A mistake in fading 4 months ago is coming back to haunt me... HELP!!

by ILoveTTATT 45 Replies latest jw friends

  • Black Sheep
    Black Sheep

    Your mother needs to get the message that this mess is her doing and she needs to fix it.

    She raised you in a doomsday church that already had a string of prophetic failures before you were even born, (name one that occured in her lifetime, that she would have had to ignore, excuse, whatever). Jehovah had steadfastly refused to do anything the WT promised on his behalf before you were born and she still gambled on them, a high stakes gambol that if Jehovah let them down as usual could easily result in her kids leaving the church, resulting in instructions from her church leaders to shun them if they got DF/DA.

    It was her choice to raise you in the church, her choice to advise you to get baptised even though Jehovah had already clearly demonstrated he didn't support the WT's promises, and now it is her choice whether, or not, to attempt to call the dogs off and try to influence them to leave well enough alone ..... and if they do announce you as DF/DA it will be her choice whether, or not, she lets her church leaders tell her to destroy her relationship with you.

  • Narcissistic Supply
    Narcissistic Supply

    I don't understand this drama. I was never a JW. Why would you be afraid ofthese people. You are not giving them their narcissistic supply and they will throw you out of the mickey mouse club. Geeze. What a waste of time and silly drama. Have fun.

    My advice would be to grow a pair and stop the drama.

  • ABibleStudent

    Hi ILoveTTATT, How about tell them the truth? Leave messages/texts for them that you are unavailable to meet with them when they want, do not come to your home (i.e., your parent's house) uninvited, and that you may be willing to meet with them in a couple of months.

    If you do talk with them individually (not together and not recorded), tell them that you are very busy with your new job, you are under a lot of emotional pressure, and that now is not a good time to meet with them. Tell them that things should be better in a couple of months and that you will call them when you feel well enough to meet with them. If they continue to try putting pressure on you to meet with them now, just go ballastic like you are becoming emotionally unstable, and tell them that you cannot take being harassed by them and to leave you alone or you will go to the police. In other words, make them think that their actions are the last straw in your emotional break-down. It might help to do a little research about symtoms of emotional breakdowns. Even seeing a psychologist might be helpful.

    Remember they are from another congregation, you have done nothing wrong, and delay meeting with elders as long as possible. By the way, did you figure out what congregation has your card yet?

    Best of wishes for you and your family.

    Peace be with you and everyone, who you love,


  • TweetieBird

    A friend of mine avoided the elders when she started dating a "worldly" man and she was not "scripturally free". She didn't care about getting df'd or anything, just didn't want to get dragged through the kangaroo court and was hoping they would just df her in her absence. She even sent one of the elders an email saying that she had done the deed with her new boyfriend and as far as I know, nothing was ever done. That was about 3 years ago.

    So, if you don't meet with them, they probably won't do anything. Just make excuses for not meeting them and maybe they will back off.

  • Zoos

    I like what Anony Mous and Smiddy said. The only the authority those men have over you is the authority YOU GRANT THEM. As long as they sense you fear them they will exploit it and you.

    edit: Perhaps "fear" is not the correct word.

  • westiebilly11

    ..dont' meet with them.........why give them the gun to shoot you?.......walk away..stay away..but whatever you do ..do it for yourself....be honest with yourself...

  • GoneAwol

    ILTTATT. Is this your life? Do you own it? Are you responsible for you? Are you responsible for every action and decision?

    Or are they? The 'elders'? My advice? Tel'em to f off! 'scuse me.

  • cofty

    What GoneAwol said!

    Stay in control and do nothing that you don't want to.

    You will look back on the events of the next few weeks many times in the years ahead. Be sure it makes you proud of yourself and the way you kept your pride and dignity.

    [email protected] them!

  • Lied2NoMore

    Tell them your attorney isn't available on such short notice.

  • Gorbatchov

    Don't meet. Stay in control.

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