Whats your opinion on the best way to step down??

Leander

I know a lot of you here were former pioneers, servants and elders. How did you go about stepping down? Did you just not say anything, did you write a letter or call one of the elders?

I've decided not to go into any detail with the elders about why I'm stepping down, that way hopefully they won't have a reason to DF me. But then again they know I was talking about having doubts about 6 months ago.

I'm thinking maybe I should just write a short letter saying that I'm stepping down for personal reasons and just leave it at that. I'm also thinking that I'm going to skip the slow fade routine and just stop attending meetings once I step down.

Xander

If it matters, try transferring to another nearby hall. Then, you can fade out pretty quickly there (attend maybe one meeting a week for a bit, then stop going).

The brothers at the new hall will think you were always borderline inactive, and not push it (they don't WANT to lose members, and if you aren't harming anyone else/spreading apostasy to their knowledge...)

The brothers in you old hall will just assume you are doing fine over there.

Seems to work pretty well.

Xander F
(Unseen Apostate Directorate of North America - Ohio order)
A fanatic is one who, upon losing sight of his goals, redoubles his efforts.
--George Santayana

Leander

I've thought about doing that before Xander but the hall that I presently attend is where most of my wife's family attends also. So if I just up and transfer I'm postive that they'll be very suspicious. I'll probably be better off just stepping down at my present congregation and then disappearing.

My problem is I'm not sure how to go about announcing that I want to step down without causing to many waves.

LyinEyes

Are you talking about stepping down from pioneering, MS or elder?
My hubby was an elder and he stepped down, they were trying to get him to give himself some time before making that desision. Finally he called them on the phone, ( he works out of state alot) and told them he had to step down. The main reason he gave was he couldnt be a good elder and take care of his family with so many responsibiies. Plus being on the road alot , took him away from the congo.
You better beleive they made sure they got the book back. THe elders book. By this time , they knew something was not right as we were gone working and didnt make meetings while home. It didnt take them long to make sure they had the keys to the hall back, the file cabinets( secret stuff lol) and letters to the body of elders. It pissed me off the way they did it. One elder came over very early in the morning to get all those things. Made me wonder who he talked to on the phone the night before. My father in law was a MS and stopped going when we did for same reason. He worked out of state alot too.
He just stepped down over the phone, citing work as a majoy reason.

Leander

I'll be stepping down from a MS. I don't plan on even giving them a reason why, I'll try to just leave it as personal reasons. And if they push the issue I'll just refuse to go into it. Of course they'll probably already have a good idea why tho, I probably should have never mentioned I had doubts last year.

biblexaminer

How about this. Have your duties restricted and curtailed slowly. Use health reasons. Say "I ahve been to my doctor and his prognosis is that I need less stress in my life, MUSH less. You can be an elder or ms in name only. I know, this worked for me.

Then do less and less. They will talk to you about not being an example in meeting attendance. Field service is no problem, cause you can just fill in some numbers and presto! But duties you need to restrict.

They don't push any responsibility on me now. Try dropping a hint to the CO that your health isn't what it used to be. Say "they haven't isolated it yet, but it's really bothersome and painful", and they will start to back off.

Health. That's the way to go.

Leander

Thats pretty clever BE, slow and painless. My biggest problem is that 3 of the elders at my congregation are my brother-in-laws. And since my wife's family is very close they pretty much know everything that goes on. Something was telling me to choose another congregation when I first got married. Oh well

Guest 77

Stay with YOUR plans. Be yourself.

Guest 77

RunningMan

I stepped down as a Ministerial Servant about three years ago. My advice is to keep it positive.

I told the elders that, due to changes in my personal life (new job), I could no longer devote the amount of time to my MS responsibilities that the job deserved, while still looking after my family's spiritual needs.

This excuse presses all the right buttons:
1. You are stepping down because of your huge respect for the position and its requirements;
2. You gain their sympathy because you are admitting that you recognize your inadequacy in the face of these awesome god-given responsibilities;
3. You play the family card, which carries a certain sacredness with it; and
4. You give the elders an implied compliment that you recognize how hard working and great they are, because they are able to live up to these expectations.

Good luck and welcome to the free world.

AvailableLight

There was a thread about this not too long ago. Here was my idea:

-----
Here's an idea for resignation:
What could they do if during a TMS assignment or service meeting part you took 30 seconds and made the following announcement yourself:

"I'd like to take a brief moment to inform the congregation that I have decided to discontinue serving as an/a [elder|ministerial servant] due to matters of principle and personal issues. I look forward to continuing to serve God alongside you as friends."

Make no mention to any of the body that you were planning to make this announcement, so everyone is equally surprised. Then simply cease to attend elder's meetings. When pressed by the other elders for reasons, refuse to give them and kindly mention that the reasons were private and that the elders were no more entitled to them than the members of the congregation. How good would that be?
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You can check out the rest of the thread here:
http://www.jehovahs-witness.com/forum/thread.asp?id=26303&site=3&page=1

Whats your opinion on the best way to step down??

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