Post 7: Hopefully the last letter I recieve

by sosoconfused 34 Replies latest jw experiences

  • sosoconfused
    sosoconfused

    I think my mother has lost it. I really do and I am in fear that she is literally losing touch with reality to some degree.

    Even my father is telling me that her responses to me are growing weirded:

    The scriptures tell us that we can be wrathful.......but don't sin. My anger toward you was justified. So I put off responding to you. However, the longer I waited, the farther I wanted to be from you. Of course the devil wants Jehovah's servants to be divided, for family members who serve Jehovah to be divided. And if we allow him a place we will act earthly, animalistic and demonic. (James 3:15) Each time I wrote to you, I prayed for Jehovah to direct me & give me the words that would touch your heart. If you carefully consider them, you'll see that I am truly concerned for your spiritual welfare. <my wife's name removed> wild screaming and accusations on the phone....why? Where is she getting these things from? Voices? I fear for her! My feelings are varied <my name removed> . The beginning of the letter you left in the door reminded me of her and brought to mind the scripture I earlier mentioned...James3:15. Yes, you have a right to your feelings and beliefs and as a mother who loves you, I have the right to fight for my son's spiritual life. When I mentioned removing you from my medical directive it was not to imply that you wouldn't respect my decision to refuse blood. It was because you appear to want to leave Jehovah's organization. If that is the case, then I'll need someone who is loyally standing by the channel that Jehovah is using, the faithful slave. Regarding what I said in the letter that applied to <my wife's name removed> , you read it, it was sent to you both. Jehovah instructs us........... "let the aged women be reverent in behavior, not slanderous, ........teachers of what is good; 4 that they may recall the young women to their senses". As an older woman, as her mother in the faith and as her mother in law, I did that. I don't regret it because it was what I should have done. If she feels she is above accepting counsel, so be it. I hope that you can see she needs it ......
    <my name removed> . we have a fight against wicked spirit forces. You know that. In times past, many of Jehovah's servants have been physically attacked. Some have been spiritually attacked. That is worse. You have no desire to attend your meetings, or pray, see no need to daily read and meditate on Jehovah's word, lose confidence in the anointed of Jehovah. That's a sneaky, subtle attack. We may not even realize it. Someone may give us something or we could get an item that previously belonged to someone who in some way has ties to spiritistic practices. Could it be something left in your new home that you were not aware of? Or maybe an interest in things the media says against Jehovah's organization.

    We considered in a recent magazine, the point of being loyal to Jehovah is also reflected in how we view our brothers and sisters. Do we always just see the negatives or do we value their positive qualities? Since coming to <her new congregation> , Jehovah has blessed me with many new sons and daughters in the faith. I truly have grown to love them and draw close to them, value them. I found wonderful qualities among them and it surprised me because I had been told negative things about them. I began to reflect that you didn't use to be such a negative thinker. You were positive, bright...... I'm still trying to put my finger on when the change came about. I do know that if you are always around negative influences, if you don't take the initiative to turn toward the positive, you can become someone you don't like. It reminds me of a point that <kid I studied with and is now at Bethel> made in a beautiful talk he gave at our hall. It had to do with allowing the bad or negative we are around to influence us so much, we become the thing we hate. I never forgot that because some circumstances I've lived through caused me to become negative.

    When children don't come from a loving family, if they have no one to trust or care for their best interest, if they are not taught to respect their parents or are exposed to things that destroy their trust, they never respect or truly trust anyone. They also undermine the love, trust and respect of others. They only change if they allow Jehovah to heal them and keep their eyes on Jehovah's future promises for us. Don't allow anyone to drive you away from your family, <my name removed> . We all love and care for you. Your fleshly and spiritual family are here for you. <this is a shot at my wife>
    Tomorrow I have a procedure to go through and I didn't want to have bad feelings towards you. How you feel is up to you. The course you take is up to you. I'll keep you in my prayers. As I previously mentioned, I'm forwarding your wife's letter. Pay close attention.

    Your Mother

  • jgnat
    jgnat

    She really doesn't have much left to withdraw from you, does she? Removing you from her blood card? woooooooo

  • sosoconfused
    sosoconfused

    @jgnat - LOL. I thought the same thing as I sat here reading this.

    Make fun of my wife.

    Make fun of my decisions

    Belittle My children.

    How much further can she go

  • jgnat
    jgnat

    You don't want to answer that, sosoconfused. My mentally ill mother has gone pretty far, including cutting me out of family pictures. At some point you may have to stop opening her letters, for your own sake.

  • sosoconfused
    sosoconfused

    I am almost at that point now. She is going into the hospital today and despite the fact that she sent me this letterI was going to go and make sure she was ok. I called her this morning and she told me that it would be better for both of us if I didn't come - I would only be a distraction. I have no idea what that means and truthfully I do not care any more. I amsure plenty of her new spiritual sons and daughters will be there for her.

  • breakfast of champions
    breakfast of champions

    Could it be something left in your new home that you were not aware of?

    Tell her you checked in your attic and found several smurfs living there listening to Led Zepplin albums

    Seriously, I almost laughed out loud when a speaker at the DC said that joining Jehovah's Org protects us from having superstitions.

  • DesirousOfChange
    DesirousOfChange

    She really doesn't have much left to withdraw from you, does she? Removing you from her blood card? woooooooo

    Doc

  • sosoconfused
    sosoconfused

    @boc when we moved to our new home she did a systematic sweep of the place and found these old Margarita glasses in the pantry. She asked me for a plastic bag, broke each one individually, put them in a large construction bag and threw them out in the dumpster at her apartment complex.

    So I said to her, what about the house though... someone else owned the house. She said that is not the same as a personal item..

  • Comatose
    Comatose

    Yeah that's actually creepy because I am 100% serious here - that sounds EXACTLY like my mother. She is unstable. My mother and probably yours too. My wife says my mother actually is kind of scary because she is the type that might do something crazy thinking its for the best. If she is like my mother as much as I think she is, then I'll be surprised if this is truly the last letter. It will fester in her till explosion again. You need to as gently as possible create some distance. It's obvious she loves you, but you need to set some more concrete boundaries for her.

  • Giordano
    Giordano

    She is definitely caught up in verbiage. She's speaking at you not with you. She pulls Jehovah around her like a warm fuzzy blanket. So sorry you have to endure that but it's not uncommon.

    When my mother went into an assisted living facility I paid for the short fall (she had social security but needed some help). She lived about 9 hours away from us. We visited many times each year. I knew she kept a diary. After she passed, after the frustration of the JW funeral experience and the false friendship of the congregation that had stopped visiting her I collected her personal effects and at a later date read her diary. Foolishly I was hoping to share those last visits with her and to see if we had been of some comfort. There was no mention of our visits. It was as if we had never been in her mind or her heart. I, my wife and our son were not mentioned except for one reference....."poor Gio he is not going to survive Armageddon and it is coming soon." This was about 15 years ago.

    Even with her failing mental acuity, even when she had not been to a meeting for 3 years at that point, the imprint on her brain was such that her focus continued to be fixed on the doctrines of her day......... many of which had changed beyond recognition. A mind is a terrible thing to waste and JW's excel at that I am sorry to say.

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