marriage. I thought about the fact that I had stayed in an unhappy marriage, due to the teachings of the Watchtower. They said it would ALWAYS be best for all concerned. I realized that actually not so much. All I did by staying was to give my children a bad example of what marriage should be, I enabled a whiney baby to do whatever he felt like despite the cost to his family (the man had 75 jobs in 28 years, would quit or get fired) and I made myself miserable. What possible good could come of that?

  That was the straw that broke the camels back. It just hit me that everything I had been taught was a lie. If there was a loving God, he couldn't possibly get anything out of my misery. If he was not loving, he certainly did not deserve my devotion.

  That was it, I was free.
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  Hortenzie

  WOW!

  I was away from the civilization for a few days, now I came back and read all these different AHA! moments and encountered some info that made me go AHA! all over again. Thanks, and please, keep it coming!
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  Hecklerboy

  My Aha moment was at a JW wedding.

  The elder was giving the wedding talk and mentioned how the wedding ring was a pagan symbol but we don't look at it that way now. That really got me thinking.

  Now I absoulutely love Christmas. I wanted so bad to celebrate as a kid. My mom even realized this and let me watch the Christmas cartoons like Rudolph and Frosty. Of course we were never allowed to actually celebrate it because it was pagan and we would die a horrible death if we did.

  I thought "Wait a minute!! How can one thing be pagan but is OK to do because "We don't see it that way" and Christmas be wrong because it's pagan"?

  From then on my eyes were open and one day at a Circuit Assembly I just got up and walked away. I remember it was a beautiful sunny day. I drove to my moms house and had a wonderful visit with her.

  Life has been good ever since.
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  jeremiah18:5-10

  My aha moment occurred several years after being dfd. I was actually sincerely attempting to return and get reinstated. I decided that to do so I wanted pure motives I wanted to do so out of love for Jehovah. So I determined along with my wife to start reading the new testament. I did so without reading any wt info. I also did so with an open mind. I started with acts, by the time I was in Romans, ny eyes were opened to how hypocritical the wts is. I was shocked at how wrong they were in the hope for the future, I only read of a heavenly hope, no alluding to earth at all. I was struck by the freedom that was preached about and how rules and regulations and human opinions were discouraged. I realized that the whole process was warped, hypocritical, unloving, and unscriptural. I determined I could not subject myself to their pharisaical court and practices.

  After this things moved rapidly. I read CoC, searched the web and discovered UN situation, then jw facts, jw survey, jw struggle, then JWN. Ive not looked back since. I feel so much happier and fulfilled and have zero regrets.