I'm in the same place with my mum.. my hubby knows how I feel and she does a very little but I have to hide a lot of what I feel with her. I have to pretend a lot. She worries about my 'spirituality' as she calls it. It's hard not to be able to tell her how I really feel about things but I know she wouldn't be able to handle it. I keep off JW things as much as possible. I know what she loves to talk about so I just stick to those things, if it starts veering off into JW speech, I let her have her say then try and change the subject. It works quite well a lot of the time. It's still hard though!!
I hate it that I have to lie so much to fade...
by ILoveTTATT 22 Replies latest jw friends
-
-
jgnat
How about changing subjects quickly, asking how she is doing? People more than anything want to be appreciated and heard.
-
ILoveTTATT
@Phizzy: Yes, I have thought that here the right thing to do would be to use some deception.
@blondie: I love your posts!! The WT comments
You have made me think... maybe the next stage (when financially OK) would be to start saying how I am not feeling well with the cong... etc... saying that I feel depressed, etc... but that I don't want to talk to the elders... I should post in a couple of months just to bounce ideas as to how to "come out of the closet" that I am fading...@auntfancy: Very good points. I CANNOT tell my mother, it is not the time... if ever... I have learnt a lot from this site, for example, I am not telling TTATT to anyone I know in real life... only my dad, and not a word to my mother. I have to re-read Hassan... There might be some ideas of his that I would be willing to try. As to my parent's happiness... I don't know what will become of them if they go out of the WT. My dad has had some health problems, so I feel bad that I broke the "I will live forever" bubble for him... I really want to break that bubble for my mom, though, because it is that lie that might keep me from her in the future... I sincerely love them both, and I guess that financially, not donating so much money, not going to overpriced international conventions, etc... will make their lives better
@endofmysteries: Amen!! It really is a war....
@tornapart: I guess I should say, keep doing what you are doing!! It's what I should continue to do too!! Just let her talk, then quickly change the subject.
@jgnat: I love your posts too!! Thanks for helping the community out so much!! You deserve an award for all your work!!
I definitely will do that... ask her how she's doing, and let her speak.Thanks all!
ILTTATT