Farts - Blasting the Chair at the KH (page 3)

ShirleyW

Yup, always enjoy a thread about farting at the meetings ! ! !

Especially when some think they can just ease one out and know one will know, but then you lose all sphincter control and explode like an elephant !

Phizzy

Gotta bump this thread, there must be more fart stories ???????

flipper

I just let em' rip. Didn't care. When I was young I actually sharted . Kinda pissed off my JW mom & dad though. Oh well. $hit happens

NoStonecutters

These are all real funny, but nothing beats Pastor Gas...

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=l3oXOMBCKfM

i remember a young one who was about 7 or 8 yrs old at the time, was sat in front of me on the old plastic chairs. he asked to go to the toilet but his dad told him to wait. he asked again "i need to go dad" ... 'you can hold it till the song!'

i swear when he let it go that kid hovered.

brought the house down with laughter and got a crack off his dad. poor kid

insearchoftruth4

Telling the congregation monkeys {overseers) gets you nowhere. Poor brother textured the bathroom walls cause he had to wait. Told those congregation monkeys to paint over it and they just wanted to argue. I had fun time messing with them.

doofdaddy

I remember one memorable effort back in the 80's from one of the old elders. The sound tore right across the hall and he didn't bat an eyelid. Brought the house down though...Finally came out years later that he was a closet alcoholic and was pissed at every meeting. Lost his priviliges temporarily but what about all those people he disfellowshipped and ripped into from the platform and in private while drunk?! He was a nasty piece of work. Real holy spirit in action.

tiki

i really hated sitting behind some kid that would exude an abominable cloud of methane... very common -especially little boys for some odd reason.

my worst was my beloved hubbie, though.....he is a silent deadly type....and he'd let go and i'd be nauseous - and he'd whisper loudly to me to get to the bathroom.............VERY infuriating, but everyone knew it was him - not perfect little me!!!

oh and in new england it is more like a quack. we shoot ducks in this neck of the woods.

DubR

Funniest thread ever lol. I remember an older bro in my old cong who carried the mic would go to the restroom (during paragraph reading) to pee and forget to turn the mic off. Man one time he did it and I swear the whole cong hear him: whistling, peeing, AND farting. We didn't hear him wash his hands either. I never shook his hand again

Farts - Blasting the Chair at the KH