Planning an Escape: Truth Triumphs Over Lies!

by 00DAD 29 Replies latest jw experiences

  • Quendi

    I really appreciated the loving advice nugget gave. It is important to remember how we once thought and felt when we were cult members. The shunning they do is based, not on genuine love for either us or God, but on ignorance and fear. But just because Witnesses shun us doesn't mean that we have to be hateful to them. Nugget reminded me of Jesus' words when he said that God gives good things to all people, even those who deny his existence. Rain, sunshine and the necessities of life are not denied to anyone by God. Why, then, should we withhold love and affection to those Witnesses to whom we were once close?

    In keeping with that, I decided to reach out to the man who was once my best and closest friend in the cult. We went through thick and thin in the years I lived in Colorado and now that I have moved away to Alabama, our contact has completely ceased. I believe he still loves me and misses me terribly but is too afraid to acknowledge or admit it. So today I sent him a very brief e-mail telling him that I wished him well and giving him the URL of my blog in case he wanted to read about my life in the Deep South.

    I don't expect any response to my e-mail but that isn't the point. What is more important is that I let my friend know that I still love him. In my heart I know I am doing the right thing. Thanks again, nugget, for your words of love and wisdom.


  • Hermano

    Thanks for your story 00Dad. Sorry to hear about your son.

    Those in thrall to this poison are hard to reach but nothing is impossible.

    I agree.

  • jgnat

    I'll give a long-term forecast to give you hope. It is very natural for sons, as they work through their identity, to seek out their fathers. This starts in the late teens and continues through their twenties. I am very sure he will look you up sometime then.

    In the meantime, could you compose a dairy or a video log of fatherly hopes and advice? Add snippets at anniversaries and any time you are feeling bereft. I am sure he will treasure it some day and it will be proof that you did not just miss your son in an abstract way. That as a father you genuinely have a great deal to give.

  • Ding
    The fact is there IS no honorable way to leave the religion of Jehovah's Witnesses.

    I remember a former presiding overseer (now and XJW) saying this almost word for word in the early 1980s.

    The UN involvement was a big eye opener to many.

  • sseveninches

    The problem with the UN issue is that now, most active witnesses either don't know (because they came after the fact) or the ones that do know don't dare mention it.

  • LongHairGal


    Like you, I felt the religion having secretly joined the U.N. was a major betrayal and this cannot be forgiven by me. As QUENDI says, there is no honorable way to leave. However, some people are missed more than others and I'm sure you'd be missed more than I was. I was on the "fringes" of the religion as a single working woman who ran from all the USERS there! They have no use for anybody they can't exploit. But that's okay because it was easier for me to "fade" when the time was right!

    I wish you the best.

  • turtleturtle


    You know, the whole UN NGO stuff didn't settle as truth for me. This link sort of debunked the whole UN NGO thing for me:

    Let me know what you think of the link.

  • sseveninches

    turtleturtle, from reading on here in the past few weeks, I've learned that websites like that are called "apologist" websites - sites that are defending the Watchtower. I read that website as well, and while I did believe it for a bit, I started thinking: even if the WT wasn't being hypocritical, it would have AT LEAST issued some sort of apology in their response letters to Stephen Bates from the Guardian, and the branches that were inquiring. Not only was an apology completely absent from the letters sent to these entities, but also they were a bit defensive, as if the WT had every right to be involved with the UN in any way. Ever since I had that thought, I've discredited that website that you linked to, and have seen the WT as a hypocritical organization.

  • besty

    great post 00DAD

  • Listener

    Thanks for the link Turtleturtle. I was aware of the membership form they were sent each year but this made it clear that they signed this yearly membership form and were aware that as an NGO they were ASSOCIATING themselves with the UN Department of Public Information. The Org has also had plenty of opportunities to present the original form they completed and to apologize for their actions but have not done so.

    Thanks for your story Oodad it certainly is a struggle to leave and affects our lives for years to come. It is not just their shunning policy that I find so distasteful but the fact that they indoctrinate the idea that leaving the org = leaving God.

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