I guess I had one of the more liberal JW moms. My Father also wasn't a JW, so that helped somewhat. High School was alright. I wanted to do *more*, but what she did let me do at least put me in contact with some of the "normal" kids. I was allowed to go to dances, as long as it was with a JW boy. I was allowed to participate in sports, and journalism, which I really enjoyed. I snuck out alot, that's for sure. Probably shouldn't have done that, but you don't think about that stuff when you're a teenager. I wasn't baptized, so it was different in that aspect, too. Our congregation let the teenagers meet once a week to study the Watchtower, and I could get the car and go early and cruise around at the Mall with worldly friends, then go to the study. I also worked at the Mall, and other high school kids would come in there and hang out. I managed, although if I'd been worldly it would have been a lot different, through school to maintain a least a semblance of a normal life.
How did you fare in High School as a JW?
by PaintedToeNail 41 Replies latest jw friends
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finallysomepride
at high school I was the only jw there, my class mates from primary/intermediate knew i was & told my new class mates, I was picked on a bit, but I stood up to them, with my fists. however i was already suffering from depression & studies suffered badly & in my 2nd year i dropped out. this was in 1975.
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Vidiot
I wasn't too socially isolated; my parents allowed me to hang out with non-Witness kids on occasion (just no birthdays or holidays), but by being dutiful, I did miss out on one or two really pretty potential GFs.
I honestly thought I'd be "blessed" if I played fair and followed the rules; never figured out 'til years later that very few JW teenagers were actually like that, or that very few of them were even virgins, FTM, LOL!
More-or-less bought into the argument that one shouldn't start dating until one was old enough and mature enough to marry, and assumed most other JW teens felt that way, too. Funny how most JW parents acknowledge that teenage years are "training" for adulthood, but allow virtually no training for an integral part of adulthood, namely relationships and parenthood.
It's hard for me to be bitter about it, though.
If my life had gone differently, I wouldn't be the father of two stunning daughters (well... not the ones I have, anyway).
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Ding
PaintedToeNail said:
When asked if I would try out for track and swim team, I had to tell the coaches 'no'.
The WT tells JWs that the world persecutes them.
In fact, non-JWs often go out of their way to be nice and include JWs in activities where they could grow and develop friendships.
The problem is that the GB considers nothing acceptable if it doesn't involve meeting attendance or field service.
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Heartofaboy
High school was not a good time for me.............mainly because I was the JW kid, but also because I was struggling with same sex attraction.
All in all..... it sucked.
I had a small group of friends in class but often they'd go through phases of excluding me from the circle because of some JW issue.
I recall a circuit convention in the early 1970's where the district overseer stressed the need to limit friendship with classmates because of bad association.
After school activities such as sport, art or woodwork which I excelled at was frowned on by the Borg.
The same speaker said one way to see if your friends were good associates would be to offer them a bible study then you would be able to determine their heart condition. If they declined then you had to let then know you could no longer be their friend.
Sadly that is just what many JW kids did to the few school friends they had.
I found the day after the parent teacher evenings particularly difficult. These evenings always fell on a meeting night & trying to explain to an irrate teacher in front of all my class why my parents felt not missing a JW meeting was more important than supporting their child's education was excruciating & futile. I knew as I laid out my course work it was a waste of time.
So being a JW in high school really really sucked!!
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Vidiot
Heartofaboy - "...being a JW in high school really really sucked!"
It did help me grow a thick skin.
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Jim_TX
The whole Junior High and High School years were quite painful for me, but I managed to survive.
In Junior High, I was going through puberty - and no one to talk to. I wasn't sure what was going on. I never got to play sports - outside of gym, and so was really... really... bad at any sport that involved a ball (I.E. baseball, volleyball, soccer, football, etc).
High School, was pretty much the same. I grew taller, and was about 6'0" tall. I remember the basketball coach approaching me one day during lunch, and asked me if I wanted to join the basketball team. I was flattered, flustered and frustrated all at the same time. So, I just turned beet red, mumbled something about "I can't", and disappeared into the crowd.
Being a JW was really a nightmare. Don't stand for the pledge of allegence. Don't go to football games. Don't participate in band (because they may have extracurricular activities). My High School experience was limited to just doing the 8:00 to 3:15 - and then straight home.
No friends - well, I have to be honest, I did know a few kiddos that weren't JWs, and I remember going over to their homes once or twice for an afternoon. But nothing beyond that.
I pretty much stayed to myself in school - knew the library very well, or a secluded corner of the building where no one could bother me.
As a funny anecdote, my ex-wife went to the same H.S. as I did, and later, she commented to me, "I never saw you in school." Very few did. I knew where to disappear to, where no one could bother me.
I was not one of those JWs who went around making everyone know who I was... I wasn't crazy! (Well, maybe I was... but not in a religious/persecution sort of way). I read a lot of books. I scribbled a lot of notes in my notebook.
I remember that there was a couple of young gals that were probably interested in me... I was just too shy and socially inept to know it. Geez... they musta thought that I was a real weirdo.
There were teachers that tried to 'guide' me into 'college bound' courses - but I wasn't going to go to college, so ignored all of their advice, even though I was a straight 'A' student (well... I got a few 'B's, too).
I also had the disadvantage of having older sisters who went through H.S. prior to me, and so knew a lot of what would be going on. Junior National Honor Society was one that my older sister was in. When I got the invitation, it was deemed by my mother, "No. You don't need to be in that."
The ironic part? In doing genealogical research, I also looked up old newspapers from my mom's hometown. There are articles in the paper about her being in High School. Editor of the School Newspaper. Other School activities where she was involved. She didn't get involved with the JWs until much later after she was married and had kids. So... she - in my opinion - unfairly denied me (and my siblings) the same opportunities that she had when she was a kiddo in school.
There are sometimes movies that I watch about kids in High School environments. There is no way that I would consider going back through that experience.
Regards,
Jim TX
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make yourself
Wow for some reason I was really popular .... hmmmm
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LisaRose
High school was OK for me. There was a group of JW kids and we all ate lunch together. There was one "worldly" boy that joined us. He liked me and even continued eating with us after he graduated and was going to the nearby community college. I wouldn't date him be aide he wasn't a JW. He finally joined the army and I got married to another. 28 years later we reconnected on classmates.com and we are married now.
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PaintedToeNail
So, most of us had an unhappy experience and wouldn't want to go through High School again as a JW. Lisarose had a very happy ending, even if it took a while!