Ok I have been fading fast, missed a lot of meetings over the past couple of months and the kids think its mostly do to my being busy with work. This morning was probably the first Sunday that i was home and could go but did not. So my 8 year old asked me if i was going and why when i said no. I'm wondering now that its going to become more obvious that I'm just not going to my kids and they ask about it, what do I say??? Most of you know that my wifes still in heavy so I need advice on what to say to my children with out everything blowing up on me?
Fading fast children are starting to ask questions, need help.
by Crazyguy 28 Replies latest jw friends
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Iown Mylife
"As hard as I work, sometimes I just don't want to leave the house on my day off - I know I need to try harder to be balanced."
Or something along that line. Imagine having to justify wanting to rest on your day off.
The Cult SUCKS
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LisaRose
I wouldn't go into it too deep. Just say that you are taking a break from meeting attendance while you do some independent bible study of your own for a while. If he asks more questions, reassure him that you are fine, and you still love him and his mom. Kids are mostly just concerned with themselves and want to be reassured that their world won't change. But be honest if this may not be the case, kids can sense deception, they are little lie detectors, really.
When my daughter was six, she told me that I should divorce her father, and marry a rich man so I could quit work and stay home with her. I sometimes wish I had followed her advice. Those little ones are smarter than you think sometimes.
Lisa Rose
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ABibleStudent
Hi Crazyguy, If there is no way that you will be able to tolerate attending another WTBTS meeting, then your options are limited. I like Lisa Rose's advice to say that you are doing independent bible study on your own for a while. It might work for a couple of months. Another option is to always plan on being busy at work on meeting nights or doing something else that you enjoy and saying that you are working (having fun). As long as you do not prevent your wife from attending meetings, she may not bother you for a little longer, as long as you do not go "Apostate" on her.
Unfortunately, you will either have to start attending meetings or JWs will start to worry about you (i.e., think that you have doubts).
Best of wishes helping your wife and children to critically think for themselves.
Peace be with you and everyone, who you love,
Robert
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Narcissistic Supply
Be as honest as you can. Be impeccable with your word.
Have some balls. Be Strong.
Best,
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frankiespeakin
You could tell them that the meeting are awfully boring and repetitious and seem to be making less and less sense. Don't go into anything doctrinal.
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Captain Obvious
In any case, be honest with your kids. They don't deserve to be lied to. They also don't deserve to have their lives stolen by a cult.
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Jeffro
Crazyguy:
So my 8 year old asked me if i was going and why when i said no. I'm wondering now that its going to become more obvious that I'm just not going to my kids and they ask about it, what do I say??? Most of you know that my wifes still in heavy so I need advice on what to say to my children with out everything blowing up on me?
You feel the need to defend your actions to an 8-year-old because you don't want to go to some religious services?!
Child: Why aren't you going to the meeting?
Father: I don't want to.
Child: [Any follow-up question]
Father: When you're an adult, you can make your own decisions too.
When the child is mature enough (ages vary), maybe show the child that JW beliefs are rubbish. Start here.
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Hortensia
I agree with being truthful with your kids, but limiting the amount of information you give them. You can start with simple things like you work all the time and you need some time at home. Then, maybe, independent bible study. Then later, you can say you don't know if you believe in it any more. But always assuring the kids nothing is wrong, and you love them and their mom.
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Aunt Fancy
Being honest is the best way to handle it but you also don't have to give them a lot of info. Hopefully you will be able to keep them from getting baptized and help your wife out.