Sunday's Drama @ convention!!! OMG!!!

by itscrap&theyknowit! 40 Replies latest jw friends

  • itscrap&theyknowit!
    itscrap&theyknowit!

    The drama -- I basically laughed hysterically!

    I guess marriages are breaking up left and right within the organization. A couple got married young. Neither one had advanced "in the truth". But, the young married sister wanted "peace of mind in her life." The "wholesome" sister told her she didn't have any "proof" that her husband was cheating on her. The sister tells her they have grown apart and the arguments are daily and becoming violent and she just NEEDS out.

    She is basically told to STAY IN YOUR MARRIAGE AND SUFFER!!!!! Of course, the sister who wants the divorce talks to her husband and they "lovingly" decide to stay in the marriage regardless of unhappiness. (((smh)))

    So, of course, my family was hoping that I had change of heart and would have Holy Spirit come down on me and turn me, once again, into a Stepford Wife. LOL!!! No dice!!!

    So, again, they have duped these dumb-a$$, J-dubb sisters into staying miserable as hell in these awful marriages. Bottom line: STAY IN YOUR F'd-UP MARRIAGE!

    Did anyone else get that message???? Just curious................

  • Morbidzbaby
    Morbidzbaby

    I didn't go, but considering a few months back they gave the shining example of a "study" who stayed with her husband who was beating the crap out of her and eventually he converted after 17 years of knocking her around, this doesn't surprise me in the least.

    No matter how much people told me I needed to "work things out" with my ex and that "Jehovah hates a divorcing", after so many years of being the only one trying to make it work and doing everything possible to make him happy and STILL not being good enough...a divorce was just what we needed. If he hadn't thrown me out, I'd probably be dead at my own hand. I was on the verge of a mental breakdown and no one would listen to me...they just kept spouting tired old JW-isms through plastic smiles. Somehow, it all boiled down to it being my fault that I couldn't be happy with a mentally and emotionally abusive husband.

    I think a lot of the problem is that these women are taught that they are valueless. Sure, the literature will state once in a great while how women are a "large army" and will spout off about Lydia and Deborah, etc. But it's rare...and even then, there's still emphasis on the need to be submissive. So, basically "Hey, you broads are great and all, but you still aren't as good as those of us who have a penis! Now BOW and then get your ass back in the kitchen!".

  • LostGeneration
    LostGeneration

    I saw a recording of it, yes you basically nailed it.

    I'm always trying to figure out what sort of behavioral control the bigwigs in Brooklyn are trying to convey in these dramas. I thought they were going to go with the whole "only marry in the lord" type of thing, but in the end it was "stay in your bad marriage" like you stated.

    Kind of a waste of drama time in IMHO. Are there really that many stuck with an unbeliever who are trying to get out? Usually these are the ones given a pass by the elduhs anyway, as their non-believing spouse usually breaks the so-called "scriptural marriage", allowing the JW to find someone else.

    Maybe there are just a lot of breakups where both are JWs, and they are just sending the message in a roundabout way.

    Lame.

  • Morbidzbaby
    Morbidzbaby

    LostGen~ There is more unhappiness in JW marriages in the past few years according to what I've observed in the areas I've lived. More separations and divorces...and a lot of them brought about because the WIFE is the one who either cheats or leaves. That speaks volumes to me.

  • mouthy
    mouthy

    itsacrap&theyknowit!!!!!! Hey kiddo!!! who you calling a dumbass. ME!!!! Yes I was one that stayed in a marriage where I was beat, cheated on, etc etc, Because the ELDERS told me to....Where the heck was you in 1965?????? Oh you wasnt born then. Glad you got brains my love

    Morbidsbaby!!!!!!! Thats because the men didnt satisfy them

  • itscrap&theyknowit!
    itscrap&theyknowit!

    @MORBIDZBZBY - You are HILARIOUS!!!!!!!! Yes! No matter how much you you crya nd scream that YOU need help, you are the under demonic influence (basically) for not taking the force-fed sh** in the marriage!!! EVERYBODY DOES NOT WANT TO EAT SH** FOR THE REST OF THEIR LIVES!!!!

    Yes, the ending of my marriage CAN be my fault!!! Like you said, you can trail this man for years and kiss his ass day and night to keep the marriage going. It doesn't always work!!!! I did it for years! Once I turned around and started treating him like the scum of the F'ing earth, THEN AND ONLY THEN, am FINALLY treated like a human! Finally, I was treated like a human!!!!!!!!!!!!

    Yes, I told all, I will take ALL the blame and glory as to the dissolution of this marriage. I've even dreamt of having seminars to show J-dubb sisters on "how" to get out of their bad marriages. Also, to SHOW them that it is OKAY to DISSOLVE it when it nolonger works for either party. I've seen brothers hold station as elders/servants/c.o./d.o and they had been having affairs on their wives FOR YEARS!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I instruct them to get out, get a formal education and live their lives.

