My husband and I have been fading for the last year. Both of us where born in. The last meeting we attended was the memorial 2012. He had doubts 1st then he started talking to me and that did not go over well. I was so angry and confused i thought of leaving him that he was going to leave me. But for my baby i had to figure stuff out. It took alot of searching and self talk. Everyone needs to go on there own journey and that person has to be ready with a open heart and mind. I felt like a veil was lifted off my eyes and I could see clearly for the 1st time. I would read scriptures and see it in a different way. I had to prove to my self if JW spoke the truth and It felt like I was morning when I learned it was a fairy tale.
We have a 3 year old that I worry about all the time. He has lost his auntie and uncle and cousins who feel be are bad influence because not going to the meetings and have no contact with us. He still has his grandparents in his life but at some point I know they will stop seeing us if we get df'd or find out we are celebrating birthdays or christmas. I dont want them ever to make him feel he is bad for doing these things. I need to remember and keep telling myself that this is their decision and its not my fault he is losing his family.
My brother and sister visited us to "help us" when they found out we might celbrate christmas. They stated it would be against there conscience to be around us and told me I can come back to Jehovah and left. She told me that there is only conditional love in this religion. That was it. I cried but each day gets easier.
I sometimes think worrying about it happening is worse that just getting it over with.
I have opened up to people at my job and everyone has been so nice and supportive. I even have gone to a girls night out for a movie and dinner with people at work. I want to get the JW thinking out of my head, make friends and get friends for my child. I need to replace the family that just walked out on us. The problem is it gets harder to make friends when you are older. But there are kind, loving people that are willing to be there for my family and yours all we need is to reach out to them.
Take one day at a time.
so confused