Hello All,
I am so nervous and waited for long to speak to someone on my faiths and beliefs! I am from a non-Christian Background, a Hindu. I got to know 'The Truth' (Or Myth) from my Hubby while we were working. Six months into study, was so 'filled' with Holy Spirit, i asked the elder that i am ready to be taken as un-baptized publisher. To my surprise he dis-agreed! He wanted me more regular to field service. I strayed from my Mom and brother even when we used to live together for 2.5 years as i was so strong in my beliefs! This caused a lot of fights and tensions at home and my mom (being from a religious Indian family) wasn’t getting any alliance to get me married (as they ALWAYS believed in arranged marriages).
Finally my mom gave up her wishes over mine, got me married with JW in a way that was approved by Elders. She had no say, absolutely anything!! <which i felt very disappointed about then, as she brought us up single handedly when i lost my Dad at a young age>.
During Engagement party, there was another family member, who by chance had got a beetle leaf and arecanut (which is considered pagan custom, and none of us were aware then) on the gift basket that I was given. Elders were notified when my study conductor saw my photo along with these and just 1 day before the wedding they had a meeting, already discussed among themselves to Dis-fellowship all of us. We were all disheartened, crying and begging, pleading mercy as it was pure ignorance on our part and someone else had done it. But it all fell into deaf ears. After 6 hours of pleading, the committee decided to save us but we need to ask sorry to all witnesses who have seen the photo.
This experience was the first one to make me and my hubby start having doubts about the so called ‘faithful and discreet slave’ class. I tried hard to be one among these people, taking up pioneering, answering regularly, and regular to the meeting but somewhere I feel I am being hypocrite. I guess the main reason is I don’t want to lose my good friends and in-laws who are active in the truth (at least I think so). More I ‘act’ more I am having doubts about this organization. Although Jesus said, that he has come to cause division in families, he never dishonored Jehovah, his family, his father, then why did I had to go through the bitter phase towards my loving mom and brother? Have shunned all the 'Wordly' practices. Told my baby Birthdays are not done by good people (she doesnt have a clue whys that.. she is just 2.5 years :(( )
Why is this love shown by them (org) is conditional? They don’t portray this while doing door to door. Just going through this bad phase of confusion.
BTW even after directly asking people all these questions, we don’t know the answer (with in the organization!!!)…