    @LOSTGENERATION- Right!!!!!!! PURE BEHAVIORAL CONTROL! I understand because I was and allowed myself to be controlled for soooooo many years/too many years.

    I can tell you actually what is happening: Get baptized young 10-17 y.o.), get married at 19 y.o., marriage is "cute" because you are both pioneering and he is reaching out in congregation, you're helping out at all the 'quick-builds', hand and hand singing at the assemblies and you're considered as a "young spiritual couple"....and it's soooo damned cute to the on lookers.

    After 2-5 years of marriage: REAL LIFE HAPPENS!!!!!!!!!!!!!

    Start having babies, late for the meetings, too damned tired to go to the meetings, hubby wants hot meals 2-3 times a day just like you did when you first got married

    because you were trying to impress with all you "homemaker" skills but now those days are far and in between because you both work 40-45 hours a week, hubby starts

    (or already has been hanging out w/other brothers over single sisters homes and ex-girlfriends homes and strip clubs and w/the women at hteir jobs, BUT they still

    attend meetings and go out in field service and give Sunday talks and want to knock you upside your head because you and the kids are not ready for field service and

    meetings on time, etc, etc, etc............... NOW the 2 of you argue like bitches and sometimes get into physical altercations where the wife scatches up the husband

    because he's still drunk from the night before w/his other "christian" boys, etc, etc, etc....................

    .......THRU IT ALL YOU ARE TOLD TO TRUST IN jEHOVAH AND BE A GOOD LITTLE DUMB-A$$ WIFE AND HE WILL COME AROUND OR EVENTUALLY THE ANGELS WILL KICK HIM OUT OF THE ORGANIZATION........

    .......but, until then, you have given up your YOUTH from the age of 19 thru 47 y.o...........

    --As told by a woman who is no longer in the Jehovah's Witness Organization, but now happily divorced, educated and living a WONDERFUL LIFE while extensively traveling w/her children and now has a generous 401k investment because she realised that life is truly too damned short and this just may be the ONLY one you get...

    ..........PEOPLE, WAKE UP!!!!!

  • itscrap&theyknowit!
    itscrap&theyknowit!

    @MOUTHY- Oh, honey, I am so sorry you went thru that! But, remember, I went thru it to. The brothers and OLDER sisters in the org told me that I was wrong for even complaining. I was to have a "quiet spirit" and I did. It made me so full of resentment over the years and it takes a lot of deprogramming.

    I've forgiven my husband. I had to learn that to have peace w/in myself. I also learned divorce was even the remedy. I wished I had the balls to do it so much sooner.

    Nolonger are the sisters staying in marriages for 20, 30, 40 years. This generation is jetting after just 2 or 3 years AND are taking their children! This

    new breed will even STRUGGLE a while on there own just to have peace of mind and normalcy. And actually have gotten on their feet and have

    prospered!! Kudos!!! The problem enlies here: they continue to be a part of the org with their new lives! The society sees this and it is scary to

    them! This shows a "new" type of entity amongst the org and the brothers don't like it because it promotes a spirit of "I can do this ALL by myself"

    So, you don't have "family units" in the org and it doesn't have the "appearance" of the true religion. It looks REALLY bad.

    This "new breed" is no damn joke!

  • LostGeneration
    LostGeneration

    I wonder, if at leas subconsciously, some of these JW wives are leaving the idiot JW hubby because the "END" is not in sight.

    I mean in the past, a woman could always say to herself "Just a few more years, then Armageddon will be here. Then Jah will fix this dumbshit I am married to"

    Now, there is no real endpoint in JW doctrine. Just the same old "SOON, SOON, SOON" song and dance in the literature and the assemblies.

    JW women are saying "I picked a loser, I'm not going to stand for this for the next 20, 30 or 40 years. Better to get out now, even if I am DF'd for a few years, then I can get a new man." Then, some find out TTATT when they are out and never come back.

  • diana netherton
    diana netherton

    I think I need to watch it!

  • I quit!
    I quit!

    My JW nephew has been divorce twice already. We've had quite a few JW divorces in our family. They're just like everyone else but like to pretend that they aren't so that they judge others for the same behavior they exhibit.

    The Watchtower wants dubs to stay married even in bad situations so the can sell the public on the idea that it is great to be a JW. They don't care how horrible it is on the inside as long as it looks good on the outside. The Kingdom Hall is nothing more than a "white washed tomb"

    I guess I never was a very good JW because one of the first things I told my wife was that I would hate to be fighting and arguing all the time and if our marriage went in that direction I would be gone.

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