Hello everyone, as you can tell I’m new in this community. I didn’t have the courage of posting my introduction until today. I must say this is a very interesting forum; one can find people from all walks of life and different backgrounds sharing fascinating stories. It’s refreshing to read posts where one subject/topic can be analyzed or examined from different angles; I like that. As they say, poeple 'can agree to disagree without being disagreeable’.
In my case I was born in the JW religion and baptized when I was 15. I’ve never been a member of any other religious organization; both of my parents are zealous and devout witnesses as is all my family; I was indoctrinated from an early age. A few years ago, however, I came to know, as many of you call it, the truth about the truth and came to the conclusion that everything I was taught as a witness is just an illusion. After many hours of independent research and investigation, I reached a point where I had to be honest with myself and admit that I was wrong; my little bubble burst. I also realized that I don’t have or need to have the answer to all questions in life. I became very disillusioned with religion in general. I no longer consider the Bible to be the word of God (what makes a tribal Hebrew god any better or credible than Allah, Krishna, Horus, Zeus, etc.). Even though I’m still considered an active witness (I go to meetings, go from door to door in the field service, etc.), it is becoming a difficult task. Sometimes I think I’m insane, I’ve developed at least three different personalities. Personality A allows me to interact with people at the KH, personality B to interact with people at work/school, and personality C that allows me to interact with friends and family in more casual settings. Since all my family is in the organization, if I ever decide to publicly reject the WT (which equals to reject God in the eyes of a witness), it would be the end of all family ties. It’s all very confusing and frustrating at times; I don’t know what to believe anymore. Luckily, I’m in my mid 20s’ and college-educated, it’s just the idea of not having to talk to my family anymore for the rest of my life that scares me. Sometimes I wish there were some kind of time travel device, like in the ‘Back To The Future’ trilogy. Had I known then (when I was a young boy) what I know now about the WT and organized religion, I would probably have never made the decision to join this cult. Anyway, I just wanted to get this off my chest. Thank you for listening, I just wanted to share my story with people who have gone or are going through the same situation.