WTS says you are free to do what we tell you

by ozziepost 31 Replies latest jw friends

  • ozziepost

    The May 15 issue of The Watchtower contains a discussion of the question: Would it be advisable for a true Christian to attend a funeral or a wedding in a church?

    The tone of the WTS view is set in the very first line

    Our taking part in any form of false religion is displeasing to Jehovah and must be avoided
    Nonetheless the last line of the article states
    Whatever the situation, the Christian should make sure that the decision will not interfere with his preserving a good conscience before God and men.
    So apparently it's a personal decision for the JW as to whether he/she will attend a funeral in a church or not. And this is confirmed by this line in the last paragraph
    Under certain circumstances he or she may conclude that no difficulties would arise from attending a church funeral or wedding as an observer
    However by the points made throughout the article it's obvious that the Dub who attends puts him/herself in the position of being one who is judged by the congregation. We well know that the words and phrases used in the article are, in fact, 'code' for the R&F telling them "You're not allowed!". We remember the pressure that would be brought to bear from elders and others, the comments, the references in the Kingdom Hall to an "immature publisher", the missing out on assignemnts and 'privileges'.

    The article raises the question of whether a 'Christian' wife of an 'unbelieving husband' may be urged to attend. "Could she join him as a quiet observer?" asks the article. "Quiet observer"? Good grief!! We're talking about a funeral aren't we?

    The article shows how to use pressure. It advises a 'Christian wife' in such a situation that

    it would be to her advantage to explain to her husband that she could not conscientiously share in any religious ceremonies or join in singing of hymns or bow her head when prayer is offered. On the basis of her explanation, he may conclude that his wife's presence could give rise to a situation that might be unpleasant to him. He may choose to go alone out of love for his wife, respect for her beliefs, or a desire to avoid any embarrassment.
    Incredible! How can this recognise the validity of natural grief? How can it be said that the WTS doesn't split families when instructions like this are given to the R&F?

    Lurkers on this board who may be in the process of studying with the JWs should be made aware that these types of scenarios will be 'part and parcel' of your everyday life as a Dub. Is that what you want for yourself and your loved ones?

    Notice the discounting of normal human emotions. Notice the admonition to be "a quiet observer". How can one be anything else at a funeral, I wonder? ! Or are tears of sadness now taboo for "the true Christian"?

    Feel sympathy for those like the sister mentioned in the article as an example. The article says of her "She definitely would want to be settled in her heart, having a clean conscience." If that isn't pressure, what is?

    Yes, the R&F are being told that they are free to exercise their conscience in this matter. But WHOSE conscience?


    "If our hopes for peace are placed in the hands of imperfect people, they are bound to evaporate."

    - Ron Hutchcraft Surviving the Storms of Stress

  • JT

    yes the wt is always telling it's members what to do

    are we not glad we left

  • freeman

    One word comes to mind,



  • JT

    "Our taking part in any form of false religion is displeasing to Jehovah and must be avoided"

    this is truly a powerful catch phrase that the wt often uses

    now who DEFINES the ANY FORM

    could not some conclude your merely attending is taking part in false religion.

    If 3 white guys who are the Police chief, Mayor, and Town Lawyer decide on a Sat night to ONLY ATTEND a KKK Cross burning would they not be consider by many as sharing in the program by their mere presense?

    Well you can rest assured in the minds of a jw AFTER THIS ARTICLE
    if one attends they will be considered by many as Sharing in a FORM OF WORSHIP

    it is this type of Hair splitting that has made the 'WT famous

    in the very opening of the article they LAY DOWN WHAT IS SUPPOSE TO BE GOD'S POSITION ON THE MATTER
    but by the time the article is finish they have wesseled in some exceptions and so forth

    let's just change the statement a bit to illustrate the foolish system of belief they have.


    Our taking part in any form of (SEX OUTSIDE OF MARRIAGE)is displeasing to Jehovah and must be avoided

    nOW WOULD THEY be able to make any part of the above a conscience matter

    you just got to love the boys in writing


  • Bodhisattva

    None of your quotes from the article say "quiet observer," but then again it is implied, and to spell out something implied would be unwatchtowerlike; they expect people to read between the lines and thus believe they have gained special knowledge.

    As to being only an "observer," this may be a change. Not a few witness weddings have included "unbelieving" siblings as groomsmen or bridesmaids, and the reverse also is true. But now, it would seem one is not permitted to be part of the wedding party of one's non-Witness brother or sister! This further separates families. Because many non-Witnesses plan their weddings a year or more in advance, how many young Witnesses must now say to their brother, sister, or old friend, "I'm sorry, I have to pull out of your wedding party, but I am allowed to observe your wedding!" For some, it might be the last straw; for others, the thing that finally gets them to thinking about this religion.

    How much heartache will be caused when, while planning a funeral, Witness relatives say they cannot eulogize the dead? "But you knew Aunt Rita the best!" Eulogies are already forbidden at Witness memorial services, but it is odious to require Witnesses to participate only as "observers" when a relative or close friend dies.

    Is this loving your neighbor as your self? What part of loving God whole-souled requires one to act like a mere acquaintance during a family's time of joy or grief?

  • SPAZnik

    This kind of thing just reminds me how glad i am to be taking my life back.

    I've said it before
    and I'll say it again:



  • TheStar

    This is why as much as I've been advised to fade out slowly, I can not bring myself to go to any meetings at all.

    All of their articles smack full of hypocrisy and manipulation. I sit there so furious I swear you could see the fire coming out of my nostrils.

  • Scully


    This sounds vaguely familiar to the 12/15/2001 WT Questions From Readers article that allowed a "Christian wife" to participate in certain holiday activities at the request of her non-JW husband.

    Very interesting. Thanks for sharing.

    Love, Scully

  • jst2laws


    My wife and I feel the same. Can hardly bear even once a month now.

    Since we have made great progress with our extended family, and have only a few true friends inside, I wonder if we might do more good by exiting with a bang?


  • slipnslidemaster

    Drip, drip, drip, drip, drip...

    Each drip upon the stones wears them down just a little bit more. Weddings are one of the few parties/joyous occasions that Witnesses have left. This will get a few more to leave.

    Slipnslidemaster:"I worked very hard and I earned all the attention I'm getting."
    - Anna Kournikova

    Unseen Apostate Directorate of North America

Share this