How to make your exit with minimal pain while still living at home with your parents

by sseveninches 22 Replies latest jw experiences

  • sseveninches
    sseveninches

    JGNAT - that's a really good and important one, I regret not thinking of it while I was creating the post..

  • MrFreeze
    MrFreeze

    Very good guide seveninches. I can testify my mom and stepdad did kick me out soon after I left.

  • Aware!
    Aware!

    Medina- I'd be interested in reading what you have to say.

  • steve2
    steve2
    "If you've managed to avoid it so far, delay baptism!"

    Whoa! Nice bit of advice - not! That's sure to make the disillusioned young people who have been baptized feel even worse. Given that lots of kids are seduced into baptism by their proud parents by age 13, delaying baptism is not then a realistic option.

    Instead, boldy herald baptism as the FIRST step propeling individuals out of the organization - because the status of now being baptized often brings issues such as doubt and comitment to a head. Young people are often religiously idealistic. Yet it is not until they are smack dab in the middle of things that they see the widespread hypocrisy and double-standards and are confronted with a dawning realization that they have committed themselves to a house of cards.

    Some years ago, a wise old JW woman in my home congregation - who claimed to be of the anointed - was given to muttering negatively about all the young people leaving the organization, "Ah, the sooner they're baptized, the sooner they leave..." She lamented this verifiable fact. I applaud it.

  • TheOutSpoken1
    TheOutSpoken1

    Thanks so much 4 this post...as a jw child who just recently finished my Bachelor's degree while living with JW parent who opposed.....i just want to tell all the other youth who want out to know that it is possible to leave! I cant emphasise it enough to NEVER GET BAPTISED! It is how they exercise power over you and they use it to make you feel guilty and extremely imperfect. You have to build a team of support outside the JW compound in order to survive. Be highly selective with who you share you desire to leave with, even other youths will try to railroad you and report u because they seek prominance in the Org. Im at the phase before the grand exit....let me tell you tell you the feeling of dying on the inside is an understatement. It feels worse, everything associated with the WTBTS is a lost cause and dead to you. Yet you cant speak a word against it. Hang in there...as the saying goes......fail to plan....and you will plan to fail.

  • OnTheWayOut
    OnTheWayOut

    With the young ones chiming in on this thread on page 1, this might make the "Best of JWN" advice.

    Thanks for posting.

    College is not absolutely for everyone, but "educating oneself" is necessary, and preparing yourself for the real world where you will have to live and die of old age (because Armageddom is not around the next corner) is necessary.

  • afreeman
    afreeman

    Thank you for this post, sseveninches.

    Your guide is pretty much the same as what I've planning on doing. I'm a 20 year old who's studying engineering at college and still lives with his parents. I'll just play their little game for two more years or so as I finish college, get a job and move out. Then I'll fade into freedom.

    Things may not go as smoothly, though, given that the elders have been hounding me into becoming a ministerial servant lately. Also because I just got hired at a job that will make me miss the weekday meetings. There is a storm coming, yes.

  • jgnat
    jgnat

    With all due respect, steve2, these are kids, already awakened, who do not want to rush an exit. The financial and personal consequences, while dependents, are steep. Besides, the spectre of the loss of all family ties is devastating to anyone, but especially for young people.

  • Aussie Oz
    Aussie Oz

    My daughter is at phase 7

    fortunatley for her, should she get the swift kick (likely from her dirtbag stepdad) she has my place to come to, and a few real true non JW friends.

    its not easy guiding these kids out, you worry about them when they are not in your care....

    oz

  • moshe
    moshe

    Those who are good actors can pull this off- those who can't pretend and open their mouths, will get the boot. If you think you are in group B, you might want to check out the military- you can get your freedom sooner, not worry about car or apartment and when you get out there wiil be money available for college.

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